Cameraman Never Dies

As the ship slowly sailed into the allegedly "dramatic place" — which looked more like a side quest town rather than the ones in a main quest — Liam finally emerged from his room, hair looking like it had fought three pillow wars and lost every single one.

He squinted at the disaster site that was once his cabin. Clothes hung from the chandelier like bat flags, a shoe had somehow become a ceiling ornament, and his toothbrush was stuck in a porthole like it tried to escape the madness.

"Did my socks try to stage a coup while I was asleep?

Is that a sandwich… under the bed? Wait — is it really a sandwich?

Pretty sure I didn't leave my toothbrush there.

And why is my shoe on the damn ceiling?"

"Why is my stuff all round the room like some damn tornado auditioned for Eldris's Got Talent in here?" Liam groaned, dragging a blanket behind him like a ghost who gave up halfway through haunting.

Completely, blissfully unaware that only an hour ago, a beast with more eyes than a gossip circle at a family reunion had crash-landed on the deck and tried to start a conga line with the crew.

One of his guards considered speaking, but honestly, if he kept quiet long enough, maybe they'd think he was just a statue. Statues didn't get assigned babysitting duty.

But the other one, brave and severely underpaid and who secretly wished he were anywhere else, opened his mouth to explain—but was cut off by Judge and Lediya, who were walking by like two people who'd just been through five horror movies back-to-back.

"Liam…" Judge began, in that slow, betrayed tone people use when they find out their favorite snack was discontinued. "Don't tell me… you slept through every single one of those monster attacks?"

"Huh? What monster?" Liam blinked, rubbing his eyes like sleep was still clinging to him out of spite.

"What do you mean 'What monster?' It had a mouth inside a mouth. And then that mouth had teeth shaped like other mouths." Judge threw his hands up. "The heck? Who in the world SLEEPS through a monster attack?! We almost got eaten by something with more legs than moral boundaries!"

"Y-Young master…" Lediya said quickly, her maid senses tingling. "His scales are glowing."

"His what now?" Judge turned and stared.

Sure enough, Liam's skin was glowing in random, shiny patches — like someone had tried to bedazzle a lizard. The reddish-gold shimmer flickered like bad party lighting before fading slowly.

'Is that… glitter?! Please tell me he didn't fuse with a disco ball.' Judge thought, 'If he starts humming and floating, I swear I'm calling an exorcist. Or a stylist.'

"What is this?!" He demanded, spinning to Lediya, who was already moving toward Liam like she was about to confiscate a cursed object.

"Young master Liam," she said, bowing with all the grace of someone trying very hard to stay polite while dragging two man-sized toddlers through magical puberty. "Pardon me, but for your own sake, we must return to the mansion."

"HUH? Why?" Liam asked, eyes drooping again like his soul was trying to sneak in one more nap.

"Yeah, why?" Judge echoed, looking personally offended that a glowing Liam who had just got done a fancy tattoo had just derailed their super serious plan — which probably involved fighting, sneaking, and several pages of Judge-approved dramatic dialogue.

"I'm not entirely sure," Lediya admitted, adjusting her apron like she was about to do some dragon surgery. "But this appears to be a human remission, something dragons experience about ten years after birth. Occasionally earlier, but never this early…"

"Congratulations, Liam." Judge didn't understand a word. "You're evolving into a slightly shinier liability.

"Human… re-mission?" Liam yawned like the word was just another lullaby. "Strange, I feel really sleepy."

And just like that — boom — he passed out, face-planting directly into the arms of a guard like a sleepy potato falling into a basket.

"WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM?!" Judge rushed forward dramatically. "Liam, blink twice if you joined a cult while sleepwalking."

He slapped his brother's cheeks a little (lightly!), then hovered over his chest… before realizing he had no idea how to check a pulse.

'Okay, pulse check... do I poke him? Blow on him? Wait, where's the user manual?' He awkwardly retracted his hands, pretending to adjust his jacket.

"Worry not, young master," Lediya said smoothly, while gesturing to the guard to carry Liam off like he was luggage. "Master Liam is simply asleep. But we must return to the mansion for proper remission care."

"No!" Judge threw his arm out like a soap opera star refusing a wedding.

"It was the patriarch's direct order," Lediya explained calmly. "If any unforeseen circumstances arise, I am to bring both of you back."

Judge frowned hard, like someone trying to resist a sneeze and an argument at the same time. "Then… let's do this. I'll chase after Mother. You take Liam and go."

"I'm afraid that's not possible," she said with a smile that meant I will tase you with my pinky finger if needed. "The patriarch instructed me to bring both of you back."

"Well I'm not going!" Judge snapped, spinning around. "And if you try to force me — I'll… I'll dramatically monologue the entire way!"

He tried to sound furious.

He tried.

Instead, he fainted like a drama queen who stubbed their ego. One moment he was mid-threat, the next moment he was a floppy pancake.

Lediya sighed as she retracted her hand from the back of his neck. "I am very sorry, young master," she said, catching him gently. "But I've been told to leave no one behind. Especially not the one who thinks he's in charge."

And with both dragon boys now unconscious, one glowing, and both entirely unhelpful, she carried Judge in her arms like a proud, exhausted babysitter who deserved a raise, a nap, and probably a glass of wine.

Off she went, two princes down, several questions unanswered, and not nearly enough hazard pay.