DanMachi: Cheat? What's a Cheat?

Chapter 4: Official Adventurer (Who's Broke AF)

Orario City, Adventurer's Guild

I'm sitting in this plush chair inside the Guild, right across from a woman who's basically carved out a permanent spot in the most organized part of a lot of adventurers' lives.

The couch in this consultation room is actually pretty comfy—way more comfortable than my bed back in the village, which was basically a thin mattress on the floor of a crappy house. I kinda wanna hug the cushions and be like: "I'll come back to you."

Eina Tulle's sitting across the table, holding documents and a pen, staring at me like she's calculating the odds of me dying in the next three days. Or two. Depends on how unlucky I am today.

"...Kaen, right?" she says, raising an eyebrow. "You came here this morning, didn't you?"

I nod. "Yeah. Just got to Orario and came straight to the Guild."

She squints, kinda confused. "I thought you'd come back with a disappointed face after seeing the Familia list and getting rejected by everyone. But... turns out you actually succeeded."

I give a little smirk, trying to sound casual. "Well, after getting rejected by basically every big name... I met one who... didn't reject me."

Eina's expression shifts a bit. "Don't tell me... Hestia-sama?"

I nod slowly.

"She lives in that old church near the west side of town, right?" Eina mutters, more to herself. "I know her... New goddess who came down not too long ago. Pretty... unique. But... kind-hearted."

I stay quiet, not gonna argue with that. Unique is definitely a very polite way to describe Hestia.

"I know a lot of newbie adventurers who... avoid her," Eina continues, her voice gentle but clear. "But it's not because she's bad. It's just because... she doesn't have any facilities."

I smile crookedly. "Well then, we're perfect for each other. 'Cause I don't have anything either."

Her smile grows a little. Maybe there's some sympathy there. Or maybe... a bit of respect?

"Alright," she says, straightening up. "Let's start the registration as an official adventurer."

She opens this big folder on her desk and pulls out some forms. "Full name?"

"Kaen. Just Kaen."

"Age?"

"Seventeen."

"Status?"

I hand over the paper from Hestia showing my first falna status. She glances at it, nods, and starts writing quickly.

Handing over the status paper proves I've joined a familia, and obviously goddess Hestia was careful so she erased the skill section on the paper.

Obviously goddess Hestia doesn't want people knowing about her skills—after all, skills are an adventurer's secret.

"Congratulations on becoming an official adventurer, Kaen," she says in a formal tone. "From now on, you'll be registered in the Guild system and receive missions and payments according to the quests you take."

"Thanks," I say, half nervous, half proud.

And like switching on 'seminar speaker mode,' Eina immediately takes over the conversation.

---

"I know you're a beginner," she says, "so let me explain the most important thing first: The Dungeon isn't a playground."

I nod quickly.

"Lots of beginners think they can just walk in, kill monsters, and walk out with pockets full of valis. But the reality is... monsters in the Dungeon are seriously dangerous. If you let your guard down—even for one second—you could lose your life."

I swallow hard, but keep listening carefully.

"They pop out of walls, from the floor, even from the ceiling. And they won't wait for you to finish swinging your sword. They attack. Constantly. You have to be alert at all times."

Eina keeps explaining:

- The floor system in the Dungeon

- Dangers of monster nests

- Importance of getting out before night if you're not strong enough

- Difference between drop items and magic stones

- And of course: don't get cocky just because you can beat a goblin

I'm taking notes of everything in my head. Seriously. This might be the lesson of my life. Usually in anime, newbie adventurers go into dungeons and die because they're careless. I don't wanna be a victim of episode one.

"Kaen," she says seriously, "I'm glad you're listening. Most beginners just nod and then leave with stupid grins."

I smile a little. "I think... I know I'm not amazing. That's why I have to learn more seriously."

Eina stares at me for a moment, then smiles. This time it's genuine. "You'll last a long time if you stay like this."

I hold my breath. Words like that from someone like her... kinda touches my heart.

---

After the intensive session full of information and veiled death threats, I raise my hand.

"Can I ask something?"

"Sure."

"Does the Guild provide beginner equipment?"

Eina looks at me, then at my shabby clothes and the old wooden sword on my back.

"You... don't have anything, do you?"

I nod slowly. "I'm from a village. There, the economic system is still barter. We trade rice for fish, wood for eggs... stuff like that."

"...And here, we use valis."

"Yup. And I... don't have any valis."

My stomach rumbles right on cue like a sad drum.

"...And you haven't eaten?"

I laugh a little. "Last time I ate... yesterday afternoon. And that was just stale bread. My provisions ran out on the road."

Eina sighs. "Of course the Guild has a beginner equipment program. But... it's not free aid. It's a loan. It'll be deducted from your earnings later."

I nod quickly. "No problem. I've been ready to live poor for a long time. As long as I'm not naked and starving."

She gets up from her chair and goes into the back room. Soon after, she comes back carrying a set of equipment: simple leather armor, a thin steel sword, and a small bag with a potion bottle.

"This is basic gear. Won't make you strong, but at least you won't die immediately."

I accept it carefully like it's treasure.

"Thank you so much, Eina-san. I'll pay it back... with valis."

She smiles, a bit amused. "You're more polite than other newbie adventurers."

I stand up and bow politely. "I'll come back after completing my first mission."

As I turn to leave, she adds, "And Kaen... be careful in the Dungeon."

I look back and smile. "I'll treat the Dungeon like my mother-in-law. Cautious and polite, but ready to run if things get threatening."

She laughs a little. "You're really funny."

---

I leave the Guild with light steps. Not because I'm super excited, but because my stomach's too hungry to walk heavily.

Along the way, magic lamps are starting to light up. Food vendors are setting up their stalls: grilled meat, stuffed bread, hot soup whose aroma stabs straight into my soul.

I swallow hard.

My stomach sounds like a crying kitten.

My eyes are glued to a piece of grilled meat slowly rotating over a fire. Oil dripping, the aroma like a devil's whisper.

NO.

I turn away. Walk away. Hug my bag of new equipment like a baby. I have to endure.

"I'm... seriously broke," I whisper.

No answer. Even my stomach's too weak to growl.

My steps are shaky. But I keep walking. Toward the old church. The thin bed awaits me. And maybe... a bowl of warm soup from the tiny goddess who's now my family.

Maybe.

If she didn't eat it all first.

I can only pray that goddess Hestia prepared food for her.

Wait, that doesn't make sense. I mean, I can only pray that goddess Hestia prepared food for us.