Demon of Dawn and Dusk

As I considered what my desires might be, and how I could cause my hunger to explode out of control, I studied Cultivator Jasmine.

“Maybe that was why Cultivator Violet asked you to attend to me.” I said to her. “She wanted you to help me discover my desires, the ones I don’t know about yet.” I frowned. “However, that doesn’t make sense. I have no interest in revenge.”

Cultivator Jasmine pursed her lips.

“Senior Sister Jasmine told you about me?” She asked, sounding displeased.

“Only that you joined the Flowering Blossom Palace to gain revenge.” I said, holding my hands up in a placating gesture. “Nothing more.”

Cultivator Jasmine didn’t respond right away, as if lost in thought, before she leaned in closer to me.

“Revenge is why I joined the Flowering Blossom Palace, yes.” She said. “However, that isn’t my only desire. People are complex beings, though they may not seem like it from the outside. I think that Senior Sister Violet believes that you and I share desires, and that is why she tasked me with attending to you. Shall we put that to the test?”

I frowned.

“How would we do that?” I asked.

“You said my appearance didn’t disgust you>” Cultivator Jasmine said. “Prove it.”

For the first time since I met her, she seemed amused. Until this point, she wore a cold and indifferent expression on her face. However, her amusement contained traces of mockery and self deprecation. It was as if she couldn’t believe that no one wouldn’t be disgusted by her appearance. This annoyed me.

Without saying a word, I reached for Cultivator Jasmine’s face. She watched me with flinching or recoiling back. I caressed her cheek for a brief moment, feeling her scars beneath my fingers, before I grabbed the back of her head and kissed her. However, I didn’t kiss her on the lips. Instead, I kissed her scars.

When she realized this, Cultivator Jasmine stiffened but didn’t pull back. It took some time, but I kissed each and every single scar. My hunger grew stronger each time. When I finished and pulled away from her, Cultivator Jasmine stared at me with wide eyes, trembling.

“Is that proof enough?” I asked.

Cultivator Jasmine swallowed and nodded.

“You stir my desires.” I whispered. “Why? What is it about you that I hunger for?”

Maybe I was wrong and I wanted revenge against my kin. No, that didn’t seem right. In that case, what was it about Cultivator Jasmine that aroused my hunger? It wasn’t her appearance. While her scars didn’t disgust me, she wasn’t beautiful by any stretch of the imagination. Besides, if beauty was all it took, then why hadn’t Cultivator Aneira stirred my hunger?

“Perhaps telling you my story will help you find out.” Cultivator Jasmine said, her voice softer and more gentle than before. “Would you care to hear it?”

I nodded.

“I was born into a prominent clan on the Northern Region’s eastern continent,” Cultivator Jasmine began, “One half of a pair of twins.”

That surprised me. An ocean separated the Northern Region’s central and eastern continents. Even with the teleportation array network, traveling from one to the other was a long and arduous journey. How did someone like Cultivator Jasmine end up in the Flowering Blossom Palace?

“My twin sister is a prodigy and a genius,” Cultivator Jasmine said, “Meanwhile, I was well below average compared to her. It was as if the heavens took all of the talent that should have been mine and gave it to her instead.” Her expression grew bitter. “As you can no doubt guess, my clan viewed my sister as a gift from the heavens, a phoenix among women. As for me, well, I was nothing more than useless trash in their eyes. They always found me lacking compared to her.”

My breath caught in my throat. While there were obvious differences between us, I couldn’t help but notice the similarities between the way Cultivator Jasmine’s clan treated her and the way Clan Wind Dance treated me.

“Even our parents favored my sister.” Cultivator Jasmine said. “They made no attempts to hide it. I tried to earn their favor and approval, but none of my efforts mattered. In their eyes, my only use was to secure an advantageous marriage for my family and hopefully give birth to more talented, more useful, children.”

The cup in my hand shattered as I squeezed my hand into a fist, spilling wine everywhere. The sound startled most of the dancers, who stopped and stared, except for Cultivators Violet and Rose. They continued dancing as if nothing happened. After a moment, the others continued as well.

Cultivator Jasmine pulled a cloth from her storage ring and used it to wipe away the spilled wine.

“Thank you.” She said in a soft voice.

“For what?” I asked.

“For getting angry on my behalf.”

I pulled her onto my lap and embraced her. Cultivator Jasmine yelped.

“Young Master Darian!” She exclaimed, sounding flustered.

“Sorry,” I said, my voice rough, “I just… I need to do this, otherwise I might fly into a rage.”

Cultivator Jasmine’s story stirred up old feelings, ones I thought I had forgotten. Inadequacy, self loathing, loneliness. Astra rescued me from Mt. Wind Dance, but a part of me remained the child who grew up alone and hated by almost everyone around him. The warmth of Cultivator Jasmine’s body helped banish those feelings.

My hunger stirred. Heat and pressure began to build inside me.

“Shall I stop here then?” Cultivator Jasmine asked.

I shook my head.

“Keep going.” I pulled away, just enough to look at her. “Unless you don’t wish to continue. I won’t force you.”

Cultivator Jasmine shook her head.

“No, I will continue.” She said. “I want to. Telling you my story isn’t as painful as I expected it to be.” She smiled. “Maybe Senior Sister Violet intended to help both of us when she asked me to attend to you.”

Cultivator Jasmine shifted into a more comfortable position atop my lap before continuing.

“The only one in my clan who treated me with kindness was my twin sister.” She said. “I loved her, and she loved me, or so I thought. It wasn’t until our parents arranged a marriage for me that I saw her true colors.” She grimaced. “It turned out that my twin sister loved my betrothed, and the idea that I, the trash of our clan, would marry him filled her with rage. She attacked me and ruined my face. It hurt, but not as much as the pain from her betrayal. When I asked her why she did it, she said that she always hated me. She hated how weak and useless I was. She hated how I kept trying to earn our parents’ approval instead of knowing my place. Most of all, she hated that we shared the same face. The only reason she kept me around was to make her shine brighter. A flower looks more beautiful when compared to a weed.”

I squeezed Cultivator Jasmine harder against me, though I made sure not to hurt her. If Lucius betrayed me the same way Cultivator Jasmine’s twin sister betrayed her, how would I have felt? Devastated. If the one person I loved and trusted turned their back on me, I would have lost all hope.

The heat and pressure inside me continued to build.

“My betrothed’s family broke off the engagement when they saw what happened to me.” Cultivator Jasmine said. “In their own words, they didn’t want damaged goods. My clan punished my twin sister. Not for attacking, but for ruining an advantageous deal for the clan. As for me, my kin decided that I was completely useless to them, so they kicked me out of the clan. Even my family turned their backs on me. No matter how much I begged and pleaded, none of them listened.”

She let out a bitter laugh. I took her hands in my own and she held onto me, like a drowning woman grasping for a lifeline.

“However, that wasn’t the end of it.” Cultivator Jasmine said. “My twin sister had one final surprise for me. After I left our clan’s territory, she attacked me and shattered my cultivation, before selling me to slave traders. I endured three years of that hell, before I escaped. After swearing revenge against my twin sister and my clan, I joined the Flowering Blossom Palace. And that, Young Master Darian, is my story.”

It was clear that there was more to Cultivator Jasmine’s story than she let on. After all, she had her cultivation shattered. For most cultivators, that was a crippling injury. Somehow, Cultivator Jasmine managed to repair her broken cultivation and reach peak Qi Condensation. I suspected that she had a fortuitous encounter of some kind. Not only that, but Cultivator Jasmine never identified which clan she came from.

However, that was her business, not mine. She wasn’t obligated to tell me everything. What she told me was helpful enough. I now knew why Cultivator Violet paired us together.

“So, what do you think, Young Master Darian?” Cultivator Jasmine asked in a tone full of bitterness and mockery. “How do you feel, now that you know my story? Pity? Righteous anger on my behalf? Or perhaps the story of a young woman’s fall from grace aroused your interest and you’ve discovered that’s where your tastes lay? There are those who enjoy the pain of others. Maybe you’re one of them.”

I didn’t take Cultivator Jasmine’s words to heart. It was clear to me that what happened still pained her and she was lashing out as a result.

“You still love them, don’t you?” I asked.

Cultivator Jasmine stilled at my question.

“What…What do you mean?” She asked.

“Your family,” I said, “Maybe even your sister too. You still love them, don’t you? Despite everything they did, deep down you still love them and you want them to love you back.”

She started shaking.

“Don’t.” She said. “Don’t speak as if you know me just because I told you a bit of my history. I’m not so pathetic as to love those who tossed me away.”

“But you do.” I said. “I know, because I’m similar. While my story isn’t the same as yours, it is similar enough that I understand. I understand what it is to be the child cast out into the cold, longing for the warmth of home and hearth. I understand craving the attention of your kin, even as they treat you with scorn.” I let out a bitter chuckle. “I understand that desperate need for love and affection.”

That was what was missing. That was the reason why my hunger hadn’t exploded out of control yet. This Frenzy of Unchained Passion lacked my greatest desire: I wanted to love and be loved.

When Astra rescued me from Mt. Wind Dance, I learned what it was like to have a family. However, that apparently wasn’t enough for me. I wanted more. That was why I wanted more than one wife. Ellen. Willow. Harlow. Clarissa. I wanted them all. And now I wanted Cultivator Jasmine. How greedy and selfish of me.

The heat and pressure inside me reached a boiling point, ready to explode. I was on the verge of losing control.

“Thank you, Cultivator Jasmine,” I said, through clenched teeth, “You helped me discover the source of the problem.” I let go of her. “However, I suggest you leave now. If you don’t, I won’t be held responsible for what happens next.”

I wanted to give her a choice in the matter. Cultivator Jasmine wasn’t an object or a possession to be taken. She was her own person. As much as I wanted her, I didn’t want to force myself on her. Besides, she was a disciple of the Flowering Blossom Palace. From what I understood, she was in essence a courtesan. There was no way my sisters would accept it if I fell in love with her.

Hmph. As if I was going to let that stop me.

Cultivator Jasmine shifted her body around to face me. The movement almost caused me to lose control of myself. My senses were attuned to her. Everything she did, even the way she breathed, elicited a heightened reaction from me.

“And what will happen if I don’t leave?” She asked, her voice containing a hint of challenge.

I looked her right in the eyes.

“I will take you,” I said, “And I will claim as you my own. That is the kind of demon I am. Your desire matches mine. Love me, and I will love you in return.”

Cultivator Jasmine snorted.

“We only just met and you claim that you will love me?” She asked in a mocking tone. “My, what a fickle heart you have.” Her expression grew serious. “Not only that, but you’re a fool. You should know what kind of woman I am. I lost my purity a long time ago. Do you still claim that you will love me, Young Master Darian?”

I grasped her chin between my finger and my thumb.

“I don’t care how many men you’ve been with before me,” I said. “All that matters is that I am the last. Do you understand?”

Cultivator Jasmine chuckled and shook her head.

“I see that you’re all or nothing, Young Master Darian.” She said. “However, you can stop holding back. I’ll be yours, even if it’s only for a brief time.”

With that, the last thread of self control that I possessed snapped. The heat and pressure exploded and surged through me, filling my entire being. It felt as if I were burning from the inside out. My nerves felt like they were on fire. I hunched over, grasping the nearby table for support.

The heat and pressure raged inside me, as if remaking me. It reminded me somewhat of when I cultivated with the Asura Crucible Body technique. I felt a sharp pain in my forehead, as if there was something digging into my skull. No. As if there was something ready to burst out.

When she saw all this, Cultivator Jasmine’s eyes grew wide and she shuffled away from me. However, she didn’t flee. Instead, she looked at the table and picked up a jade bottle. It was the one that Cultivator Rose offered me earlier. I had completely forgotten about it until now.

“I have a feeling that I’m going to need this.” Cultivator Jasmine said, before opening the bottle and swallowing the pill inside.

Just as this happened, the pain in my forehead reached a crescendo and something exploded out. No. Two things exploded out. I reached up and felt a pair of horns emerging from my forehead. That wasn’t the only change that took place. I watched as my skin darkened, until it became ash gray. Black and gold scales formed, covering my arms from my hands up to my elbows. My fingernails became sharp claws. The sound of a dragon’s roar filled the air, and I realized that it came from me.

The changes inside my body were just as dramatic. I felt myself grow stronger, tougher, more durable. Not only that, but my hunger consumed me. We became one, until there was no separation between us. I was the hunger, and the hunger was me. All other thoughts fled my mind, until nothing but the hunger remained.

I looked over at Cultivator Jasmine. Her face was flushed and her pupils were dilated. She opened her robe, revealing a tantalizing amount of skin. Even before my body finished changing, I pounced on her and pinned her to the ground. She didn’t seem alarmed by this. In fact, she stared up at me with a hunger that mirrored my own. She licked her lips in anticipation.

I leaned down and bit Cultivator Jasmine’s shoulder. She let out a moan, which sounded sweet to my ears.

“Mine.” I growled in her ear.

“Yours.” she breathed out.

With that, I made good on my word and claimed her.

What followed was a never ending stream of excess and debauchery. My hunger rampaged out of control. Rather, since I was the hunger and the hunger was me, I rampaged out of control. It was as if I had become a beast driven by my baser nature. Despite this, I remained aware of myself and my surroundings. I remembered everything with perfect clarity.

I took Cultivator Jasmine over and over again, and she gave herself to me each time. However, while my focus was on her, she wasn’t the only one I indulged myself in. Cultivator Violet, Cultivator Rose, and other disciples of Flowering Blossom Palace joined in as well. Their skills and techniques took me to heights of pleasure that I never thought were possible. Despite this, they never satisfied me the same way that Cultivator Jasmine did. I could never get enough of her.

When I didn’t indulge myself in Cultivator Jasmine and the others, I ate and drank with complete abandon. It was as if my stomach was a never ending pit. No matter how much food I ate or how much wine I drank, I remained hungry. A void existed inside of me, one that could never be filled. Only Cultivator Jasmine’s presence brought me any measure of peace.

After what felt like an eternity, I started to regain control of myself. Little by little, I reined my hunger in. The hunger didn’t go away. It would forever be a part of me, but it no longer controlled my actions.

When I came back to my senses in full, I sat up and looked around. Cultivator Jasmine lay asleep next to me, using her robes as a blanket. At some point earlier, I had torn them because they were in the way and Cultivator Jasmine never replaced them.

Other disciples of Flowering Blossom Palace, with the exception of Cultivators Rose and Violet, surrounded us in various states of dress. They were also asleep. There were a few who cuddled together, more interested in the company of women than men. During the Frenzy of Unchained Passion, they focused more on each other than me. Not that I minded. It wasn’t as if I suffered from a dearth of partners. As for Cultivators Violet and Rose, they left at some point to handle sect business and hadn’t returned.

Realizing that my time with Flowering Blossom Palace was coming to an end, I laid back down and took Cultivator Jasmine into my arms. My feelings for her were complicated. I wanted to love her, and be loved by her, but I knew that rushing into things was a bad idea. My experiences with Ellen taught me that. If I tried, my sisters would interfere.

Besides, I wasn’t sure how Cultivator Jasmine felt about me. Just because she shared my desire to love and be loved, that didn’t mean she would throw everything aside to be with me. At the end of the day, we were strangers to one another and she had her own life to live. Still, that didn’t stop me from wanting her.

When I took her into my arms, Cultivator Jasmine let out a groan.

“Please, no more, Young Master Darian.” She muttered, her eyes still closed. “Even with the help of aphrodisiac pills, I have reached my limit. Indulge in someone else and let me rest.”

I kissed the back of her neck.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, “I didn’t mean to wake you up.”

Cultivator Jasmine stiffened for a moment, before relaxing.

“You’ve come back to your senses.” She said, speaking like a judge delivering a verdict.

“Yes.” I said. “Which means that I will have to return to the Dawn and Dusk Sect soon.” I kissed her neck again. “The question is, what happens between us now?”