Harem Streamer System: Every Crime I Broadcast Wins Me a Superheroine

━ Metro City, 10:47 PM ━

The black-and-chrome 2043 Mercedes-Benz Sprinter V-Class XL cruised through the glowing night streets of Metro City like a sleek predator on the hunt.

Neon billboards kissed the glassy exterior in streaks of violet, blue, and gold.

The calmness of the night was almost drowned out by the deep, endless thumping of bass-heavy club music vibrating from within. People on the sidewalks turned their heads, jaws slack—because whatever was happening in that luxury bus, it wasn't a commute. It was a party.

And yeah. You could say that they were clubbing inside.

Inside the luxury suite-on-wheels, Jason Larkens—

The young, rakish CEO of MegaCorp.

He was lounging like a Roman emperor on leather recliners so soft they could've been made of angel hide.

Three impossibly gorgeous European women surrounded him, legs crossed, dresses shorter than decency, pupils slightly too dilated to pass a sobriety test. One giggled as she pressed her cheek to his, another nibbled playfully on his ear while the third practically melted into his lap.

Across the cabin, Vincent Lakewood, Priority Solutions' Chief Strategy Officer, sat in a custom champagne booth with his legs stretched out like he owned gravity. He swirled a gold-stemmed glass in his fingers, eyes fixed on the mounted ultra-HD television screen.

The program? KKK Show.

The host? Konrad Kain—rage incarnate in a suit.

And they weren't alone.

Also seated in the plush interior were The Peak, Pulsar and Irina Golovin, the Russian-born fan-favorite who dressed in baggy jeans and an oversized blue tee like any civilian — because when your face was already that famous, secret identities were just formalities.

They were all watching Konrad Kain lose his mind.

"This is a travesty!"

Konrad slammed his fist onto the table in anger.

"It's been a little over twenty-four hours since Shadow unmasked himself as Nightwatch, and the Hero Agency still hasn't done a damn thing! Not a public statement, not a suspension—nothing!"

His deep voice quivered as he leaned forward, his rich brown skin nearly red from rage.

"I don't care if Rope Girl thinks working with him makes him 'redeemable.' That useless traitor should be strung up by her watermelon haircut! Anyone who supports that lunatic should be STRAPPED to a TORTURE BOARD and taught what a REAL hero looks like!!"

His finger jabbed like a weapon toward the camera.

"If you want to see a real hero? One who's loyal to this country? Then look no further than The Peak! That man is the spitting image of what it means to be a hero! Meanwhile that masked devil is out there stealing attention with his criminal drama arc AND GETTING MONEY FOR IT!"

Vincent laughed mid-sip, clinking glasses with The Peak, who smirked in that smug, golden-boy way he did before every photo-op. The moment was so tone-deaf, so self-congratulatory, that Pulsar physically winced while Irina pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Thanks to the Hero Agency backing our claims…"

Vincent paused to take a sip.

"The Peak and Pulsar are top on nearly every major streaming platform. Only one that occasionally tops them… is Ms. Metamorpha. And let's be honest… we know why."

The Peak raised an eyebrow, confused.

"Ms. Metamorpha? Who the hell's that? And how's she beating me?"

His heart spiked.

"I get about three to five million viewers per stream!"

He instantly pulled out his phone and scrolled through his apps with the panicked urgency of a man checking his own stock portfolio during a crash.

Pulsar and Irina exchanged a look of silent exasperation.

『Who were the five million people watching this idiot every stream?』

They didn't need to say it.

Their faces said everything.

And the moment they realized they were thinking the same thing? Their irritation cracked into that awkward sort of "we're too predictable" half-smirk.

"AHA!"

The Peak suddenly shouted, holding up his phone.

"That's why! Ms. Metamorpha is Chimera Girl! IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE NOW! She's literally the number one bop on FansOnly! Even bigger than Foxgirl!"

He seemed genuinely proud to be defeated in popularity by a high-tier sex worker. Pulsar muttered something inaudible as she leaned over and squinted at his phone.

"Wait… hold on."

Her cute purple eyes squinted more.

"Someone else just overtook the top spot…"

"What?"

Vincent scoffed.

"Impossible. That algorithm's locked in. We've been doing daily streams, sponsored reels, crossover collabs—I've spent more on stream marketing than a presidential campaign! Who the hell tops that?!"

Pulsar's dainty finger slowly dragged across the screen to highlight a single name.

"It's… Nightwatch?"

She said flatly.

"He's had more engagements and comments in the last 22 hours than we've had all week."

Silence.

Vincent's champagne glass stopped halfway to his lips.

"… Excuse me?"

Pulsar flipped the phone toward him.

The screen didn't lie.

Across Glitch, WeTube, HeroCast, HoloView, and even private substream aggregators, Nightwatch was #1.

Engagement through the roof.

Trending in over a hundred countries.

Comment floods in every language.

Vincent's fingers trembled as he gently took the phone and stared at it. His grip tightened like he was holding a live grenade. Then—like a man suppressing madness—he forced a brittle smile and took the smallest, most dignified sip possible.

He was shaking so hard, he looked like a faulty washing machine mid-cycle.

"Perfect…"

He muttered painfully.

"Just perfect… I invest half a billion dollars making these two the most marketable heroes on the planet, and this skinny bastard in a mask drops a collab with Rope Girl and steals the narrative. With a comeback video? That's how low the bar's gotten?"

He let out a short, manic laugh that made Irina shuffle a bit away from him.

"Don't worry…"

He added darkly.

"Once we get to Meteor City for the next phase of the SMPE tomorrow, I'll make sure every platform exec remembers who pays their bonuses. We'll see how long Nightwatch gets to stay relevant once I'm done."

He gulped the rest of the champagne and tossed the empty glass across the cabin like a spent bullet casing.

Meanwhile, Jason was still fully immersed in his pleasure palace. He snorted a line off the lips of a giggling blonde, kissed her messily, and grinned like a devil made flesh.

"Can we not worry about this tonight?"

Jason said lazily.

"After all, we're going to Gold Cuts. Let's celebrate the million-dollar merch drop. The SMPE starts tomorrow and I'm sure Pulsar's new look will make Irina here steal the spotlight."

Pulsar raised an eyebrow as Jason smeared white powder on another woman's cheek and kissed it off like it was whipped cream.

She folded her arms tight and grumbled—

"What about Miss Mercury? Pretty sure she's got more fan-praise than me. Her last viral video—"

Jason's mood shifted instantly.

He fixed her with a cold stare.

"That fat-assed C-rank?"

He scoffed.

"Her contract expires soon. Doesn't fucking matter how many awards she bagged this month. If we cut her? She's out of the Superhero Excellence Awards. Simple. She's not one of us. Never was."

Vincent laughed so hard he nearly choked.

"Amen to that!"

The Peak chuckled while the European women clapped like this was some comedy special.

Irina looked down.

"But that's not fair…"

She muttered.

"Miss Mercury literally helped bring supplies to South Sudan last month. She—"

"Wait."

Pulsar cut in softly, smirking.

"Irina… do you like Miss Mercury?"

Irina's face exploded in red.

"WH-, WHAT──? NO! OF COURSE NOT!"

She flailed as her cute little ears practically steamed.

Jason leaned forward, voice like ice.

"Good. You're the upgrade. You're not here to fangirl that dumb bitch—you're here to replace her."

He let out a slow, mocking laugh.

"Let her feed Africa. She won't be feeding her shit career much longer."

Irina looked down again. And nodded, quietly.

"NOW LET'S GO EAT!"

The Peak shouted, throwing his hands up in celebration.

Everyone laughed.

The bus thumped harder with music and flickering lights.

Everyone laughed… except Irina.

She stayed quiet. Her head lowered.

While Pulsar watched her in silence—there was a hidden concern on her face.

And outside, the streets of Metro City kept rolling by.

But far off, something seemed to be rocking the digital world as they celebrated.

Nightwatch… was streaming.

[Nightwatch LIVE: 2.5M viewers]

The night was sharp and loud with laughter.

A sexy, feminine one.

From one rooftop to another, Cat Lady sailed through the shadows with ease. Her lithe frame danced over chimneys and neon signs as her laughter charming persisted

Behind her… was Nightwatch.

He was on her tail—literally—boots pounding against steel with relentless speed. In one precise motion, he hurled a cluster of sleek, crescent-shaped nightwings at her.

—SHIIINK SHIINK SHHHK!

But she flipped—gracefully—from side to side, almost taunting the blades as they zipped past. Then, with a twist of her wrist, her whip lashed out—

CRACK!

It caught the edge of a flickering billboard for—

[Galaxy Cola™]

She swung like a circus queen onto the next highrise.

"Tch—"

Nightwatch didn't hesitate.

"You're not getting away!"

His arm extended, and from the compact cuff on his wrist, a grappling hook hissed out and latched onto a crane post three buildings away.

FWOOOOOSH!

With a mighty pull, he shot forward, reeling in like a missile—and landed just as Cat Lady was mid-run.

She glanced back, smirking sexily through her hair.

"Oh come on~"

She purred through giggles.

"Can't you just let me have the win tonight?"

And then—WHOOM WHOOM WHOOM—she launched into a series of cartwheels.

Not the kind you see at gymnastics meets—no.

These were powerful, acrobatic, impossibly fast, flipping her body like a weapon through the air.

She landed with a cat-like thud atop another highrise.

Nightwatch simply grunted, took a breath—and leapt with a single, thunderous jump.

"As if…"

He said coolly.

"You're lucky you weren't with Trickshot and the Terror Twins last night. I'd have put a collar on you and sent you to a nice little cell by now."

"Collar? Kinky~ ❤️" Cat Lady winked at him.

"DIRTY CAT!"

Cat Lady just chuckled with a sexy, low laugh.

"Ohhh~ come onnn~ Like you'd let me go to jail? Stop acting like you haven't been staring at my ass this whole time… fufu~ ❤️"

She turned to glance back over her shoulder mid-run as her big hips swayed like a slow metronome.

Nightwatch flinched.

"HUH—?! I-I WASN'T—!"

The livestream chat didn't care for explanations.

[Unc was ready to risk it ALL]

[Nightwatch got that ass radar activated]

[Bro said HUH like he's innocent or something 💀]

└ [21 CARS?! THAT'S CRAAAAZY ahh 😭🖐️]

└ [Kek, elite reference 🗿]

[THE POWER OF NYASH IS UNSTOPPABLE]

[He's just like us fr…]

[She has a fat ass, and that pumpum looks so thick you'd think she shoved a burrito down there, but to be honest I like myself a titty kitty 🤷‍♂️]

└ [AIN'T NO WAY YOU JUST SAID THIS 😭]

└ [Why do you want it unwashed tho???]

└ [Gotta get that smegma nutrients 🤷‍♂️]

[Hmm, Nightwatch out here thinking about eating some of that unwashed little kitty pumpum 😤]

└ [Ngl he just like me fr 🤪]

└ [Dawg, what? Are we deadass rn? 💀]

･･･

Then—comms spark to life.

Gadget Girl's voice snapped in—

[Are you seriously staring at her ass?!]

Nightwatch tripped over a pipe.

"I SWEAR I'M NOT!"

Jake chuckled in through the comms—

[Ohhoho~ you definitely are, dude. I mean, don't lie—Cat Lady's ass is perky in all the right w—OW!!]

The sound of Jake rubbing his head could be heard.

[Why'd you hit me?!]

Gadget Girl snapped—

[Focus, you idiots! We need her for intel on who helped Trickshot and the Twins at Volkner Labs. The culprit might be the only one who knows where the Mutagenium and the centrifuge are!]

The comms go silent.

Nightwatch gritted his teeth.

His eyes locked forward. No more distractions.

He saw her now—about to leap over another AC unit.

"System…"

He muttered, holding out his hand.

"Calculate shot timing."

[SYSTEM ONLINE - CALCULATING TRAJECTORY…]

A holographic ring scanned the AC unit and Cat Lady's trajectory. The blue technophage wrapped around his forearm shimmered and transformed into a high-tech staple cannon.

"Okay…"

He whispered.

"Okay…"

His eyes narrowed slightly.

"GOTCHA!"

He fired.

THWUNK!

The heavy staple nailed her ankle to the AC unit.

Cat Lady slammed into the side like a sack of sass.

[BRO GOT HER LIKE RAW MEAT!]

[STAPLED HER LIKE A SCHOOL PROJECT]

[Mission failed, she got seduced by staples]

[@ButtProject donated $5,000 – Now strip her clothes and have sex with her crazy monkey style 🔥🔥]

└ [You should've used that money for therapy bro 💀]

[This is the right time to dip your nose in that ass!]

└ [United States honorable whiff of honor 😭🙏]

└ [Finna swipe my nose through it like a credit card!]

･･･

Nightwatch transformed the staple gun back and dusted his hands. He casually sat on the AC unit and crossed a leg over the other.

"Well, well, well…"

He already had a smug face.

Cat Lady lay flat, leg caught, chest heaving, eyes blazing.

But then—she smiled like a naughty little devil.

She crawled closer on her belly, practically purring.

"Ohhh~ so now that you've got me, what're you gonna do to me, hmm~? Hopefully not horrible things?"

She licked her lips and giggled.

"Give me what you took from Zenith Labs…"

Nightwatch said, holding out his hand.

She tilted her head like a cat.

"The flashdrive?"

She batted her lashes.

"Well, I could give it to you…"

She pushed her chest forward, cleavage bouncing slightly in her tight suit.

"Hnn~ ❤️ right here, boyyy~ ❤️"

Nightwatch didn't even blink.

"That trick doesn't work on me."

He reached forward—and jammed his hand into the softness of her cleavage.

Her face turned BRIGHT RED. Eyes wide.

"W-, WHA──?!"

He fished around, getting a feel of her small, soft breasts as well as her pert nipples.

Then, he pulled the flashdrive out.

It now smelled like tulips—very sweet.

Cat Lady hungrily bit her lower lip.

"Come on… sniff it like a good boy ❤️"

He stared at it in mild disgust and slipped it into his belt.

"I'll pass…"

Cat Lady puffed her cheeks and let out a cute "Hmph!"

[BRO DUG IN THE MILK WITHOUT HESITATION]

[Nightwatch a better man than me, I wouldn't even ask for consent before diving into them milk and cookies and I put that on my goldfish, Larry 😭]

└ [Bro folded under zero pressure 💀]

└ [We did NOT need to know this bro 😞]

└ [At what point will diaries become a thing again?]

[No hesitation. Raw. Ruthless. King behavior.]

└ [More like father of five behavior]

[This man ain't even blink at cleavage 😭]

[I can smell the tulips from here]

└ [I'm gooning to the tulips]

[The fact you can just tell SleazyPen is not in the comments by how tame it is]

└ [Ms. Metamorpha is streaming, he's her top fan so…]

└ [The fact these comments are "tame" is wild 💀]

･･･

But then… a cold, clammy hand settled on Nightwatch's shoulder.

"I like how your ass looks in those tights, mmm~"

The mysterious person licked his dirty, wrinkled lips with his smelly, slimy tongue.

"It reminds me of how my Dad used to choke me at night and force me to eat his asshole…"

Nightwatch FROZE.

"You know, I always claimed I was the victim… but I enjoyed eating it."

He collapsed.

"Ghck—what the hell…?!"

Cat Lady yanked the flashdrive from his belt and cackled.

She leaned close, lips brushing his ear.

"He's my friend. His name's The Traumatizer~ He's eighty. Lots of… memories."

She gave him a long, wet kiss on the cheek.

"MWAH~ ❤️"

Then vanished into the night.

[THE TRAUMATIZER??? 😭]

[Bro got emotionally jump-scared into paralysis]

[His cringe aura is a LEVEL 10 psychic weapon]

[We need his backstory IMMEDIATELY]

└ [Already did some research, his power is basically telling his most traumatic experiences and making people cringe so bad that they feel physical and mental pain. So I'll advice y'all to either not watch this or mute in-between.]

└ [Damn, aight…]

The old man sat down next to Nightwatch.

"Cat Lady is such a good escapist…"

He whispered like a weird goblin.

"Reminds of how fast my mom left when she found out I'd been eating my Dad's ass for ten years—"

"NGHHK—SHUT UP!!"

Nightwatch screamed, body twitching like a dying fish.

But The Traumatizer leaned in closer.

"You see, didn't believe in wiping. He always lets it crust over… like a scab. I had to peel it off with my lips and swallow all the poo dandruff that came—no water…"

Nightwatch convulsed on the floor.

"NghhaaaAAAH—!"

"There was also that one time I was so broke so I had to take estrogen pills to start lactating so I could sell my milk. And when I couldn't sell it, I became a wet nurse for those lazy, irresponsible mothers…"

Nightwatch shook his head like a mad man.

"No—NO, NO, DON'T—!!"

"…their toothless mouths… the way they suckled…"

The old man slowly threw his head back and moaned as his nipples stained his shirt with milk.

Nightwatch panicked even more.

"SASHA!!! JAKE!!! GADGET GIIIIRL!!!"

But the comms were silent.

[TURN OFF THE STREAM GUYS!!]

[REPORT THE STREAM!]

[I can't breathe]

[My stomach hurts. My soul hurts. 🤮]

[The Traumatizer is now my new comfort villain]

[Cringe-based damage is now canon. Hero Agency should fear this man 😭]

[This kinda shit turns on when my mom walked in? Bye guys, no more social media for tonight ✌️]

･･･

The Traumatizer leaned into Nightwatch's ear.

"Now… let me tell you my deepest secret…"

Nightwatch's eyes shut tight.

『That… wasn't all of it…?』