How To Survive A Calamity

[Affirmative.]

"...i see."

Meta's plain affirmation was more than all i needed to know that nothing truly was within my control. But wether or not the affirmation was that of confirming all of my actions leading up until the moment i killed Nicodemus was part of the bigger plan, or what my options and new circumstances after getting branded with a Devil's Karma were, or even, perhaps both, i wasn't sure.

Right from the very beginning, the mysterious nature of Meta and the system left me uneasy. The idea that the concept of my life and existence was by the rules and laws of some other, every of my actions dictated like a predetermined move of chess, had always been weighing on me. It would be a lie for me to say i hadn't thought about it all this years.

There's nothing more terrifying than not knowing the true intentions or target and goals of another. This led one to continue to play in their palms, wether aware or completing oblivious to that fact. They held the cards and directions, while i, the pawn piece, was forced to move accordingly.

In fact, it almost didn't matter at all if i knew i was clearly being manipulated right now. As of today, Meta hadn't even been shy enough to admit my life up until now was all a series of controlled variables. I was a gear in a larger series of machination. Yet even if i knew that, what could i do about it?

Meta's boldness at openly admitting to that fact went to show how little, powerless and insignificant my opinion on that was. I didn't like it, i was never fund of being oppressed or given an ultimatum, even in my last life on earth. I hated that i was forced to act out the role and name that was giving up to me, and ended up fighting aggressively against it. But that in of itself, ironically, only went to make it all the more inevitable.

My eyes were hollow as i stared up at the ceiling, my thoughts drifting across my mind with a cold, detached indifference.

As long as i didn't know the true purpose behind my reincarnation into this world — the real intentions of the system or the one who set me up on this controlled path, i could only continue to play along. It wasn't even pretending to anymore, i had no other choice.

Meta knew that.

For now.

But my thoughts about the system or Meta has always remained the same and never changed since the beginning. Right from the beginning I've never trusted it, and i would be a fool to think that i was blessed or lucky.

The bottom line was that, the system wanted me stronger for some reason —hah, actually, with everything that's happening right now, I'm not so sure about that either anymore — and it wanted me to do so in a specific kind of manner.

I had this deep feeling that they way the system could make me stronger was the only way — the right way — i had to be my strongest.

'A variable...'

The most uncertain variable of all. Meta's words of earlier rattled like resounding chains in my head. I felt the irony in that recollection.

A variable was something uncertain and tending to deviate from normal, with diverse branches, results and outcome. Basically it had infinite and endless potential for infinite and endless things. Didn't that mean i had infinite and endless potential, then? Yet i was supposed to have hit the wall on my talent.

Maybe, maybe not. But this was exactly where the system and and its machinations came in place.

The best way for me to become the strongest of my potential — the greatest variable — was by the system. The irony of it all was all but mocking me directly in the face.

I didn't like it or want to be controlled by the unknown intent of some higher power or whatever — things like destiny, ot even fate — but only by doing so would i reach my true peak.

But it would be a big mistake on the side of whoever is behind all this if they thought i would just let myself continue to be controlled. In fact, the only reason why the chains and constraints of Meta's influence over my life felt so heavy and suffocating right mow was because of how weak i was. My powerlessness made it all seem insurmountable.

But wouldn't the shackles and constraints begin to wane the more powerful i became?

"There are a few things i don't get. How come the Academy was able to miss the Curse Mark on me despite all the tests and processess? And shouldn't i be worried about this? Even though I don't use my Ether, something tells me the Karma will only continue to integrate into my body until I'm completely consumed."

I blinked my eyes, regaining certain level of composure from my thoughts as i continued to stare expressionlessly at the ceiling. Meta's synthetic voice vibrated in its usual unsympathetic and detached manner.

[The nature of your curse mark eas hidden by the Crown's Veil Enchantment of the Ring of Solomon. And as for the matter of what to do about the Karma, there is no need to worry.]

"What?"

[If you were anyone else, perhaps having a Devil's Karma will be no different than having considering your life as already over. But in your case it's different. It is true that the Karma will only continue to integrate with your body overtime but that is it. All that would be left is what you choose to do about it.]

Meta said without bothering to elaborate more on the details, causing me to frown again. I wasn't sure what Meta was talking about, my knowledge about Curse Marks and Karma was abysmal. I didn't even know such a thing existed until a couple of minutes ago.

All i knew was that a Devil's Karma prepared the body of a target as a potential vessel for a Demon. That meant, at some point, i would completely loose all sense of myself, all traces of my existence would be erased — replaced instead by the soul of a Demon wearing my skin. I would be no different from being dead.

But Meta was saying the direct opposite of that right now.

'Is there something I'm missing somewhere? There definitely is. My knowledge about this topic is still too shallow, i need to make my own personal extensive research.' my thoughts trailed in the flash of a second.

Of course, i could always just ask Meta about more of Curse Marks and Karma, but now I've become even more conscious that there might be a couple of details conveniently filtered out by the system to forward its intent with me.

I decided to take Meta's words with a grain of salt, while throwing my own reverse spin on the interpretation.

If Meta said i didn't have to worry about the Karma, like i expectedly should, then I only had to worry about it in a completely different manner.

Maybe not of the sense that I'll have a Demon invade and take over my body...but something much worse or different.

'Meta already has Immersion to take control of my body, so what's the use of having a Karma for that purpose? Unless... I'm thinking about it from a different direction? What other functions or aspects are there in a Curse Mark? I really know next to nothing about this...'

My thoughts were spinning and my mind was racing with various speculations, my expression remaining as still and motionless on the outside as ever, however.

In the end, i made a few plausibilities and personal conjectures, but nothing concrete or certain at the moment.

Damn... sometimes i just wished i could directly see through Meta's intentions, half lies and truths. There really was nothing i could take at face value from the damned system.

My eyes flickered the next moment. 'What if i could?'

At the same time, i rose and sat up, leaning forward, in thought as a sudden realisation hit me like a bolt of lightning from above.

Maybe i couldn't see through Meta for now... but what about the system?

[There's still one more reward available to receive.]

"Huh? Oh...uh, yeah. Hold on."

Meta's words brought me out of my daring thoughts, but i simply shrugged them off, dismissing the third reward for the meantime, my thoughts quickly reverting back to my previous thought process.

Despite everything, there was actually a clear distinction between the System and Meta despite both seeming to be entirely one and the same. And maybe they truly were, but it went far more than just that.

Meta had said so herself, she wasn't a cheat or a skill, she was a Guide.

Meta was like an ai function of a device. What if that statement of it ran more literal than it seemed?

Meta's function came up the moment i unlocked the first sequence of the system. It was also at the same time that i finally had access to see my stats and skills.

What if Meta was a highly advanced Guide for the system, as she was a Guide to making me more easily adapt to the world of Aethoria. In truth, it was thanks to Meta that i had even more quickly gotten used to the world and my situation.

So Meta and the system were both one and the same, but were also distinctively set apart at the same time.

====

•[DING!]

»[Do you wish to receive the reward: 'Location of a fragment of the God-slaying spear, Goliath' now?]

»[Yes/No]

====

I stared at the new system tab that suddenly appeared, distracting me from my thoughts briefly.

My thoughts seemed to reach a pause immediately as i quickly realised the content of the third and last reward, and i couldn't do anything to stop the excitement and anticipation from reaching my eyes.

But...

"...No."

Not now at least...