NOVEL ONLINE FREE Chapter 19
Chapter 19: The Catastrophe from 10 Years Ago
Ten years ago.
When I first transmigrated, the first thing I felt upon waking was the coolness of the floor beneath me.
—Rub, rub.
‘Cool… Wait, why am I lying down?’
Two questions immediately surfaced in my mind.
First, why was I—who had been fiddling with a cracked phone—now lying on a stone floor?
Second, why was I, Esti, who had eagerly awaited this day, sprawled out on the ground like this?
Blinking in a daze, I grabbed a handful of my hair.
What I held was a cascade of silky, long silver locks.
Unfamiliar to the “me” who was male, but all too familiar to the “me” who was Esti.
A dumb sound escaped my lips.
“…Huh?”
—Knock, knock.
“Your Highness, it’s time to go.”
“Uh? Huh? W-wait a moment, I’m….”
‘What’s going on!!!? What the heck is this!? Ahhh!!!?’
Before I could even process the shock, I was whisked away by maids urging me to get moving.
Today was the day of my—“Esti Noir de Avrien’s”—tenth birthday banquet.
Thankfully, the ballroom was a bit of a walk away.
And, with my current short stride being far from the length I had as a 13-year-old boy, I had some time to piece together what had happened.
—Tap, tap.
‘…Transmigration?’
Avrien. The name of the empire in “How a Witch Survives in the Noble Academy,” the novel I had been reading.
Also the name of the empire where Esti, the girl I now inhabited, was born.
It seemed clear that I had transmigrated into the body of the third princess, who had died on her tenth birthday in the novel.
Yet, at the same time, I was reluctant to fully accept that conclusion.
‘Wait, is this really how transmigration works? Something feels off.’
I still had Esti’s memories and values intact, as if I had been living as her all along.
On the contrary, my memories as “me,” the boy, were becoming faint.
It felt more like I was a heroine in a romance fantasy novel awakening her past-life memories than a typical transmigration case.
This made me hesitant to definitively label this as transmigration.
—Rustle, rustle.
‘…But feeling uncomfortable in this dress makes it seem like I did transmigrate?’
Esti adored dresses. She wore them almost daily because people always called her cute when she did.
They were as comfortable as loungewear to her.
But I felt uncomfortable in the dress.
The fabric brushing against my thighs as I walked was ticklish and unfamiliar. I found myself wanting to change into pants.
This mismatch between my feelings and hers made me pause.
I decided to reevaluate my identity.
Was I Esti, or was I still the boy I had been?
—Tap, tap.
“Hmm, hmm…?”
Father? My siblings? I love them so much.
Skirts? Ugh, not a fan.
The fiancé I’ve been looking forward to meeting today? Ew. No thanks, I’m not into guys.
So, do I like girls? Nah, even thinking about my sisters naked doesn’t do anything for me.
After a brief yet agonizing inner debate, I reached an unsettling conclusion.
‘I’m about… 40% transmigrated…?’
Most of my identity aligned with Esti, but my past self as a boy still had a significant influence.
My gender identity, which Esti hadn’t fully established yet, leaned slightly male.
But feelings like familial love, which I had no experience with as an orphan, leaned toward Esti’s side.
In short, I was neither fully the boy I had been, nor entirely Esti.
I was… something in between.
‘What on earth…? Ugh, let’s just get through this banquet first and figure it out later!’
Resolving to live as Esti for the day, I shoved my existential crisis aside.
Overthinking was starting to give me a headache.
And—there was no more time to think.
By the time I snapped back to reality, I was already inside the ballroom.
—Murmur, murmur.
“Oh my, Her Highness looks absolutely adorable.”
“Well, it is a special day. Who wouldn’t go all out?”
“Just debuting as a debutante is exciting enough, but meeting her fiancé for the first time, too? How romantic~.”
“Eh… Ehh!?”
As soon as I entered, I was surrounded by noble ladies, who began nudging me toward one side of the room.
And then—
“So, you’re Esti?”
At the end of the crowd stood a boy with black hair and striking blue eyes.
When I saw him, my shock from earlier evaporated, replaced by a bright smile.
“…Louis!”
‘Wow, come to think of it, my fiancé is Louis?! How is the male lead I rooted for my fiancé?!’
Just recalling his name filled me with warmth.
Louis de Blézer.
He was one of the few characters in “How a Witch Survives in the Noble Academy” who treated the protagonist kindly.
The hero I wholeheartedly supported as the male lead.
In other words, meeting my ultimate favorite in person was an emotional moment.
‘I’ll definitely break off the engagement because the idea of marriage is gross… but it’s nice to meet him. Yep, you look like this? I’ll treat you like a little brother from now on!’
As my inner feelings of affection bubbled over, my smile grew radiant.
I later heard that I had worn the quintessential expression of a girl experiencing her first love.
But—my glowing smile didn’t last long.
“Und- under…”
“Hm?”
“Under-ripe…”
“………!!!!!!!!?”
‘What the hell is this idiot talking about!!!?’
My radiant smile shattered into pieces at Louis’s words, uttered in a voice on the verge of tears.
The entire room gasped, stunned by what they had just heard.
—Gasp.
“W-what did he say just now…?”
“Did he just call his fiancée under-ripe?!”
“…Huuup!!! N-no, that’s not what I meant—!”
Realizing the bombshell he’d dropped, Louis turned pale and waved his hands frantically.
But it was too late.
I couldn’t hold back anymore. I let out a lion’s roar.
‘How dare this brat, who I considered my ultimate favorite, say something like this to me!!?’
“What are you even saying, you rice cake-lookin’ little brat——!!!”
“W-what!!!?”
The instant my shout rang out, the ballroom descended into chaos.
***
The morning after the banquet was thoroughly ruined, it was decided that the event would be held again.
It was undoubtedly my fault.
And so, by lunchtime, I was already dressing for the occasion.
Since everyone had been vying to fuss over me, I’d asked for some time alone.
Now, as I slipped on my outfit, my lips curled into a mischievous grin.
—Grin.
‘Last night, while snacking on cookies, I sorted everything out. Hehe.’
The third princess, Esti, was originally supposed to die on her tenth birthday.
Her death would ignite a war of succession in the imperial family and plunge the empire into chaos.
But here I was, alive and well after my birthday had passed.
Clearly, this transmigration—or whatever it was—had changed things.
And what that meant was simple.
I was special in this world.
‘I can twist the original story. I can twist fate itself!’
With that realization, I made a bold decision.
If I was going to live in this world, I might as well become its hidden villainess.
As the princess in the light, and as the mastermind in the shadows, I would work to alter the original plot, which was hurtling toward doom.
Compared to that grand purpose, questions of whether I was a man or a woman felt trivial.
…Honestly, I made this decision because thinking about it too much made my chest feel tight. But anyway.
—Swish.
‘Alright, time to start with Louis. Let’s win him over.’
After dressing, I was about to leave my room.
But then, I caught sight of my reflection in the full-length mirror.
—Pause.
‘Hmm. My long hair doesn’t suit this.’
I had dressed comfortably in a shirt and riding pants—a look encouraged after everyone told me, “Esti can do whatever she wants.”
But the image in the mirror didn’t quite work.
The waist-length hair flowing down my back clashed with the outfit.
‘It keeps getting in my mouth when I eat and takes forever to dry. Should I just cut it?’
The thought was impulsive, but it quickly grew tempting.
‘Yeah. Let’s cut it short, like a neat bob. That’ll be nice.’
—Snip, snip.
Esti had always found her long hair a bit inconvenient, so it felt fitting to make the change.
Grabbing a letter opener, I stood in front of the mirror and began to cut.
Twenty minutes later…
—Stare.
I had a choppy, uneven pixie cut that looked like a rat had chewed on it.
‘Wow. This is a total disaster.’
I had thought cutting it tied up would create a clean bob.
But the uneven ends made it look strange, and in my attempt to “fix” it, I’d only made it worse.
To top it off, the high-quality letter opener had dulled midway through, making things even messier.
‘Well, I’m still cute!’
Looking closely, it wasn’t that bad.
The short hair felt refreshing, and my face was cute enough to pull it off.
It even gave me a noble, princely vibe.
—Knock, knock.
“Your Highness, it’s time….”
“Coming~!”
In high spirits, I left my room, leaving behind a mountain of silver hair on the floor.
Surely, everyone would praise me for this bold new look.
The moment I opened the door, my thoughts changed.
—Creak.
“Your Highness, you took a while—huh… Ugh.”
—Thud.
“…Huh?”
The maids who had been waiting for me went pale as ghosts and fainted on the spot.
My heart sank.
‘Wait, what? Is cutting your own hair really that shocking?’
Later, I learned it was shocking.
Only Esti, pampered to oblivion until she turned ten, and the 13-year-old boy I had been, didn’t realize it.
At the time, unaware, I spent precious minutes desperately trying to wake the maids.
Eventually, I had no choice but to head to the ballroom alone.
On the way, I managed to make thirty more servants faint in passing.
“Your Highness… sniffle.”
—Thud.
‘This is a disaster, a total disaster…!!!’
The realization that I’d caused a colossal mess dawned on me belatedly, leaving my complexion as pale as the fainted maids.
But I couldn’t just skip the banquet that had been organized for my sake. That would cause even more trouble.
Reluctantly, I dragged my feet toward the ballroom.
And when I opened the doors—
—Creak.
“Your Highness… sniffle.”
—Thud.
‘Is it really that bad…?!’
At the sight of me, nearly 30% of the noble ladies fainted on the spot.
The rest, though managing to stay upright, were covering their mouths in shock.
Even Louis, standing at the far end of the hall, couldn’t hide his astonishment.
—Plop.
“Y-Your Highness…? What is that outfit?”
Dropping the bouquet he was holding, he rushed toward me, his expression filled with panic.
I forced an awkward smile, trying desperately to salvage the situation.
‘This might already be a disaster, but I have to fix it somehow…!!!’
“Hehe, uh… does it suit me?”
“…Excuse me?”
“I thought long hair didn’t suit me, so I cut it myself. Hehehe.”
Desperately trying to downplay it as a whimsical decision, I trembled slightly as I spoke.
…Another 20% of the ladies fainted.
“Oh, because of what he said yesterday… sniff.”
“To think, on the happiest day of her debutante ball, her birthday no less… sob.”
“How lonely she must have been, to dress like that… sob.”
—Thud. Thud. Thud.
‘Come on! It’s not that serious!!!’
As the remaining noble ladies stifled sobs and clung to each other,
Louis’s face turned a sickly gray, his eyes lifeless.
“N-no, I just wanted to apologize… I was going to say sorry….”
—Thud.
Louis, swaying unsteadily, finally fell to his knees.
“What’s all this commotion… Esti!!! Elena, take care of Esti! I’m going to see Father!”
“…Okay, Sister.”
And with my sisters rushing toward me in a panic,
The second banquet for New Esti came to an abrupt and catastrophic end.
Following the banquet’s disastrous conclusion, I was forbidden from leaving the inner palace until my hair grew back.
That took approximately three years.
“Esti, Esti… What are we going to do with our poor Esti… sniffle.”
‘It’s not that big of a deal….’
As a bonus, I became the apple of my sisters’ eyes, spoiled to no end.
My brief dive into the memories of that day snapped back to the lecture hall.
‘…But if I explain that story plainly, Louis will become the villain.’
Objectively, Louis had been the villain of that incident.
There were even whispers of his execution at the time.
Of course, thanks to my imperial shield and the groveling of Duke Blézer, Louis’s father, he was spared.
Still, if I recounted the tale without any spin, Irene’s opinion of Louis would plummet.
As always, I decided to tweak the story slightly to make it more favorable for him.
Without mentioning the whole “transmigration” thing, of course.
[On the day of my tenth birthday ball, Louis made a little slip of the tongue. It wasn’t a big deal, and I didn’t mind at all.]
[…I see.]
[But the next day, I trimmed my hair a bit myself, and everyone freaked out, saying it was because of Louis or whatever. It wasn’t like that at all.]
[You… cut your hair yourself?]
[Yeah. Anyway, it’s nothing to worry about! Louis didn’t do anything wrong!]
“……”
As I wrapped up my explanation…
—Swoosh.
“…Huh?”
Irene began touching my thigh.
I froze for a moment, completely caught off guard.
‘I-Irene? What are you doing?!’
Looking down, I saw her slim fingers gently resting on my thigh, her gaze soft yet curious.
“Um… Irene?”
She didn’t respond immediately, just kept touching my leg as if trying to confirm something.
Eventually, her voice, low and hesitant, reached me through the silence.
“…Did it hurt?”
[Hurt?]
“The haircut,” she clarified softly.