I Became The Male Lead’s Female Friend

But Rudrick’s resolve was short-lived.

 

Instead of building a relationship with Dahlia, he saw her less often, and eventually stopped seeing her altogether.

 

That was until the war broke out.

 

‘What am I going to do?’

 

The day before the war was declared, he was thinking.

 

Of course, they still don’t see each other frequently. 

 

They hadn’t seen each other much at all since the day his father was injured in a battle against monsters, and he became a duke.

 

But until now, they had been able to exchange occasional letters. He always wrote at the end of each letter,

[When will we meet again?] 

Of course, most of the promises were never kept. 

 

They were too busy to make private plans for just the two of them.

 

But it was a great comfort to him to have a promise like that…

 […So I’m going to war, and I don’t know when it will end, but I know you’ll wait for me when I get back…] 

He paused, writing the conclusion as casually as he usually did.

 

‘I wonder if this is right.’

 

As he writes, he doesn’t know when the war ends. 

 

It could take a decade or more. But to wait, for so many long days with no hope, with only that one thing to look forward to?

 “…” 

Rudrick stared down at the letter, finally crumpling it up and pulling out a fresh sheet of paper.

 […I’m going off to war, and I don’t know when I’ll be back, but I hope you’re staying well in the meantime.] 

He squeezed out the last word.

 [Stay happy!] 

Even if he’s not.

  

War did not suit him well.

 

The long, tedious marches, the attitudes of other commanders toward him as the youngest of the leaders, the nervousness of never knowing when the enemy would attack.

 

There were many reasons, but the hardest of them all was the killing.

 

In order to survive. It’s a fact of life in war. For whatever reason, I would close my eyes and see the face of a dying man, and I would have nightmares.

 “Are you okay?” 

It was the Duke of Averine who came to his aid.

 

He had met the Duke of Averine, Dahlia’s father, before, though he hadn’t seen him often because he was always busy, but he had occasionally run into him when he stopped by Averine Manor.

 

Because of that connection, the Duke had been secretly protective of him since their first meeting.

 

In truth, Rudrick found his kindness overwhelming. 

 

No matter how young he was, he wondered if he was still being treated like a child, even though he was there as a representative of the family.

 

But the Duke seemed to know better and added nonchalantly.

 “How sad Dahlia would be if you were injured. Just by looking at her face, you’ll understand a little of what I owe you.” 

He laughed softly, and Rudrick couldn’t say anything.

 

Partly because of the direct reference to Dahlia, but also because he didn’t feel bad for the Duke for caring enough to make excuses for him.

 

‘You look so much alike.’

Rudrick eventually accepted the Duke’s kindness gradually, and before long, the Duke became a gift to him.

 

The Duke was as sweet as a Dahlia. 

 

But as the head of a family, he had a strange way with words, sometimes he would scold him when he rushed in without a plan, and sometimes he would make a good suggestion first.

 

Sometimes they would come to his barracks first to reminisce about old times.

 

It was usually the Duke who did the talking and Rudrik who listened. 

 

As he listened to the Duke talk about his family, he felt a small stirring of longing that he’d been trying to keep buried.

 

‘I miss them.’

 

He longed to see Dahlia again, to see her smiling face, the one that was so prevalent in the Duke’s stories.

 

The more he thought about it, the more he wished he could go back to her: to finish the war safely, to return home with the Duke, to find security in her presence once more.

 

But his wish was not to be granted.

 “The Duke of Averine…!” 

One day, Duke Averine died.

 

The plague had taken him.

 

‘No way… no way…’

 

The other nobles were saddened. They hadn’t expected one of the Empire’s few Dukes to die in such vain. Even the Crown Prince offered his condolences.

 

But Rudrick could not believe it. He couldn’t believe that his death had happened so suddenly, and that it had been caused by the plague. 

 

That a man of such high nobility could do nothing until his illness worsened and he died.

 

People tried to convince him otherwise, but Rudrick chose to trust his instincts over their words.

 

And now he had proof.

 “There is something strange about this.” 

The possibility that the Duke’s death was a murder.

 

There was still no clear culprit, not even a straw in the wind, but Rudrick was hopeful.

 

If he kept looking for evidence, he could uncover the truth. 

 

Perhaps we’ll find the reason the Duke had to die. And when we do, we’ll find the real culprit…

 

‘I can pay him back.’

 

It wasn’t the war that mattered to Rudrick now.

 

The Empire would win the war anyway. 

 

The plague had slowed them down, but in a prolonged war, the Empire with more supplies would have the advantage, and he was right.

 

In the end, the Empire won.

 

But he didn’t return home straight away like the other knights.

 

‘Just a little more.’

 

He was busy gathering evidence.

 

In times of war, one must move with caution, and so far he hadn’t found much evidence. 

 

But now, amid a victory lap and disorganized displays, was his chance.

 

Rudrick remained on the battlefield to deal with the remaining defeated soldiers. He unleashed his men to search the area in earnest.

 

Luckily, the search went well, and just as the truth was beginning to come into view.

 

‘Just a little more…!’

 

An urgent message flew to him.

 “Duke, they say House Averine has committed treason!”  “Father!” 

Rudrick shouted as he rushed into the ducal residence.

 

Upon hearing the news, Rudrick headed north. It was too late to return to the capital and try to stop it. 

 

In an instant, things had gone from bad to irreversible.

 “The Duchess of Averine died in an accident, and Marquis Myers has since accused the Duke of treason…” “That can’t be true, that can’t be true!” 

‘What kind of man is the Duke of Averine, a man who cares more than anyone else about the safety of his family and the empire, and yet he would plot treason?’

 

‘A man who plotted treason would actually participate in the war?’

 

But the Emperor had already recognized Averine’s treason, and there was only one thing he could do.

 “What’s the matter, Rudrick?” “I need help.” 

Help from the House.

 “I’m sure there are already rumors in the North, silly rumors of Averine’s treason.” “…” “We need the help of the House. If Bouser, the third Duke of the empire, makes a formal complaint to the imperial court, the emperor will at least listen, and when he does, I’ll have proof…” “Ha…” 

But the response was not favorable.

 “You have evidence? Evidence of what?” “Well, I’ve been doing some research on my own…” “Okay, suppose you come up with something plausible. Do you think the Emperor will be convinced? The man who set up the plot himself?” “…What?” 

Rudrick’s eyes widened at the unexpected words. His father sighed tiredly.

 “You think we haven’t done anything? Especially with your mother making such a fuss, we should at least pretend we have.” “You mean…” “But we couldn’t do anything. They’re more organized than I thought.” 

Then he said something unexpected.

 “Let me ask you this, when I was injured in the previous battle against the fiends, and the Knights suffered great losses, do you know how we managed to get through that crisis?” “It was… by receiving relief money from each family and temporarily raising the tax rate of the estates…” “No, even that was ridiculously insufficient.” “…” “It was a bad year, after all, and raising the tax rate didn’t make much of a difference. We had to borrow money from elsewhere.” 

Rudrick’s mouth fell open.

 “You can’t…” “The Duke’s finances were tight at the time, and I shouldn’t have accepted the job so quickly. They said they were based in another country, but the imperial family was in control of the money.” “…” 

A sarcastic voice interrupted him.

 “Don’t you think it would have been a positive thing if Averine had supported us instead of the imperial family?” “Father!” “Rudrick Bouser.” 

His father, Duke Bouser, scowled coldly.

 “I don’t have to tell you what will happen if you help Averine in this situation, do you understand?” “…” “Family ties are important, yes, but are they more important than the survival of my family, when we could end up in the same situation as Averine?” “…” “My family is more important to me. I will not forgive anyone who threatens it.” 

‘Even if it’s you.’

 

Rudrick bit his lip hard, his clenched fists trembling slightly. 

 

After a long moment of silence, he finally spoke,

“So… let me ask you… what happened to Averine’s only daughter, Dahlia Averine?” “Well, I’ve heard she’s alive, but…” 

As soon as he heard that, Rudrick ran out the door.

 

A thousand questions raced through his mind. He should have found the evidence sooner, no, he should have gotten back to the capital sooner. 

 

If only he had known of the Duchess’s death himself and stood by her side, would things have been better?

 

Regret was all he could think of, but there was only one thing that filled his mind now, neither despair nor anger.

 

‘I must see her.’

 

With the Duke and Duchess of Averine dead, their house crumbling, and everything taken from them, Dahlia would be alone.

 

I must be there for her, alone to grieve.

 “Ah…”  

But it wasn’t long before he realized.

 

When he entered the ruined Averine mansion, when he hurried down the familiar hallway to her room.

 

When he pushed hard against the open doorway.

 “Please…” 

He was late again.

 

Suddenly, I heard Dahlia’s voice.

 “You’re too late.” “Late, huh?” 

Rudrick swept her into his arms. Her scrawny, frail body pressed against his.

 

Cold.

 

Hard, cold…

 “Next time, be a little quicker, you nearly wore me out. “I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner.” “Okay, I’ll let it slide this time, but what about next time? “I’m sorry, it’s just that I’m late again… I didn’t keep my promise…” 

Reaching out, I stroked her face.

 

She hadn’t changed much from when she was younger. She still had the same rounded forehead, the same squinty eyes, the same upturned nose, the same full lips.

 

Everything was the same. Except for one thing.

 “But just a little more…” 

The cut on her white neck, the pooling blood.

 

Hands wandered around it, clutching at thin air. It trembled uncontrollably.

 “I wish you would have waited a little longer…” 

Should I have asked her to wait?

 

If only I could have written those words, even if I was too afraid of rejection to write them in a letter, somehow, some way, and given them to you.

 

Then… would you have lived?

 

Who knows.

 

I will never know.

 

Now she’s not here.

 “…” 

Rudrick leaned down and pressed his forehead against hers. Her face was damp with tears she hadn’t managed to wipe away.

 

And yet he did not pull away from her. On the contrary, he hugged her tightly, like a person enduring the cold.

“I… I still love you,”

he mumbled.

 “I… I’m still… with you…” 

He held her like that for quite a while.

 

How many times did he hold back the breath that threatened to escape, how many times did he choke back regret, and yet he never let go of her hand?

 

He hoped, in his heart, relentlessly.

 

If only the gods would give him one more chance.

 

If he could turn back time.

 

‘I’d do anything…’