I Just Wanted to Slack Off, But I Was Forced to Become Hokage

Chapter 37: I Have Never Seen Such a Shameless Ninjutsu!

Kazuma had never expected that the old monk Chūkaku would completely disregard his status as one of the Twelve Guardian Ninja and act so decisively.

Nara Keisuke had also not expected that a B-rank Jonin would fall so easily at the hands of the Fire Temple's ninja monks. He recalled the dense barrage of red chakra fists from just now, feeling a little regretful for speed-running the combat mission too early.

'I originally thought they wouldn't fight at all, since the Fire Temple had a hand in establishing the Guardian Ninja.'

'I didn't expect them to actually fight, and for the opponent to be defeated at the speed of light!'

A perfectly good B-rank combat mission had its reward quality drop by a whole level just because of a misjudgment of the situation. Although this C-rank [Shinobi Secret Scroll] was also obtained for free, without expending a single bit of effort, Nara Keisuke still felt a painful sense of loss.

'I must learn my lesson. In the future, when a mission is triggered, I will not rashly speed-run it until the very last moment.'

'But, to be able to beat up a Jonin like swatting a fly, is this the power of the Fire Temple's "little Gundam"?'

Nara Keisuke collected himself and glanced behind him.

'A whole group of ninja Gundams, they're even more... uh.'

Just as he was marveling at the power of the Fire Temple's "Welcoming Approach: Thousand-Armed Murder" (it was actually "Wrathful Vajra"); and still weighing the pros and cons of the "Fire Temple's little Gundam" versus the "Uchiha's half-body Gundam"; Keisuke was caught off guard by the sight of a group of pale-lipped ninja monks.

After that wave of attacks, the vast majority of the monks had consumed a great deal of energy and would not be able to fire off a second round anytime soon. Nara Keisuke thought to himself, 'The consumption of this little Gundam is much greater than I imagined...'

The old clan head had probably witnessed the scene of the Fire Temple monks casting "Welcoming Approach: Thousand-Armed Murder" before and showed no interest in the group of weakened, muscular men behind them. "Chūkaku, you seem a bit abnormal today," Nara Shikano said, rubbing his chin and looking at his old friend strangely. "What on earth did that 'Keima' do to anger both gods and men, that even a good old man like you couldn't stand it?"

Hearing this, Nara Keisuke also looked at the solemn-faced Master Chūkaku. 'The Abbot was really angry just now...'

"It's Kazuma, not Keima," Master Chūkaku said coolly. "You've probably been playing too much shogi, Shikano."

"Alright, let's just say he's Kazuma," Nara Shikano said dismissively. "What did he do? You also called him a 'traitor' just now. You should know, this man is one of the Twelve Guardian Ninja, representing the authority of the Daimyo's Residence. Even I couldn't easily make a move against him."

"Kazuma was once a novice monk at the Fire Temple," Master Chūkaku said, taking a deep breath as if to calm himself. "But he once did something that extremely violated human ethics and was eventually expelled from the Fire Temple."

"How rare. Your Fire Temple actually expels people. This is the first I've heard of it." Nara Shikano was suddenly interested. "So what did Keima do?"

"Kazuma..." Master Chūkaku looked at his friend helplessly and sighed. "He desecrated the dignity of the dead."

Desecrated the dignity of the dead? The old clan head's expression turned grim. Nara Keisuke also raised an eyebrow. He felt as if he had discovered some incredible secret.

Desecrating the dignity of the dead, could it be that jutsu... No way...

Nara Keisuke called up his panel and silently opened the C-rank [Shinobi Secret Scroll] he had just gotten for free.

[Opening...]

[Contents of this C-rank Shinobi Secret Scroll: Technique]

[C-rank Technique: Corpse Demon Kiss]

[Technique Description: Secret Forbidden Jutsu]

[Technique Effect: Through kissing, connect to the chakra points in the oral cavity to absorb the target's non-elemental chakra.]

[Technique Evaluation: Mana Transfer / Wipes Mouth.JPG]

'???'

Looking at the C-rank technique that refreshed on the panel, Nara Keisuke's young soul was hit with a massive shock.

Can't we get some ninjutsu that normal, living people can accept? This is how Kazuma desecrated the dignity of the dead? Does it have to be so ghoulish?? Nara Keisuke often felt out of place in this ninja world for not being perverted enough.

"I know this question is a bit presumptuous, but I can't help but ask," Nara Shikano said with some hesitation. "It's not as if there aren't ninjutsu that involve death and corpses. This Keima, to what extent did he go?"

"I knew you would ask this question," Master Chūkaku said, his expression growing even more troubled. "Kazuma, he dug up the graves of the successive high-ranking monks of the Fire Temple."

"Ah, this..." Nara Shikano's mouth hung open, not knowing what to say. The worst case he had imagined was Kazuma using the bodies of some fellow monks as combat puppets. The result was grave-robbing. And it was the graves of their ancestors.

"Why didn't your Fire Temple execute... never mind what I asked." Nara Shikano changed the subject midway. "Does the Daimyo know about this?"

"I think the Daimyo must not know about this," Master Chūkaku said in a very euphemistic way.

"To actually recruit such a person into the Twelve Guardian Ninja!" Nara Shikano's brow furrowed tightly. "What exactly does the Daimyo want to do?"

"Allow me to remind you, Shikano," Master Chūkaku said serenely. "The Kazuma of today is highly regarded by the Daimyo, and he is also the representative of the Daimyo's faction within the Twelve Guardian Ninja."

Nara Shikano's brow furrowed even tighter. "It seems that after we return to the village, I'll have to discuss carefully with Lord Hokage about how to deal with this ninja organization..."

Although he said that, Nara Shikano knew that this matter was destined to have no resolution. In the current era, the Twelve Guardian Ninja were merely a secondary conflict. Konoha was more focused on the war movements of the other great ninja villages. 'Perhaps only after the war is over will the Third have the spare time to consider how to deal with this organization...'

Nara Shikano's gaze swept over the other Guardian Ninjas who had come to the Fire Temple. Aside from their leader Kazuma, the Fire Temple monks had not extended their attacks to the other members.

"Speaking of which, I never got a chance to ask," the old clan head said, stroking his beard. "What did these people come to the Fire Temple for?"

As soon as his voice fell, Master Chūkaku, who had been so calm just a moment ago, suddenly froze. Oops, I was too focused on Kazuma's uninvited arrival just now that I forgot to ask his purpose... my mistake, my mistake.

Fortunately, the remaining Guardian Ninjas were still present. After some questioning from Nara Shikano, they spilled the beans like peas from a bamboo tube, explaining the whole story.

"After being suppressed by you, sir, Lord Kazuma was furious..."

"He first went to find trouble with the other Konoha ninja..."

"The Fire Temple was only the last stop..."

"Kazuma's real intention wasn't to provoke a conflict between the Guardian Ninja and the Ino-Shika-Chō, but just to send some subordinates to suppress Konoha's Chunin, thereby proclaiming the Daimyo's prestige..."

Nara Shikano listened with a deep frown and directly asked the question he was most concerned about. "The other Konoha ninja, how are they now?"

One of the Guardian Ninjas said cautiously, "All I can say is... their injuries are not serious."

So they're not dead... The old clan head's brow relaxed slightly.

Nara Keisuke listened silently from the side, not knowing how to evaluate this "netherworld eccentric," Kazuma. To say he was mature, he couldn't forget the humiliation brought by the clan head. To say he was reckless, he didn't rush to the Fire Temple immediately and knew to pick on the weak. But to say he was smart... he was really a great smartass!

Nara Keisuke looked at the unconscious Kazuma, beaten to a pulp, and shook his head in disgust.

Master Chūkaku arranged for the monks to expel Kazuma and the other Guardian Ninjas from the Fire Temple grounds. At this time, Nara Shikano also took his leave. He had originally planned to slack off at the Fire Temple for another half a day and return to Kyoto to regroup with the main force after dinner. But with this turn of events, Shikano felt it was better to go back and check on Inoichi and Chōza's condition first.

Nara Keisuke followed behind the old clan head, bid farewell to the monks of the Fire Temple, and concluded his first trip there.

'If I have the chance in the future, I must come back to the Fire Temple a few more times!'

'Without the Uchiha's Mangekyo Sharingan, I can only try to develop a Gundam myself!'

'Gundams are a ninja's romance!'

Traveling at high speed, Nara Keisuke and the clan head quickly rushed back to Kyoto and regrouped with the main force. When they saw the condition of the other ninja, they both breathed a sigh of relief.

Yamanaka Inoichi and Akimichi Chōza were pale and had some minor scratches, but they were only lightly injured. In comparison, the bruised and swollen Sarutobi Asuma and Tobitake Tonbo looked much more pitiful. Among them, only Yūhi Kurenai, the sole female ninja, seemed to have escaped any harm. Might Guy's squad, still guarding the caravan, had unexpectedly escaped the ordeal.

When a stone-faced Nara Shikano asked for the reason, an indignant Akimichi Chōza roared, "They actually poisoned the food! I have never met such a shameless person!"

"And isn't that because your vigilance was too low!" Nara Shikano almost lost his composure and reprimanded them sharply. "Kyoto is not Konoha! If those Guardian Ninjas had any malicious intent, you all would have died here!"

Seeing the old clan head's anger, the ninja who had stayed in Kyoto all looked ashamed. The only one who still appeared furious was Sarutobi Asuma.

'The Twelve Guardian Ninja! Kazuma! I will remember this grudge!'

After a night of rest, the next morning, the Konoha ninja went to the Daimyo's Residence again to pick up the pre-arranged war supplies. After receiving and sealing the supplies into scrolls, the group headed towards the Kyoto gate.

Departure, and return to the village.

(Author's Notes:)

The [Corpse Demon Kiss] is from the anime-original character Fūka's ninjutsu (Episode 280). In the anime, the effect of the [Corpse Demon Kiss] is stronger; it can absorb chakra with nature transformations and then be used by the user. Considering Fūka's appearance is nearly twenty years after the time of this chapter, the rank and effects of the [Corpse Demon Kiss] have been modified to a certain extent.

Kazuma's backstory is a secondary creation based on his ninjutsu abilities. Earth Release: Reanimation Jutsu, similar to the Impure World Reincarnation. Earth Release: Soil of the Dead, a large-scale summoning of corpses.

(End of Chapter)

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