Kaguya-sama Wants Me to Surrender

"…I have something I want to ask you this afternoon."

Hearing Miss Kaguya speak in a low voice, a little embarrassed in front of him, Amamiya Natsuki was immediately taken aback.

Wait—are you really Miss Kaguya?

Whether it was a blind box mission or a horror game, Natsuki would always grit his teeth and handle it alone rather than ask for help.

What terrible disaster must have struck today to make the proud swan bow her head and seek help from a mere human?

"I'm free this afternoon." Natsuki was curious. "What do you want me to do, Kaguya-san?"

"…"

Kaguya Shinomiya's face remained cold and silent.

"Let me guess." Natsuki put his fingers together and looked serious. "Is it that the Saiyans are attacking Earth and humanity's about to be wiped out?"

"That's a problem for the Prime Minister and Cabinet to solve." Kaguya crossed her arms, her tone a little disdainful. "If the Saiyans invade, what help could you possibly offer?"

Natsuki hesitated for two seconds. "…Surrender and become their guide?"

"A disgrace to humanity."

If aliens invade, every capitalist would jump at the chance to be the guide—selling out humanity and Earth without hesitation as long as the price was right!

Natsuki continued, "Is Mount Fuji about to erupt and sink the Japanese archipelago?"

"You're overthinking it. Even if Fuji erupts, it won't sink the islands."

"I saw a tweet last night about hundreds of monkeys escaping a U.S. lab." Natsuki lowered his voice. "Is a biochemical crisis about to break out?"

"..."

"Resident Evil?"

Kaguya tilted her head, a flicker of hesitation on her pretty face—doubt about something unknown.

Natsuki was shocked. "You haven't played Resident Evil?"

"No."

"…"

A pause. "Come to think of it, you didn't seem to know much about Twitter before?"

"Um."

She really lives in a sterile bubble.

"I'm curious." Natsuki pressed his finger between his brows. "Have you ever eaten instant noodles?"

"The chef delivers prepared lunchboxes every day." Kaguya said calmly. "I have never eaten instant noodles."

Truly a sheltered life.

"Instant noodles are convenient and delicious." Natsuki said seriously. "Highly recommended."

Kaguya was silent for a moment. "…We'll talk about it sometime."

As she spoke, Natsuki's little finger twitched.

He turned to look at the classroom door and saw a girl with a bow hairpin lying by it, a smug smile playing on her lips as if she had just pulled off a prank.

"Hey~"

Natsuki returned the gesture with a finger twitch.

"Kaguya-chan, good morning." Fujiwara Chika walked in briskly, hands behind her back like a deer in morning light, curiosity shining in her eyes.

"What were you talking about? Can I join?"

Natsuki said, "I was recommending the best cup noodle flavor."

"You can't say 'best.'" Fujiwara's expression turned serious. She shook her fingers in a crisp voice, "Cup noodles can only get better, never the best. Every popular cup noodle has its fans."

"Let me tell you, I've collected eighty different cup noodle boxes." Fujiwara raised her chin proudly. "The goal? Ninety-nine flavors."

Natsuki complained, "Then summon the Flying Spaghetti Monster?"

"Of course not, the God of Cup Noodles."

"…"

Watching the two chat happily while forgetting her presence, Kaguya bit her lower lip slightly, her burgundy eyes dimming quietly.

The cancer of Earth, indeed.

The day passed quickly.

Apart from a few wandering evil spirits, nothing happened.

At 3:30 p.m., the school bell rang on time.

Packing his schoolbag, Natsuki felt a pair of eyes on him.

Looking up, he met the ice sculpture girl's gaze.

"Don't worry, I'm not leaving."

Natsuki nodded slightly.

After the classroom emptied, Kaguya stood and said, "You can go now."

Natsuki followed Kaguya downstairs and all the way to the school gate.

Kaguya walked straight to a sleek black luxury car parked in a corner and whispered, "Get in."

Natsuki complained, "You're not selling me off, are you?"

"Don't worry, human trafficking is illegal."

Sin flows in every drop of capital's blood. Profit-driven capitalists will do anything—even break laws or ethics.

Kaguya's pink lips curved slightly, contempt in her eyes as she looked down at him like a paramecium, "There are many ways to make a person sell themselves."

"…"

They walked to the car.

A blonde girl in a maid outfit bent down to open the door, impeccable manners on display. "Miss, please get in."

Natsuki looked at the blonde and felt strangely familiar.

Noticing his gaze, the maid placed her right hand on her chest and introduced herself in a foreign accent, "I am Miss Kaguya's personal maid, Smith Hasaka. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"…"

Meanwhile, Yotsuya Miko and Yurikawa Hana walked toward the school gate together.

"Hey, isn't that Natsuki-san?"

Miko raised her eyes. "I saw him."

"That's the famous Kaguya Shinomiya, right?" Hana stood on tiptoe. "Why is Natsuki riding in Kaguya's car?"

Her eyes widened as she considered, "…Could Natsuki be a kept man?"

Miko was silent.

Impossible.

How could beautiful and wealthy Kaguya-san support the idiot Natsuki? There must be another reason.

Miko pursed her lips and watched the black car drive away, then said, "Let's go, time to work."

Later that evening, Natsuki stepped on the floor a few times and asked questions while doing so.

No conversation on the way.

Half an hour later, the black car slowly stopped in front of a villa.

Natsuki followed Kaguya out and entered the villa.

"There's a dangerous ghost in this villa. It hunts and eats other evil spirits." Kaguya whispered. "Please exorcise it."

"I understand." Natsuki nodded, but doubts lingered.

Something that makes Kaguya set aside her pride and ask for help must be a dangerous evil spirit.

The villa looked abandoned, empty and deserted. Natsuki and Kaguya searched for the spirit.

Passing a floor-to-ceiling window, Kaguya suddenly stopped, biting her lip with a complicated expression.

Natsuki looked over and saw an earthbound spirit glowing faintly by the window.

Wait... how come the earthbound spirit looks like a larger version of Kaguya-san?

-End Chapter-

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