Konoha : Naruto's playground

Naruto came to as the golden rays of the setting sun began to turn pink and orange. He blearily opened his eyes to find a beautiful view of the sunset streaming through the large window set into the back wall of the Hokage's office. The deep blue sky was streaked in the warm glow of the fiery orb above; the few swirling clouds were lined by a shock of reds and yellows, the royal colours setting a calm and peaceful tone to the vista. Naruto sat up slowly, his eyes fixed on the world outside. He could see the swaying Oak trees that lined the Village far off; the sea of leaves visible from the elevated vantage point afforded by the Sandaime's room. If there was one thing that appealed to a Shinobi to become Hokage it was this. He was sure that if he had to stay in this room he would never fall tired of the experience he was currently exposed to.

It was like a Chakra Pill. Within seconds of witnessing the scene he felt his energy returning to him. He grinned broadly as a heady rush, so powerful, raced through his veins in an instant. He was connected to that thing, to that heavenly body in some way. He remembered his first vow to never become a Shinobi, his vow to forge ahead on his own power protecting himself from the evils of his harsh world with the Sun hanging over his head. He also remembered promising to forgive TenTen and the Sandaime with the Red Giant blazing over him. It was like a centre piece to him, an object that he had come to recognise as a source of warmth and hope.

He never stopped to think of the irony that when the Sun sets, the light goes out.

He jerked from his thoughts as someone coughed lightly from behind him. In an instant, he was up and crouched, ready to defend against the slightest of threats.

"Ah, Naruto-kun, I see you've finally awoken. No doubt Haruno-san will be angered by your actions."

Naruto started before looking around. He caught of flash of pink hair illuminated by the dying light streaming through the window. His mind recoiled as the pungent smell of his socks reminded him of what had happened before he'd fainted.

"Err...'Ruto...When was the last time you washed them things?"

Naruto glanced towards the door and noticed a line of people standing to attention including Anko. He shrugged lightly as he stood straight.

"Anko-nee, I just got them on this morning! I swear they were clean!"

A small crash was heard from the windowsill and Naruto whipped around just in time to see a fountain of sand fall under the ledge.

"DAMN YOU GAARA! I'M GONNA GET YOU FOR THIS!"

Sarutobi coughed into his fist again to catch the blonde's attention.

"So you know the Kazekage's youngest son? It's a good thing that you are making friends Naruto."

Naruto grunted dismissively as he raised his hands and began sealing. The Jounin in the room looked on in bewilderment as the Kyuubi's Jinchuuriki pulled off a flawless Karyuu Endan on the two socks lying in the room. One of the socks was lying next to the pink-haired Haruno's head and the ends of her silky tresses caught the flames and began to burn. Sakura yelped as she was rudely pulled from her peaceful, albeit ridiculously induced, slumber. She made a strange sound deep in her throat before letting out a high-pitched scream causing the dust in the office to rise from the bookshelves and other untouched surfaces.

"Hey, HEY! Stay where you are and I'll put it out!"

"Naruto, I don't thi-"

"Suiton: Suiryudan!"

Three of the Jounin ducked out of the way as Sakura dashed past with a Water Dragon hot on her heels. Naruto made to follow but Anko grabbed the back of his collar and heaved him back into the room as he passed her.

"Not so fast kiddo! We got a meetin' here and you're part of it!"

Naruto's eyes widened at that. What did he have to do with an obviously important gathering of the strongest Shinobi in Konoha when he was only a civilian? He raised his head as he heard Kakashi speak, his voice oddly blunt and raspy.

"Naruto, just wait and hear us out okay?"

The Uzumaki heir nodded slowly. What was up with 'Kashi? He'd never been so...so down in all the time Naruto had known him, so why was he like that now?

"Kakashi, it's a pleasure to see you on time for once, I confess that it causes me a certain amount of wonder..."

The room was silent for a few moments; the son of the White-Fang remained withdrawn.

"Heh heh, Jiji. Your joke failed!"

Anko blanched and swiped at his head but Naruto rolled out of the way and came up beside the Jounin Sensei of Team 8.

"Oh hey, bandage-Lady! How are you?"

Yuuhi Kurenai gave the 12 year old a strange look before replying with a small 'I'm fine'. Naruto glanced around the room carefully; he had no business staying here. Why was he being included in this forum?!

"As I'm sure you are curious Naruto-kun, we shall get right to the matter. Anko, you requested Naruto-kun to attend this meeting and I would like to know why."

Anko shifted slightly to the side to get a better view of her ex-student.

"Well seein' as I'm the proctor for the Second Exam, I can do what I want right?"

Sarutobi nodded his acknowledgement.

"Great! 'Cause I wanna use 'Ruto in my test!"

There was a collective intake of breath and Kakashi smacked his forehead with the heel of his palm. He should have known it would be something like that although he really couldn't blame Anko for doing it. After the success of the methods the blond Jinchuuriki had used in his team's graduation test, Anko was bound to use the skills exhibited by their young friend.

Hiruzen remained quiet for a few seconds, studying the face of the Tokubetsu Jounin he had nominated for leading the exam in the first place. It seemed as if every person who befriended Konoha's Resident Pariah became enamoured with his personality and strength of character. What the Snake-wielding Kunoichi had just pronounced was tantamount to a pledge of trust; she placed full faith in her nominee that not only was he very capable, but he also had the right mindset to take on such a responsibility. It struck the venerable leader then that some of the decisions he had been making lately were almost absurd. Naruto was a civilian; there had not been a similar case of using the skills of a one such as him for the sake of the whole since the Village had been formed. It was uncannily similar to the way the clans applied themselves when they were scattered families seeking their own military superiority with no ties to hold them together.

"And why, may I ask, would you recommend that a civilian should be included in a Shinobi's Exam?"

Anko grinned and placed her hands behind her head, her posture the very essence of confidence.

"'Cause he's awesome, that's why!"

Naruto blushed slightly from the praise and the Mitarashi winked at him. He smiled back.

"Anko, we're talking about Jounin work here! He's not even a ninja!"

"Ahh, shut up Aoba! Go play with your crows somewhere!"

Kakashi frowned at the hidden barb, linking the events from the catastrophic mission to Wave with the resentment within her statement. It wasn't like her to hold grudges like that unless it was something to do with Orochimaru, but it seemed that Shisui's injury and her own defeat had affected her far more than she let on.

"Enough! Naruto-kun, what do you say to this suggestion? Would you like to fulfil the role Anko wants you to?"

The temperature in the room dropped slightly as Naruto caught his gaze. The Sandaime's eyes were guarded and calculating. Naruto knew that he was testing him in some way, deliberately asking a question so as to elicit a response from him and gage his thoughts. White-hot anger rose in his chest for a second; he hadn't changed; he was still manipulating things behind the veil of protecting the Village. In retrospect, he probably had Konoha's best interests at heart, but he was ready to sacrifice the livelihood of a few to keep the majority happy and that was something that Naruto couldn't agree with.

But this wasn't about him, this was about Anko. She showed unshakeable faith in him, something that kept him hanging to the bare thread of sanity remaining in his mind. She didn't hold him accountable for Shisui's predicament even though it was his fault. Those grey eyes, those maddeningly collected windows to the soul that ordered people to their deaths stared back at him as he pondered the situation.

"You don't change, do you...Jiji..."

Sarutobi gasped quietly as the whispered words reached his ears. None knew the significance of that statement but he, and with a sinking feeling in his gut he realised that he had probably crossed the line for the last time. He opened his mouth to protest his case, say anything at least to rekindle the shining eyes Minato's sole heir used to look at him with. It was a source of light for him, one that he had lost due to his own folly. Naruto cut him off before he could say anything.

"Anko-nee, I'll do it if you want me to. I'll see you later."

He turned to leave, his shoulders sagging slightly as if from an added pressure, one that had been absent before the meeting. Anko stared at his back, perplexed. What just happened there?

"Naruto! I-"

The door closed with an echoing finality.

Sarutobi sighed warily. It seemed as if everything he did ended up affecting their relationship negatively. Was he to blame or was Naruto remaining in his naive mindset? He was beginning to think that it was more a case of their ideals clashing now that he'd had a taste of what being a Shinobi was really like. If there was ever a time he regretted teaching the boy some easy techniques it was now. Putting his thoughts to the side he turned back to his Subordinates.

"Alright, which of the rookie teams will be submitted this time?"

XXXXXXX

Naruto walked casually out of the door to the Hokage Tower ignoring the slight glare from the receptionist on duty. As he moved from the shadowed doorway a hand grabbed his sleeve and pulled him into the darkness.

"Oi Naruto, stay here for a bit."

Naruto cocked an eyebrow at Kankurou and Temari who were crouched in a small alcove next to the main entrance. They had their heads together as if planning something devious, but Naruto had no idea what it was they could be whispering about on a warm Konoha evening. Kankurou grabbed him in a rough headlock and pulled him down next to them.

"Listen man! Gaara's going crazy! He's playing pranks on people all over the Village and it's going to become an international incident unless we do something about it! He's the Kazekage's son for crying out loud!"

Naruto turned a curious glance on the older boy.

"Err...you're his brother right?" Kankurou nodded. "Then why the heck don't you just speak to him about it?!"

Temari blanched at the suggestion.

"Speak to him?! Are you nuts?! We tried to talk him out of pulling dad's pants down in the middle of a council before and he trapped us in his sand for the rest of the night!"

"Oh."

There was a brief, pregnant pause where Naruto attempted to visualise the two siblings cocooned in the yellow granules but suddenly what the girl had said clicked in his mind.

"Wait...HE PULLED THE KAZEKAGE'S PANTS DOWN IN THE MIDDLE OF A MEETING?!"

Both Kankurou and Temari slapped their hands over the younger blonde's mouth.

"Shhhhh! Are you trying to get us caught?!"

Naruto snickered so hard that spittle sprayed the Suna Shinobi's hands and they were forced to pull their palms away in disgust. Temari uttered a low 'Eww!' and began scrubbing the damp extremity on the hem of her lilac skirt. Kankurou rubbed his palm over Naruto's back as compensation.

"Anyway, what's he plannin'?"

The two siblings glanced at each other with a shared morbid expression before turning back to the Konoha Jinchuuriki.

"Did you see that pink-haired girl run past earlier with burnt hair and her dress all wet?"

Naruto snorted and clamped down on his tongue in an effort to silence his laughter and the brother and sister stared at him.

"Err, you had something to do with that didn't you?"

Naruto nodded jerkily. Temari sighed.

"We should have known it was something like that. You were the one to teach Gaara all of this anyway..."

Naruto shrugged and patted her on the head. She ducked out of the way but threw an arm over his shoulders and squeezed lightly.

"Hey, I'm not blaming you. It's a big improvement compared to what he used to be."

Kankurou winced at the reminder and Naruto grimaced slightly.

"Yeah I know. I know what he was like back then."

The two siblings glanced at each other hesitantly. They knew an Uzumaki Naruto had passed through their Village more than two years ago from the amount Gaara would mention him, but they never knew the actual details of his visit. Gaara's personality had taken a complete one-eighty and suddenly the capital of Wind Country had feared their resident Jinchuuriki for a totally different reason than they had before. The Village had been turned upside down by the regular pranks that seemed to affect every single member of the population. Even the Kazekage wasn't spared; in fact, their stern leader appeared to be a much more prominent target than anyone else in the Village if the number of embarrassing situations he had been placed in were anything to go by.

"Look, forget this! We have to find him before he does something stupid!"

Naruto placed his palm on his chin and pondered over the situation. If Gaara was going after the Haruno girl then that meant he was actually planning a prank on a Shinobi from an allied country. It could very well lead to a big misunderstanding at this point...

Wait. He was going after Sakura!

"I know where he is!"

Temari glanced at him, perplexed.

"You do?"

Naruto grinned widely.

"Yup!"

XXXXXXXXX

Tanukis never attacked their prey head-on. Not only was it an un-stylish way to do things, but Tanukis had to take into account that they were far smaller than the things they were usually hunting. One might scoff and say 'well then, why are they hunting things obviously bigger than themselves?' Tanukis looked at it differently though.

Bigger things were better, just like a sand-castle was far more luxurious and grander than a sand mound. If you spent time making something with all their intricacies and idiosyncrasies, you were bound to reap a far tastier fruit than one would normally expect to receive. Today's target was a ninja, a rubbish one at that since she had absolutely no idea that she was being followed and appeared to have been assaulted and beaten quite badly beforehand.

Her hair was burnt and she was soaking wet. How bad a Kunoichi did you have to be that you didn't have a defence against opposite attacks?! At least focus on one element!

But then again, nobody was really like him and so he couldn't compare his skills to anyone else. The only person remotely similar was his blond friend and that was only when it came to the details, there wasn't really anything else. Gaara frowned in consternation at his mental predicament. What was like anything anyway? Could you really say something was like something else when everything was fundamentally different? Wedgies could never be the same as say...a sand slide after all. The only thing linking them was the fact that he tended to get that funny feeling in his gut that made his sand all wobbly.

He didn't know that it was actually called 'amusement'.

Wedgie it was then.

His sand descended silently until it was hovering in a big cloud behind the pink-haired girl. He placed it in the same space as her shadow so that she wouldn't see any signs of the attack before it actually hit her. With a swipe of his hand, the golden granules seized the hem of her singed, slit skirt and pulled it over her head leaving her hanging upside down.

"GAARA!"

The red-head glanced up the road to find his brother and sister resting on their knees and panting whilst his first friend stood looking at him with a bewildered expression.

"GAARA! YOU CAN'T WEDGIE A GIRL!"

He cocked his head in thought.

"You can't?"

Temari collapsed into raucous giggles at the sight of a screaming pinkette, decrying bloody murder at her sand-induced predicament. It was lucky that she had been wearing shorts under her dress or a whole bunch of embarrassing situations would have sprung up around him. Kankurou looked on in awe with the apparent comfortableness his younger brother seemed to revel in even after doing something as ludicrous as that.

"G-Gaara...you s-should have told me you were into t-this kind of stuff! I c-could have helped you out!"

Temari cried tears of mirth at the absurd situation presented in front of her. This was just...unbelievable. Naruto glanced at Temari out of the corner of his eye and the corners of his lips twitched upwards slightly. He bit his thumb and swiped it down the side of his forearm eliciting a puff of smoke. A dull click echoed around the clearing followed by another pop; the actions so fast that no-one was able to see what he actually did. Kankurou and Temari knew enough about him by now that they simply ignored it.

"Umm...Gaara can you let her down now?"

Gaara turned to look back at his handiwork before glancing at Naruto as if for approval. Naruto cackled with glee and shook his head. Sakura's screams fell on deaf ears.

"Can we just...get out of here please? I don't want to be accused of molesting a little girl."

The pink-haired Haruno squawked indignantly as they turned-tail and jogged away. Her defeated shouts and demands to be let down followed them as they left the scene.

"What does 'molesting' mean?"

Temari broke into another fit of giggles and Naruto sniggered as Kankurou flushed with embarrassment. The pedestrians walking past stared at him funny and he began to look quite flustered. Gaara innocent expression didn't help much and Naruto wasn't sure if he was joking or not.

"Hey Naruto, you want to hang around at our place for dinner or something?"

Naruto glanced at the pig-tailed blond in shock.

"W-What?!"

Temari smiled at him encouragingly.

"Well?"

Naruto stopped dead in his tracks and the other three walked a few steps further before turning to face him.

"What's wrong?"

Naruto stared at each of them in turn.

"You sure you want me around? You're with a teacher right? I'm not exactly famous in Sand for bein' a good person."

"Huh? You're famous in Suna? Since when? I don't think I've ever heard your name unless Gaara was talking about you."

Naruto frowned at Kankurou.

"Wait so they never found out about the missin' Jutsu scrolls?"

Gaara's sand rose and fell awkwardly. A small breeze played out around them causing their clothes to rustle and Temari's hair to wave slightly.

"Baki-Sensei's gonna murder you."

Temari nodded beside her brother.

"Especially since you nabbed one of his personal scrolls too. You'd better give it back if you still have it."

Naruto blanched at her words.

"Eheheh..."

They continued walking in a companionable silence, the sun finally dropping below the horizon. As they walked towards the hotel that the Suna teams were staying, the road-lamps flickered to life around them bathing the shop-awnings and walkways in cool creams and whites. They turned off the road heading back towards the Hokage tower and ducked under the sliding doors of a fancy hotel near the centre of the Village. The foyer was a sight to behold; a giant shimmering chandelier perched precariously on a small nub of metal fixed to the ceiling. The glittering monstrosity swung perilously to each side sending a myriad of colours floating over the walls in a lattice pattern. It created an expensively mysterious atmosphere, as if the room were vastly different from the normal world just outside the glass double doors they had entered from.

At the far side of the hallway, a gleaming mahogany desk stood pushed against the wall, its varnished surface obviously smooth to the touch. They passed it on their way up towards the stairwell to the first floor. The Sand Siblings hardly glanced at the lavish decorations as if they were used to it but Naruto's head swivelled every which way, attempting to take in all the colours that seemed to jump out at him yet blend in with their surroundings with ease. He'd never seen anything quite like it; it seemed as if the visiting countries were treated very well in Konoha and it only made him angrier with the kind of life he had been forced to endure.

What kind of people treated their own like scum and others like royalty?

They passed the first floor on their way up to the Sand team's current lodgings, this time a passageway longer than it was wide, though no less deluxe. They exited onto the landing of the second floor and made their way down the hall over a lush wine-red carpet, so deep that their feet sank into the warm bristles with every step. Naruto ran his fingers along the wall; his fingertips bobbing over the small bulges and digging into the crevices of the convoluted designs carved into the wallpaper. He couldn't begin to understand the feeling that rose in his chest at that moment. It was as if his world was so completely obscure that it was like stepping into a different civilisation. The gap between his every day experiences and the one he was staring out at now were just so...different that he felt uncomfortable just being here. If his companions noticed his unease, they didn't comment on it.

Later that night when Gaara had stepped into the shower, Naruto reclined on the soft leather sofa that seemed to suck him in when he had first perched on it. It was like sitting on air. The Sand Siblings' hotel room was far more introverted than the rest of the building he had seen. The walls were a simple magnolia and the front door opened up to a moderately sized living room connected side-by-side with a kitchen. The living room was furnished sparsely; a pair of leather settees on either side of a ridged oak table. The wood was obviously waxed and polished as it shone in the bright light generated by the lamp fixed to the ceiling directly above it. There was a small pane of glass in the shape of rectangle placed in the middle of the tabletop allowing a view of what was underneath should the need arise. A small hallway led off to the bathroom and three bedrooms that the team obviously shared during their stay in the Village. Kankurou had said something about puppets before ducking into one of the bedrooms and Temari was busy clearing up the pots from their dinner.

Naruto regretted standing up as the warmth from the sofa dissipated. Sighing, he made his way to the glass door exiting to a modest balcony on the outside of the building. He pulled the door open and rested his chin against the cool metal banister bordering the protrusion.

"You okay out there?"

Naruto glanced sideways as Temari slid her arms over the railing and leaned her back against it. Naruto returned to staring out at the night lights twinkling in the dusk of the Village.

"What makes you think otherwise?"

She hummed lightly and raised her eyes to the heavens. There was a small, refreshing breeze playing through the area and it did much to relax them as they stood next to each other.

"I know it's a bit weird having dinner with people you've only just met, but me and Kankurou really wanted to do something for you after how much you helped our family. Dad's always been distant so it was a bit of a shock when Gaara suddenly stopped killing people."

Naruto continued to stare at the horizon. The second floor was quite a height from the ground and he could see a great deal of the sprawling Village laid out around him.

"I only went to Suna to see what it was like. I...I didn't really know where I was goin'..."

"Well I'm glad you did."

He looked sideways sharply to find Temari smiling at him. The edges of her mouth thinned and her grin died on her lips as she remembered something from her past.

"You said you knew what Gaara was like back then. Why did you say that?"

Naruto closed his eyes as another soft breeze reached them. The air curled around the contours of his face as he unconsciously controlled the wind for himself. Temari's eyes widened slightly as she felt his Chakra react almost instinctually. She opened her mouth to question him but he began answering her question before she could say anything.

"I saw him all alone. It reminded me of...things. I went to cheer him up and thought about teaching him how to laugh. His eyes were dead back then...I dunno why but his sand was movin' all funny like he was sad or angry about something. I remember thinking that maybe his sand moves depending on what he's feeling at the time."

Temari nodded slightly to show that she'd heard. Her attention was fixed on the blond male's face and it was making him slightly uneasy. He forged ahead to distract himself from her gaze.

"It was like...like he was in pain, ya' know? He thought I was gonna kill him, said something about someone sending me to kill him as if it happened all the time. It weirded me out! Honest!"

Temari snickered slightly at the befuddled expression that crossed his face and he stuck his tongue out at her before continuing.

"I thought he really needed to lighten up, I mean he didn't even know what a prank was! We talked for a bit and I guess I talked him into playing a prank on some guy that ran past, probably a ninja or somethin' and well...he just..."

"...He just killed him."

The blond-haired girl gasped softly. Naruto couldn't bear to see the look on her face at that moment in case she blamed him just as much as he blamed himself.

"It was so easy...so quick...like it didn't matter to him, like that guy's life didn't just disappear so quickly in that instant. Didn't he know what a person's life meant? Didn't he think about his own life? Wasn't he scared that he might end up like that?! I-"

"Shhh."

Temari placed a hand on his shoulder. His eyes had begun to quiver in their sockets and she realised then that his smiles and jokes were just a front, a cover to hide the sadness within him. In a way, he was very similar to Gaara and maybe it was that that caused her youngest brother to change so much. They were alike and yet so different that he was convinced that he too was able to change if he wanted. He began channelling his efforts into his pranks bringing about a new era of chaos to Sunagakure no Sato. He even managed to make a few friends although she was using the word very loosely. She was sure that the only person Gaara considered a 'friend' stood beside her at that moment.

She knew his unease; it wasn't unlike the quirks that appeared in veteran ANBU from the assassination missions they were forced to run at some regularity. He'd obviously seen too many things for his mind to totally comprehend and he was almost at the bursting point.

"It's getting late and we've got the first exam tomorrow. We'll see you then, ok?"

Naruto stared at her for a moment before nodding.

"I'm not in the exam. I'm not a Genin."

"What?"

Naruto spun around and moved back inside the living room.

"I'm not a Shinobi."

Temari's mouth worked up and down as she struggled to come to terms with his words.

"B-But...but you can use Chakra! You know all those techniques! How can you not be a ninja?!"

He shook his head and smiled through his bangs.

"I didn't want to be a Shinobi but...I guess I needed to protect myself."

She was left gaping at his back as he pulled open the door.

And froze.

"YOU! THE BREAKING WIND!"

Naruto's eyebrow twitched.

"Huh?"

"Baki-Sensei, wha-"

"I WILL KILL YOU AND RETRIEVE SUNA'S SECRETS FROM YOUR THIEVING HANDS!"

"Ehehehe...about that..."

"WHAT?!"

Naruto scratched the back of his neck.

"I kinda...chucked it away?"

Silence.

"Eheheheheh...err...I'll be goin' now! Bye!"

Naruto sprinted around the idle form of the Suna Jounin and escaped down the hallway. Temari could only stare at her Sensei. How would he take knowing that his pride and joy had been tossed into a waterfall because someone thought it wasn't worth anything?

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

She sighed exasperatedly as the wind-master collapsed to his knees and began crying huge tears of loss. Why was her teacher such a big drama-queen?

ZZZZZZZZ

And CUT! OK, I said I'd start the first exam this chapter but I ended up cutting it short. I know it's been a week but I've been really busy! I'm trying to write whenever I can so hopefully I'll maintain the length and time between updates for now.

I hope everyone liked this chapter as much as I did! The Chuunin Exams gets in full-swing next chapter and there'll be some more of Kakashi too! Oh, and some torture of a certain head of Torture and Interrogation! To tide you guys over until then I'll leave you with a particularly wacky idea that sprang into my head lately. And so here you have it!

ZZZZZZZZ

OMAKE: WHY KISHIMOTO HAD NARUTO NOT KILL SASUKE AT THE VALLEY OF THE END.

ZZZZZZZZ

Naruto killed Sasuke. Not just killed...he blew his head off with a Kyuubi-induced Rasengan.

Unfortunately, that didn't go over well with some people.

Sakura, having had doubts of the outcome of the battle, decided to follow her third teammate after her crush only to find his headless body soaking the granite with his blood. Screaming in fury, she pitched a Kunai at her decidedly fatigued, living teammate.

He dropped dead on the spot.

Tsunade had also foreseen something going wrong and so had followed behind the motley crew of Genin and Chuunin. Having sent her accompanying Iryounin to the injured, she'd continued on to find the pink idiot murdering her surrogate grandson.

Sakura's head was removed by a brutally placed punch.

Kakashi arrived to find his team dead causing a myriad of emotions to rise in his soul. The agony of his past rose up within him and he snapped.

Tsunade died courtesy of a straight Raikiri.

Jiraiya, on his naughty travels, witnessed the scene of his only loyal team member's untimely demise. Naturally, Kakashi departed the world of the living sleeping with the fishies.

Maito Gai found that he could not survive without his rival. Lee decided that his Sensei's suicide was a certain pervert's fault. Kabuto arrived on the scene to find that Orochimaru-Sama's dreams had been shattered and there was only a green-clad maniac crying his eyes out in the middle of a mound of bodies, strangely all headless. He toppled over with a Kunai to the back of the head.

Orochimaru decided that things were taking too long and so he'd go and retrieve Sasuke himself now that he was in his newest body for the next three years. Naturally, a certain bun-haired Kunoichi ended up without a noggin after the Kusanagi had dealt with her.

By this time the Kyuubi had finally ripped himself from the corpse of the stupidest jail he'd ever seen. He would know too since he'd lived for so long. Looking at the carnage around him he stared at the ant that reminded him of a snake that seemed to radiate a strange smell of urine. He snorted.

These pitiful humans were already killing themselves! It seemed as if he didn't need to rid the world of them after all!

Orochimaru stared in shock as the Kyuubi turned and walked away. Well, it wasn't so much as walking as it was every-step-causing-a-crater-and-an-earthquake-whenever-a-paw-or-whatever-you-call-a-chakra-construct-anyway sort of thing.

That was of course before the Akatsuki killed him for 'ruining their plans'.

And before Konoha waged war against the same group of Missing-nin for killing their leader.

Ten years later the world lamented the loss of Shinobi. Who knew it was all because of a stupid plot point that the actual author was clever enough to skip in the first place...

Figures...

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