Konoha: The Honored One

"The Akatsuki Organization?" The crowd stiffened.

Everyone exchanged glances, stunned. The infamous Akatsuki—the shadowy cabal of S-rank rogue ninjas, including the terrifying Kisame—was their culprit?

The revelation that this group, whose sights were set on the Nine Tails, had annihilated the River Ninja Village sent a shiver through the room.

"Where are they now?" Terumi Mei, the Fifth Mizukage, pressed. Despite her calm demeanor, a trace of concern edged her voice. She had heard whispers of Akatsuki's exploits. After all, Kisame had been one of their own before turning traitor.

Gojo waved her off with casual disinterest. "Oh, I don't know. Probably in hell. If you're curious, feel free to send them a postcard."

He hoisted the unconscious Six Tails Jinchūriki over his shoulder, preparing to teleport away.

"Leaving so soon? Afraid I'll miss you too much?" Terumi Mei appeared in front of him in an instant, seizing his wrist with a deceptive smile.

Gojo smirked. "You'd miss me? Oh, Mizukage, I didn't know you cared."

"Don't flatter yourself," Terumi Mei snapped, a vein visibly throbbing on her temple. "You're nothing but an irritating clown." She leaned in, her smile frosty. "Now, how about you return the Jinchūriki? Mist Village would be very grateful for your... cooperation."

"Grateful, huh?" Gojo raised a brow, tapping his chin thoughtfully. "Sure. Just send me a million bucks, and we'll call it even."

The room fell silent.

Terumi Mei's mouth twitched. Was he serious? This man had the gall to demand payment while casually holding one of their most vital assets hostage?

"You're impossible," she muttered through gritted teeth, forcing a tight-lipped smile.

"Flattery will get you nowhere," Gojo quipped, pointing a finger at her. "Listen, I did the hard part—snatched this guy right from Akatsuki's clutches. You all sat back doing absolutely nothing. And now you want to waltz in and take the credit? Not happening."

The Mist Village Anbu standing nearby bristled, their hands twitching toward their weapons.

Terumi Mei raised a hand to halt them, her lips curving into an icy grin. "Fine. Let's talk about the ninja swords instead. Samehada and the Executioner's Blade—you don't need them. Return them to the Mist Village where they belong."

Gojo tilted his head, genuinely confused for a moment. Then, realization dawned. Out of thin air, he produced the massive Samehada, its sharp, scaly surface glinting in the light.

"This?" He spun it lazily on his fingertip like a basketball. "Oh, yeah, I've been using it as a fish tank decoration. It really ties the room together. Thanks for reminding me!"

Terumi Mei's eye twitched. "Decoration? Are you joking right now?"

"Not at all." Gojo flashed her a smug grin. "Samehada's the perfect low-maintenance pet—doesn't bark, doesn't shed, and I never have to clean up after it."

Terumi Mei's hands clenched into fists at her sides. The legendary treasure of Mist Village... reduced to home decor?

"Samehada is a symbol of our village," she said through gritted teeth. "Return it, now."

Gojo shrugged. "Hey, who brought it out of your village in the first place?"

"Hoshigaki Kisame," Terumi Mei replied, her confusion briefly overriding her anger.

"Exactly!" Gojo snapped his fingers. "So, why don't you go ask him to bring it back?"

Terumi Mei's composure cracked. A wave of chakra flared around her as the ground beneath her feet began to tremble. "You're insufferable!"

The Mist Anbu tensed, unsure whether to step in or step back. The tension in the air was thick enough to cut with a kunai, but what they were witnessing felt less like a life-or-death conflict and more like... an absurd lovers' quarrel?

"Listen," Gojo continued, entirely unfazed by Terumi Mei's rising fury. "If you're that desperate to get Samehada back, I might consider it. But you'll have to give me a good shoulder massage first. I've been carrying this Jinchūriki all day, and my neck is killing me."

Terumi Mei's eyebrow twitched. "Gojo!" she hissed, her voice dripping with venom.

"Oh, so we're on a first-name basis now?" Gojo teased, his grin widening. "Does this mean we're friends?"

Terumi Mei's patience snapped. Her hands blurred through a series of seals, and a dense cloud of acidic mist began to fill the air.

"Boil Style: Skilled Mist Jutsu!"

The corrosive fog rolled toward Gojo, dissolving everything in its path. Rocks crumbled to ash within seconds, and the sharp tang of acid filled the air.

Gojo jumped clear of the mist, wrinkling his nose in mock disgust. "Geez, Mei, ever heard of breath mints? Kissing you would be a death sentence."

"Don't worry," she shot back, her voice like ice. "No one in their right mind would ever kiss you."

The Mist Anbu exchanged bewildered glances. Was this still a battle, or had they accidentally stumbled into a bizarre comedy skit?

Gojo grinned as he dusted himself off, the acid mist dissipating harmlessly around him. "You know, you're fun when you're mad. But I think it's time to wrap this up."