My Upgrades are Invincible. Rewrite

After a good haul in the dungeon and turning in the loot I was willing to turn in for cash, Tina brought me to the more middle-class area of Orario as I wanted to get some actual well-cooked food instead of the cheap stall or ration-like food I had been living on since I came here to the world of Danmachi.

"So what's your favorite type of food," I asked Tina softly as we came into a nice cafe-style restaurant and I was wearing a small smile at the restaurant's theme... Being cute animal girls in maid outfits. And the best part, with how Danmachi was a fantasy world, all those cat ears were true! Those dog ears, and massive breasts the cowgirls all had were real!

Tina hummed in thought to my question before she softly responded as we both took in the bright interior of the cafe. "I like kinda spicy food. Not too spicy as to cause pain, but just a reminder of its presence and something to keep me warm." She said with some nostalgia.

Before I could continue about what kind of drinks she liked a rabbit beastkin all but bounced over as she surprisingly wore a fairly natural and real smile as she spoke cheerfully. "Ello, Master, and Mistress, my name is Syra." The brown-haired bunny girl then laid down a couple of menu's in front of us and continued in her previous chipper voice. "Here are the menu, and do you both already know what you want to drink already?"

I looked at Tina who shook her head not knowing what she wanted, and I was the same honestly. So I shrugged helplessly before answering. "Eh, we will take the house special drink, I guess." I finished and the waitress wrote down that and told us she would be back in a couple of minutes to get our orders leaving us to peruse the menus.

After a couple of minutes of looking through the small menu and its options, I looked up to Tina who looked at the menu like it was her mortal enemy so I cautiously asked. "Tinaaa..." I drawled out to start before continuing gently. "If you say you are getting the children's serving of mac and cheese I am going to be disappointed, we are adventurers and are making some decent money so don't worry about it... As remember our gear and expenses are also secure and well taken care of." I said cryptically and she exhaled in relief nodding in understanding.

Being a part of Hephaestus's Familia came with a large number of bonuses like food being delivered if we lived in the apartments like I did, along with there being a canteen open to the Familia in the Familia mansion at all hours. Also to say nothing of the large discounts all adventurer gear gets for in-house Familia members. Though obviously that was less taken advantage of due to most members of the Hephaestus Familia meant you were a smith and thus made your own weapons and gear.

So Tina ordered a bowl of hefty spaghetti and I ended up getting myself the same when I didn't see anything else that popped up in my interest. Between eating our food I asked Tina quietly. "So does that stuff happen in the dungeon pretty often?" I asked alluding to those Zeus members fight and she grimaced and looked around as though afraid a Zeus Familia member was going to stomp in and use our heads as bowling balls.

But with no monster rushing in, she gathered a bit of courage and nodded, and like me she didn't directly mention them as we had no doubt that a level three or even a level two could hear our words spoken in this cafe with a little issue with how the sense of higher leveled adventures increased. "As I said, they have to fight for their Falna updates so yeah it's a common thing... With us moving up a floor it will be less common but they mostly stick to the first, fifth, and tenth floors to do their fighting." Tina said hushedly looking around for anyone that seemed they were paying far too much attention to us.

But everyone was just minding their business eating their food and drinking their drinks... And also obviously for the men, trying to hit on the beastkin maids.

Eventually, we finished our food, paid, and were going to leave. But as we were leaving, the doors to the cafe exploded into shrapnel as a superhuman foot moving faster than a blur that I could track had kicked the segmented sliding door into the cafe causing some of the ladies within to scream in surprise but their cries were strangled shut and silent as the sounds of heavy boots fell into the cafe as two men walked in.

One man was a giant of a man, clad in dark full plate armor with a vicious massive battle axe being held in his hand. While the other man was thinner but wore a monster leather cloak that covered most of his body but still allowed the sight and movement of his dual swords that were at his sides.

The thinner man spoke softly but crystal clear with his voice being a poisonous hiss of malignant intent that spoke directly to our fears. "Gentlemen, ladies." He started and smiled a dangerous thing as he palmed his swords." The Zeus Familia is merely taking the protection dues for this city street... I hope you all relax and sit still while we acquire the taxes this establishment owes and nothing else will happen."

A large man came out of the back kitchen and I saw he was a giant of a man and absently noticed that he was a Boaz or boar beastkin in particular. It turns out the man was actually the owner and tried to talk sense into the two Zeus Familia members but... "Gentlemen, I already paid my dues to the Guild with those fees as you well know going into your pockets." He said with the unsaid, 'I already paid so why are you causing trouble?' Being painfully obvious.

The larger man in plate armor sighed looking up at the ceiling and shook his head as the thin man's eyes glowed a sickly green before anyone could react the thin man spoke very quickly. "Sickly Ichor's Final Sleep." And then with a blur of movement, he stabbed his glowing hand forward and into the guts of the owner of the shop making the waitresses scream in horror as the thin man then purposefully ripped the owner's guts and intestines out with his hand that glowing a sickly green that matched his cold serpent-like eyes.

"Basilisk Hands what in the world are you doing!" A feminine voice snarled and from one of the tables a woman slammed her chair back so hard it exploded against the wall behind her and both men cursed seeing her standing up from the back area of the cafe. "Well, you simpletons what in the world are you doing?!" She demanded and I saw she was armed with a beautiful adamantine sword that glittered with an enchantment woven into its being while having a weird justice-like scale worked into the crossguard of the sword.

The woman had long blond hair that went past her backside and was wearing a somewhat loose shift that was of pure white with blue trim that highlighted her amazing assets. But most notable was how she was wearing a blindfold that clearly obscured her expression as she was using her sword as a walking stick as she approached the duo while the other woman she was previously sitting with back at her table looked worried.

"Sword Maiden." The thin man spat while looking at the woman not fearfully but clearly weighing his options while his bulky counterpart hefted his massive battle axe into both his hands clearly ready for battle. "Go back to your damned seat and mind your own business... Wouldn't wants to cause any drama between our Familias now would you?" He said with a poisonous smile but the now-named woman with the title Sword Maiden merely tilted her head to the side and looked down at the owner who was whimpering as he held his clearly rotting guts that glowed a poisonous green through the wound.

The Sword Maiden looked back up and towards the thin man and she spoke clearly. "Leave or I will show you the difference between a couple of fresh level fives and an experienced level six." She said bluntly with her sword glowing white in anticipation of battle.

The thin man had a bead of sweat come to his brow before he twitched and then snarled as he visibly didn't like his chances and then he shattered the wood beneath his feet as he spun on his heel and walked out of the cafe through the opening where the door should have been. A moment of silence was shared between all the cafe owners and before silent soft conversation continued while I watched that Sword Maiden get down to her knees to check the man who was still bleeding out... And having his guts rotted away by the magic wound that thin man was clearly still powering out of fucking spite.

"This cafe is probably gonna close," Tina said with a sigh as she muttered about coming between the drama between the Zeus and Hera Familia with the Zeus Familia member's ego was a death sentence nowadays.

But before we could leave, or mind our business. The Sword Maiden spoke up as her table mate joined her and I actually was able to see her beyond the just corner of my eye. Even as the Sword Maiden spoke I took in the person she shared her lunch with and saw that she was wearing a black dress that clung to her fair curves and went down past her knees. She also wore a set of emerald-embedded earrings and a necklace that matched her own green eyes and had silvery white hair quite nicely while her pale skin gave her a very delicate appearance.

"Ladies, and Gentlemen do you have any skills that can dispel hostile magic in order to save this man's life?" She questioned but everyone including Tina looked down unwilling to answer or look at her and she sighed while speaking again. "I am willing to swear on the name of Hera to make sure no retribution comes towards you for any assistance you render!" She said strongly but no one looked up from their table.

They were scared someone was going to rat and those Zeus members with their bruised egos were going to hunt them down and no one wanted to lay bleeding out slowly poisoned by some sadistic bastard.

But with everyone looking down and refusing to answer I waved slightly to get the other woman's attention who clearly wasn't blind/blindfolded. And once I got her attention I flicked my hand and a glass vial filled with a golden elixir I fused several potions and the corpse of a salamander and a starfish into that gave insane regeneration along with the properties of natural elixirs and potions that would mass produce blood and soft tissues for the body to survive the wounds adventures would so commonly get in the dungeon.

For whatever reason, potions and elixirs couldn't heal, regrow, or replace bones and ligaments at fucking all... Literally, you could be stabbed thirty-seven times in the chest with your heart pierced and all. And if you drink a powerful elixir you would be utterly fine in the course of minutes. But if you lose the tip of a finger with its joint, it didn't matter what potion or elixer you drank you were fucked.

But my Elixers weren't like that as I fused salamander and starfish into the potions giving it the ability to regrow entire limbs if they had enough elixirs and... The fat and muscles are for the elixirs to use as fuel and break down to rebuild the body beyond the magical energy used.

The woman with green eyes silently nodded understanding after she caught the elixer as she was well aware I was trying to stay anonymous while Tina sighed at my meddling. So with that little episode out of the way, the Sword Maiden sent everyone out of the cafe after that other woman whispered into her ears. Which allowed me and Tina to head home... Away from all the bullshit of Orario.