"Oops! I Stole the Isekai Lottery"

Beth Dutton woke up with a groggy headache, regretting her choices in life—mainly the one where she willingly followed a brown-skinned devil in human form.

Her regret was short-lived as Dobby, the most terrifyingly polite house-elf she had ever seen, walked in holding a silver tray with steaming tea and buttery croissants.

"Good morning, Miss Beth," Dobby said, bowing like a proper British butler. "Your morning tea and snacks are prepared, along with a personalized daily health regimen based on your bodily deficiencies."

Beth sat up groggily. "Excuse me, what?"

Dobby nodded seriously. "Dobby has also noted your affinity for whiskey, spicy food, and self-destructive tendencies. Therapy appointments can be arranged."

Beth choked on her tea.

Dobby smiled. "Miss Beth must hydrate. The whiskey dehydration from last night has left your kidneys working overtime. Also, Dobby has taken the liberty of listing your potential allergens and adjusting your meals accordingly."

Beth just stared. Was she in heaven or hell?

After two days of this nonsense, she finally asked, "Alright, what's the deal with Raja? Who the hell is he?"

Dobby perked up enthusiastically like a proud mother talking about her son. "My Lord is the future Wizard King, the Supreme Chaos Bringer, the Shadow Monarch of Business, and the Greatest Seducer of Onee-sans."

Beth's soul left her body. "What the f—"

Dobby ignored her existential crisis. "Now, Miss Beth, it is time for your evening tea party with the Queens of Business! Your attire has already been prepared."

Beth had no idea what she had gotten herself into.

Meanwhile, at Charlie Harper's beach house, things were peaceful. Too peaceful.

Charlie, Alan, and Jake were enjoying a quiet breakfast when the front door burst open.

"FATHER! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!"

Alan choked on his pancake.

Charlie froze mid-sip of coffee.

Raja stormed into the dining hall like a soap opera protagonist, tears (fake) glistening in his eyes.

"You abandoned me and Mom, only to run away with… him?!" He pointed at Alan dramatically.

Alan, confused and terrified, looked at Charlie. "WHAT?! WHO EVEN IS HE?!"

Charlie dropped his fork. "Alan, you downright seduced me."

Alan's face drained of color. "CHARLIE, WHAT THE HELL?!"

Jake blinked. "Wait… does that make me the replacement kid?"

Raja clutched his chest like he'd been stabbed. "You replaced me?! With… THIS?" He motioned vaguely at Jake, who now looked concerned for his own existence.

Alan was fully panicking. "CHARLIE, EXPLAIN TO HIM!"

Charlie just sighed dramatically. "Alan, I was weak, and you were irresistible."

Alan's soul left his body. "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!"

Berta, who had been silently watching, finally collapsed on the couch laughing so hard she wheezed.

After another five minutes of Oscar-worthy soap opera nonsense, Raja finally introduced himself.

"Relax, Alan, I'm just Charlie's adopted nephew."

Alan, finally catching his breath, muttered, "How did he adopt you."

Raja casually replied "When he was Drunk."

Alan nodding "That actually explains everything."

Later that evening, Judith arrived to pick up Jake.

Unfortunately for her, Raja answered the door.

The second he saw her, he instantly activated Maximum Sass Mode.

"Oh. It's you. The unworthy woman has arrived."

Judith's face scrunched up. "Excuse me, who the hell are you?"

"I'm Alan's new, handsome, rich boyfriend."

Alan choked on thin air.

Judith froze. "WHAT?!"

Charlie and Alan peeked from behind the doorway, watching with pure joy.

Raja smirked. "Unlike you, I appreciate Alan. I give him affection, stability, and daily oil massages."

Judith turned purple. "ALAN?! WHAT IS THIS NONSENSE?!"

Alan, fully committed to the bit now, sighed and looked dramatically at Raja. "Judith, I always thought love was just about giving. But after meeting Raja, I understand it's mutual."

Raja kissed Alan's forehead and whispered seductively, "You beautiful soul."

Judith screamed, grabbed Jake, and RAN.

Jake waved. "Bye, Raja!"

Raja grinned. "Call me Daddy."

Judith tripped, fell, and ran away faster.

Charlie, Alan, and Raja collapsed onto the floor, crying with laughter.

That night, Charlie took Raja and Alan to the bar.

A few drinks in, five sorority girls walked in.

Raja's eyes locked onto one.

Candy.

He teleported to their table (figuratively) and activated Maximum Charm Mode™.

"Ladies, the universe has conspired to bring us together. Drinks are on me."

A few drinks later, Raja casually suggested a beach party.

The girls cheered.

Charlie and Alan stared in shock at the arrangements in the house as Dobby appeared out of thin air (stealthily) and instantly transformed the house into a beachside Drinking paradise.

The party was legendary.

Raja took Candy to Rose's house and achieved his lifelong dream of a three-way with his crushes.

Meanwhile, Charlie and Alan both somehow ended up in their own three-ways. Raja may or may not have spiked their drinks with a little something to help them keep up.

The next morning, Raja officially claimed Candy as his pet, and she moved into Rose's house.

Charlie, staring at Raja in disbelief (Knowing he spiked there drinks with something), muttered, "You're either a god… or a demon."

Raja strolled into Pearson Firm like he owned the place, exuding the confidence of a man who had never lost an argument in his life—which, to be fair, was true.

Dressed in a plain white formal shirt, jeans, polished black shoes, and a Casio watch, he looked so out of place among the sea of overpriced designer suits that it was an immediate office scandal.

Mike Ross, forever the eager puppy of the firm, was the first to confront him.

"Excuse me, sir, but clients aren't allowed in this area."

Raja tilted his head, looking at him like he had just spoken in ancient Latin.

"Client? Who said I was a client?"

By now, the murmurs had begun. Lawyers peeked over their cubicles, whispering theories. Was he a billionaire in disguise? or A delivery guy who got lost?

Donna saw the commotion and froze in horror. Raja gave her a look that clearly said, "Let me have my fun."

The lawyers kept pressing him for credentials.

Rachel Zane, always ready for workplace drama, walked in and saw a crowd forming around the casually-dressed intruder. She frowned and horrified. This had "Damn! They are Fucked" written all over it.

Before she could intervene, Donna held up a hand.

"Wait. Let's see where this goes."

Raja finally ended the suspense.

"I'm your new recruit."

The office went dead silent.

Then, all at once:

"WHERE IS YOUR SUIT?!"

"WHO HIRED YOU?!"

"WHY DO YOU LOOK LIKE A COLLEGE KID WHO GOT LOST ON HIS WAY TO CLASS?!"

Raja sighed like a disappointed father.

"Look, I came here to work, not to impress anyone. Who wears a suit in an office? If courts didn't require them, I wouldn't even wear them there. Waste of fabric, honestly."

The lawyers GASPED.

Mike clutched his chest. Someone in the back dropped their coffee.

Rachel, realizing how bad this was getting, called Harvey and Litt. This was officially a national emergency.

The questioning continued.

"Where did you study law?"

Raja shrugged. "A less popular college."

More gasps.

"HOW did you get hired then?! Pearson's only takes Harvard and Stanford graduates!"

Raja smirked.

"Genius with talent for law doesn't need a fancy school certificate. I don't need some overpriced institution's name to prove I can crush you in court."

Now, the lawyers were on the verge of rioting.

Then Harvey Specter and Louis Litt arrived, looking at the situation and the Raja is in the middle.

Donna explained everything.

Harvey, on the other hand, looked amused.

Raja saw Harvey and immediately greeted him like an old drinking buddy.

"Yo! Who's Harvey here? Jessica asked me to meet him."

The lawyers collectively lost their minds.

Harvey, now entertained, smirked.

"That would be me."

Raja ignored the glaring death threats from the lawyers and walked straight to Donna and Rachel.

He took their hands, kissed them lightly, and flirted effortlessly.

"Ladies, allow me to introduce myself—Rudra D. Raja Kumara. I'd love to take you both on a date so you can see what real talent looks like outside of this overpriced law firm."

Donna and Rachel blushed despite themselves.

The lawyers were ready to throw hands.

Harvey, still smirking, said, "Even though you were recommended by Jessica, I won't ignore that insult to Harvard and Stanford. Take it back, and we'll talk about your job. If not, leave."

The lawyers grinned, waiting for Raja to surrender.

But Raja? He smiled evilly.

"Nope. I don't take it back. In fact, why don't we settle this the proper way? A mock trial—your best two proteges versus me. Loser follows the winner's orders."

Harvey, eyes gleaming with challenge, extended his hand.

"Deal."

And just like that, Pearson's biggest storm had arrived.

Donna, Rachel, and Litt all groaned in frustration.

Raja just cracked his knuckles and smiled.

"Let's dance."