Playing as a Tank

Come to think of it, I should have noticed from the moment the clear bonus selection screen was hidden in the game settings.

That was disgustingly unfriendly when it came to in-game systems.

It was somewhat tolerable when handling everything through a monitor…

But now, when I had to use my real mouth instead of a wireless mouse, and move my entire body instead of a mechanical keyboard, I couldn’t afford to endure anything.

If I wasn’t more meticulous, I would end up struggling with all sorts of hardships without even knowing my own skills properly, just like in the measurement room earlier.

Therefore, it was only natural to check if there were still undiscovered options for all skills, including [Prevention Impossible].

After quite a long time of odd behaviors like pressing or rapidly clicking on various letters, numbers, and shapes in the skill window, I finally completed tasks such as obtaining the information I needed and changing notification settings to my liking.

Seriously, shouldn’t they create a separate instruction manual to inform us that additional explanations pop up only when operated separately?

It’s not for me to say, having skipped most of the bonus selection notification windows, but still, having something is better than having nothing.

Only after checking once more to see if I had missed or forgotten anything did I make all the windows floating in the air disappear.

Once again, in the silence that filled my surroundings.

Right after that, I was enveloped by an inexplicable vagueness at the thought that this was the real beginning.

To make matters worse, more serious and weighty questions that I had been deliberately ignoring began to slowly raise their heads.

“…………”

The sound of wind seeping through the slightly open window and the subtle glow of the sunset.

The soft mattress beneath my small thighs and the relatively modest full-length mirror located right next to it.

All of this is both a game and reality.

Another reality by a different name… that I must reach out and grasp to reclaim the original reality.

Not long after, I slowly shifted my gaze toward what was fully capturing the appearance of a youthful child within itself.

The image of the child in the mirror who likewise shifted their blue gaze toward me.

Although I knew well that not even a single answer would come back, I slowly opened my mouth. Asking if this would really be okay.

Although roadmaps crafted by hand with my first playthrough experience were already prepared in my head. Asking if that would really be enough.

Clearly, in the not-too-distant future, I will be caught up in all sorts of incidents.

No, I must forcibly get involved.

To return to the original world.

Because there’s no other choice if I want to reclaim the time I’ve lived as a complete me, not as some character.

Probably, if I continue to act like an innocent child every moment going forward, it will become difficult in many ways.

My abilities, which I’ve been showing to others by forcing myself so far, need to become something that’s no longer a strain.

What I must face is a tightrope walk where a second chance doesn’t exist.

What I must live is an honest reality where a second life doesn’t exist.

I must walk the path, which I stumbled through countless times of trial and error even with an adult body, without a single error in a child’s body.

At first, I will probably spend relatively easy and peaceful days… but that’s not all.

“…It’s frustrating. It’s even more frustrating because it won’t be resolved by being frustrated.”

In the end, I reluctantly tried to think positively, telling myself it would work out somehow.

What I need to do in the future, what I can do right now.

What has already happened, what will happen in the future—I already know it all.

I forced myself to calm my anxious heart by telling myself that I just need to pick the best options.

Next, I questioned myself about what else I could do at this point.

I reprimanded myself, saying I must endure somehow, even if it seems hopeless right now.

Finally, I shifted the weight to the various incidents I would have to navigate through for numerous achievements.

After all, I’ve already experienced success once.

At the same time, I brainwashed myself into thinking it would be somewhat easier since I had lessons and insights gained through dozens or hundreds of failures.

But even so, nevertheless, I couldn’t completely erase even a sliver of the ‘possibility’ that something might go wrong with just those positive reasons.

It felt like anxiety and concern that even I hadn’t noticed would lie beneath childlike bright smiles or shallow laughter.

It seemed as if what I hadn’t even noticed at first would sprout and grow by itself, and eventually grab my ankle and trip me.

“…I never thought a game over would become a real life game over.”

For the first time, I envied a game character. Such a being that can move like a puppet without any determination or agony, and doesn’t have to fear failure.

Ah, this is really crappy. Why on earth did this happen to me?

With all sorts of overpowered abilities, with an appearance loved by everyone.

What good is it to have this priceless opportunity to experience a world that only existed in people’s fantasies, a new world that would be a dream for some…

When I, the player who is the central axis of the story, make even a slight mistake, it’s a guaranteed bad ending for this fantastic world and everything.

The moment everything I do under the name of Lua became directly connected to my real life. That’s no longer a game.

No, whether it’s a game or life, it’s no longer a type that can be enjoyed.

In addition, even if I decided to walk only the fastest and most efficient paths for those extremely personal matters. I know that path is not a bed of roses.

I already know that if I’m always extremely cautious, I might eventually get tired and collapse or give up…

For a long time, I expressed my resentment toward the entity that threw me into another world, which had not diminished even a bit until this moment.

Only after quietly reciting all the reproaches I could and wanted to make did I feel slightly relieved.

However, for some reason, another me in the mirror began to slowly whisper, selecting only extremely efficient words.

Saying I’ve indulged in enough self-pity, so now it’s time to stop wasting time.

Asking myself if there weren’t achievements that could be accomplished without having to enter dungeons, if there weren’t people downstairs with whom I could build foundations for manipulation to my liking.

Instead of answering those unbearably cold questions that I couldn’t deny or ignore, I silently turned my back.

I couldn’t face that selfish figure that had become something terribly calculating, even if only for a moment.

I had no intention of going around here and there to measure and judge people as I pleased on my first day of joining the guild.

So, thud.

I collapsed weakly onto the relatively small bed compared to the overall size of the room.

I knew I had to return to the office when Asha’s meeting with the important person ended, but my head was throbbing a bit because I had concentrated all the various concerns I had subconsciously postponed until later into today.

After that, I just blinked blankly while staring at the empty doorway, and finally fell asleep, unable to resist the eyelids that were slowly coming down.

“Oh? Did I give her the password?”

It was just as the meeting, which had lasted roughly two hours, had ended.

While operating her portable device to find out where the child she had finally let into the guild a few hours ago was, she briefly recalled upon seeing the arrival notification that was already there.

However, before she could remember about the house password, she realized the alarming fact that she hadn’t fed the child anything except a simple snack.

She hurriedly walked toward the child who was surely hungry alone in the spacious house.

So, when she entered the entrance where someone else’s shoes other than Asha’s own were placed for the first time in a very long time.

Specifically, when she arrived in front of the bedroom, which was the only room with an open door among the various rooms.

“…Well, it’s understandable that she’d be tired.”

Realizing that she would now truly be living in the same space as a genuinely warm presence, she swallowed the question mark that had filled up to her chin.

It was also much better to let the already soundly sleeping child continue sleeping than to wake her up and force her to fill her hungry stomach.

Right after that, she reluctantly took a call from the person she had seen who was stricter than anyone else, which had been continuing since the time she disappeared from the office.

“!@@#%@$!##%!”
“Alright, alright. I’m coming now.”

So, click.

She turned off even the soft fluorescent light so that the sleeping child could travel more comfortably in dreamland.

She was briefly worried about what to do if the child woke up unable to bear the hunger and looked for her, but since the child had been one who, once asleep, wouldn’t wake up for a long time for quite some time now.

As she had unintentionally made a child in the midst of a growth period hungry, she thought about feeding her full from breakfast tomorrow as she moved her footsteps back outside the house.