Possessive crush

I got off the motorcycle and looked around me with panicked eyes. I feel like I'm in a movie, when it seems that instantly time slows down, raindrops start flying from the sky, and the people next to me are walking rushing not to get wet. Furthermore, I'm the only one standing in the middle of the sidewalk, looking around and searching for the person I want to see.

The rain is getting heavier as I walk ahead, trying to spot his silhouette. I see Mike looking around on the other side, trying to find his best friend.

It's late evening, but fortunately the street is well lit by streetlights. And then my attention is caught by a red phone booth that stands on the side of the sidewalk. I see that someone is inside it. He is sitting hunched over the phone and all that is visible is his blond short hair.

My breathing speeds up, and my heart starts beating harder. I run up to the booth and fall inside, and then he lifts his head and looks into my eyes. I notice his surprised gaze. He looks at me as if I were a stranger, he doesn't trust.

- Felix," I say in a stifled voice, and then he stands up uncertainly. - Felix, I found you," I add, then I fall into his arms, hugging him so tightly that he probably couldn't breathe normally. He doesn't reciprocate my embrace, he just stands still, and I can feel him tense up.

- Are you the girl I talked to on the phone? - he asks uncertainly.

I move away from him and look into his eyes. I see a lost puppy who doesn't understand what's going on. He is frightened.

- It's me, Selena. Do you really not remember me? - I put my hand to my heart, feeling it slowly being torn into a million pieces.

- I'm sorry, but I can't remember anything from before the last years. There is a complete blank in my head.

I don't understand what's going on. A million thoughts pop up in my head, I wonder what could be the reason that Felix doesn't remember anything, that he doesn't know who I am....

Tears run down my cheeks, mixing with the raindrops that fall from my wet hair.

- We will take you to a safe place. Me and your best friend, Mike.

The boy lifts his face and looks somewhere above my head. I turn around to see what has caught his attention and notice my friend standing in the rain in front of a phone booth, watching us intently.

- Do you mean the man who is looking at us? - Felix asks.

- Yes, I mean him," I reply in a sad voice, looking at the ex-boyfriend. I am disturbed by the sight of his pale, even gray complexion, blackened eyes and chapped lips. He looks as if he is ill.

- You have to help me hide. I would rather not be caught by my parents.

- Why? Did they hurt you? - I ask in a worried voice.

The boy lowers his head and looks into my eyes with a painful gaze.

- I would rather not be locked up again in the hell I managed to get out of. I spent many months there, and I'm sure my mother will once again condemn me for disobedience, claiming it was for my good. I can't stand it a second time.

- What kind of hell are you talking about, Felix?

- About the psychiatric hospital...

*

We are in a hotel, which is located on the same street where I found Felix in a phone booth. The conditions are not satisfactory, but at this point we can't afford anything better, and we have to trudge through one night here. 

With caring eyes I look at Felix, who sits curled up on the bed, looking at one point in front of him. He is a wreck of a man. He is completely unlike the boy I fell in love with.

- You will come back to New York with us. You will stay in my house. Your parents will be happy to see you, because, like me, they are distressed about you. They know what your family is like, because you often stayed with us overnight. In my house you will not be in danger, you will be safe," Mike speaks up, looking carefully at his friend.

- Won't my parents find me there?

- You are already of age.... They can no longer have control over you," I interjected.

- They can, if not fully healthy," says Mike.

- The attending physician discharged me from the hospital at my request, claiming to see a marked improvement in my health. I spent a year in that hell, getting a cup of pills every day. Under their supervision I had to consume them, and they caused me to lose my memory. I am nineteen years old, so I managed to leave without a guardian. My parents were only informed of the decision. However, I didn't know what to do with myself. I was helpless. Like an abandoned puppy with no home. I was afraid that wherever I moved, they would find me. All night and half a day I was pacing the streets, and your phone number kept popping up in my head, so not knowing who it belonged to, I took a chance and called.

- I am grateful to the angel who watches over you that this was my number," I announce, capturing his hand. He does not take it from my grasp, but looks at me distrustfully. - Before you were taken away by your mother, we were very close. Mike and I were looking for you all this time. Your friend hired a detective.

- Grandpa did not work whatsoever," burbles the boy.

- Were you looking for me?

- Yes, because we were distressed about you. We didn't know what was happening to you. You disappeared without a trace.

Felix looks into my eyes, and I feel like hugging him tightly, however, I hardly restrain myself so as not to frighten him. Such unexpected movements are not good for a man who doesn't remember anything, especially if he has been through hell for the past months.

- You should get some sleep. You're exhausted," Mike suggests.

- Your friend will lie down next to you, and I will sleep on the couch. I'm short, so I'll be comfortable," I announce, smiling at the guys.

- If we were close, and you don't feel uncomfortable, you can lie down next to me, or I'll go to sleep on the couch, and you and Mike....

- No! - The friend immediately denies it, crossing his arms. - We are friends, but I can't sleep with Selena. What if your memories came back, and you killed me in my sleep? Secondly, I have a girlfriend in New York and I can't sleep with her best friend in the same bed.

Felix looks at me suspiciously.

- Were we in a relationship?

- Yes," I reply, sending him a gentle smile.

- You can sleep next to me. If it doesn't bother you, then it bothers me all the more," claims the boy, getting under the quilt.

I look at Mike, who shrugs his shoulders.

- I'm big, but I sleep on the couch," he announces.

I lay down next to Felix, who is lying on his back. His eyes are already closed and at this point he looks like a hurt, innocent child. I feel like hugging him again, and with difficulty I restrain myself not to do so.

I don't know how long I lie there, just staring at his face, but I can't fall asleep when I have him next to me after such a long time. I think about what he went through. It gives me no peace of mind that his parents were able to hurt their son so badly.

One thing is certain: his mother is the most toxic, selfish and emotionless person in the world. I hate this woman. She is the one who brought Felix to such a state, it is solely her fault that the boy is going through hell.

I hope the karma comes back to her.

*

I open my eyes, feeling that I am being stroked on the cheek. With a puzzled look I look at Felix, who, lying on the bed, is leaning with his elbow on the mattress, not taking his eyes off me. He looks at me with such intensity that at first I get the impression that he remembers the entire past.

- Sorry, I couldn't help myself. I felt I had to touch your face. You looked very charming," he says. I rise to a sitting position and look around the hotel room. I don't spot Mike anywhere. - He went to his parents. He wanted me to tell you to take care of me for a few hours, and he will come back here in his father's car," Felix adds, seeing that I am confused by my friend's lack of presence.

Well, yes, by motorcycle he could take only one person.

- How do you feel? - I ask, watching his face. It seems to me as if his complexion has regained its colors over these few hours.

- Much better. Thank you for finding me.

I smile slightly and embrace his hand.

- Now that you are with us, we will not let anyone hurt you, especially when it comes to your mother.

- So why did you let it happen before? Why did I end up in a psychiatric hospital?

He gasps at me. I look at him with wide-open eyes, at first unable to get the word out.

I guess he doesn't remember anything from that day, but he's right. I did nothing to help him then. He was forcefully taken away by his mother, and I just watched.

- That day I was helpless. Sorry. I had no chance to fight your mother.

- So you think you have a chance now? - His directness makes me feel stupid. Despite everything, I have to admit that he is right. I want to comfort him and assure him that he will be safe with us, but I am deceiving myself. - I would like to remember the past and know what happened. That way it would be easier for me to defend myself. I would like to know how strong the feeling was between us and whether we were happy together.... I would like to remember all the moments with my friend.... but there is a complete blank in my head. I don't remember anything except the period of my stay in the psychiatric hospital and visiting my parents. I only know that my mother is a terrible person and instills fear in me.

Tears stream into my eyes as Felix's words hit me.

- I will ask you one question... - The boy looks at me carefully. - Since you don't remember us and we are strangers to you, do you trust us even a little? Now your life will depend on us until your memory returns. Are you ready for that?

- I was ready for it the moment your phone number appeared in my thoughts. I felt that you must have been important to me, since it was the one I thought of in the first moment. I felt the same today when I longed to touch your face," he announces, making my heart grow warmer. - I trust you, but I don't trust your words when you say that you will protect me from my family. If I don't do it myself, no one will be able to help me.

He is right. This is his war, so we can only join him to help him.