Re:life with Karmic Gacha (Modern Family)

As I reached the front door of the house, I knocked on the door exactly three times before I stopped and waited. Then, Alex opened the door after waiting for exactly 5 seconds.

She scrunched her brows in confusion as she looked at me top to bottom. "Why are you in the suit?...and the hat?"

Wearing a dark blue, old school suit that was tailor made to fit my body – using my own efforts, I walked inside the house without answering Alex's questions.

"May I please meet with Mr. Dunphy and his son, Luke Dunphy?" I asked politely.

"Are you role playing?" Alex said in disbelief. Turning toward her, who was standing at my side, I said, "Yes."

Stunned, Alex rolled her eyes as she pointed to the kitchen, "They are over there."

"Thank you Milady." I replied as I tipped my hat slightly at her before walking toward the kitchen.

Alex followed me from behind to see what I had schemed. Passing the kitchen, I saw Phil standing behind a brand new bike with a Luke's sticker on it.

With an excited, but mixed with some worries on his face, Phil was explaining to Claire about his endeavour in getting the bike back from a 7 foot tall, tattooed man who could kill a bear with his bare hands. But, Claire didn't believe Phil's story. Not even one bit.

"So. You walked up to the guy in the bar, demanded he give the bike back, and even then he left your body intact so that you can still return home?" Claire asked sarcastically.

"Yes. Turns out, I just needed to talk to him…man to man…Even a tough guy needs someone to share with sometimes." Phil said braggingly. As I walked into the room, my attire quickly caught Phil and Claire's attention.

"Sherlock?" Phil muttered with widened eyes.

"Yes. Edward Sherlock Newgate, at your service. I came here to solve the mystery of the missing bike." I replied.

Claire turned her face away from Phil as she couldn't hold back her laugh. Only after collecting herself did she dare to turn back towards me wearing a serious face.

"Oh Mr Sherlock, I was waiting for you to arrive." Claire said as she got into character. We shook hands as if we had never met with each other before, making Phil wary and Alex's jaw drop in disbelief.

"You're on it too?" Alex asked Claire, flabbergasted by the entire situation. "Can anyone tell me what is going on?"

Turning toward Alex for the second time, I smirked at her timing and said, "What else? I came here to solve the case, and reveal to you the true culprit who stole Luke's bike."

[Phil's commentary.]

Kitchen counter interview.

"Deep down. I know that something is wrong." Phil muttered in concern as he thought about the entire situation. He leaned forward and put both of his arms on the kitchen counter.

"However, I am both…scared and excited to see where this is going to go." Phil confessed.

He looked right into the camera and said challengingly, "For every Sherlock. There is a Moriarity. I had cleaned up ALL the traces.. Let's see if you can catch me."

[Commentary ends.]

"Before we get started, let's wait for the main character of the story first shall we?" I said.

"Main character? Who?" Alex asked.

Turning to Alex, I said in a fake British accent, "My dear Watson, of course the main character is the bike owner. Are you feeling unwell today?"

Phil laughed and said, "Hahaha..Watson…By the way, your accent is great. You sound like a real Londoner..."

Claire narrowed her eyes at Phil and said, "It's not great at all..."

"Tch. Non-believer." I clicked my tongue at Claire and took off my hat. "Anyway, where is Luke?" I asked as I looked around.

"He's upstairs. I will call him." Claire said and walked to the stairs before shouting from below. "LUUUUKEEE!"

"Why did she even have to go over there? She could just shout from here." Alex said in dissatisfaction.

"Maybe she wants to protect our ears." I replied as I sat on the sofa. "Watson, a cup of tea please."

Alex rolled her eyes, but then she said, "Earl grey or Chamomile? We only have those two."

"I was only joking, but if you were fine with it…Earl grey please." I requested politely from Alex. She nodded and went to the kitchen to make the tea without saying much.

"Hey Edward…" Phil leaned toward me, trying to say something to me in private, but Claire had already returned by that time and caught him in the act.

Shaking her finger at Phil as she walked into the living room, Claire said, "No-No. Wait for everyone to be here."

Phil sighed and pulled his pants upwards. "I wasn't going to say anything."

"Sure you don't." Claire said in distrust.

"Why are you calling me?" The main character, Luke, finally appeared holding his BB gun on one hand and a walkie talkie on his other hand.

"Why are you carrying that gun again?" Claire shook her head in frustration and snatched the gun from Luke's hand.

"Hey. Give me back! I need it if I want to go and search for my bike."

Alex interjected from afar, "You mean the bike beside Dad?"

Luke turned to where Alex directed him to, and widened his eyes as he saw the bike near Phil. He ran quickly towards his dad, where Phil was crouching down and readied himself for an embrace as he thought Luke was going to hug him. But I stood up and stopped him before he managed to do it.

"Not so fast Luke." I said as I caught Luke from behind.

"Hey. That's my hard earned respect! Why did you stop him?" Phil asked with a lowered spirit.

He expected justification for his actions. And if Luke did hug him, then he could skip past his ruse of buying a new bike for Luke, and whatever 'crime' he committed, Claire would still turn a blind eye at him.

"Does Hard Earned mean going back to the store and buying a new bike to replace the one you lost? 'cause if that's the meaning, then I have really done you wrong." I said calmly.

"Wha-? No. I got the bike back." Phil lied with an anxious voice.

Channelling my inner Sherlock, I said, "Phil. The sticker is the wrong size. I printed it in A3. The one stuck on the bike is in A4 size. Not to mention you stuck it upside down."

Turning his eyes to the bike, Phil finally realised what he had done wrong. "I-I mean." Stuttering, he tried to explain himself.

"God Phil. I really hope that you can return that bike." Claire interjected.

[Phil's commentary]

"Soo…Moriarty is exposed…" Phil confessed.

He sighed and said, "I already threw the receipt away to cover up my tracks…I don't think that the store will allow me to return it…Not to mention I had already stuck a sticker on it."

[commentary ends.]

As I released Luke who immediately ran to his dad saying, "But…my bike is missing…So, this can be my new bike…right dad?" while flashing his puppy dog eyes.

I could see that Phil was torn about the matter. Before I could interject myself, my dear Watson came to help at the perfect time.

"So…that's it?" Alex asked while walking toward me with a cup of tea in her hand. "Did you come here just to expose my dad?"

"Au contraire." I replied as I took the tea using my two hands. "I came here to solve the case of the missing bike in its entirety, not to unearth what Phil had done."

"Wait…did you find the bike?" Phil widened his eyes in realisation, and then he exclaimed in a raised voice, "Were you the one who snatched the bike away from me at the hot dog stand?!"

Claire, Luke and I responded at almost the same time.

"You were getting a hot dog without me?" Luke asked in a sad voice.

"Phil, did you leave the bike unattended while you were buying the hot dog? And it got stolen again?" Claire asked in disbelief, finally piecing all the clues together.

"No…You were eating a hot dog? Was it delicious?" I asked.

Phil turned to me and said, "No. The hot dog fell on the ground. I couldn't even taste it." He turned to Luke and said, "I couldn't eat it, so it didn't really count." Lastly, he turned to Claire, "I told you got it from the bar."

With widened eyes, Claire exclaimed, "That part was true?!!"

"Of course it's true Claire." Phil said in exasperation, then he met my eyes. "Tha-that's the truth…right?"

"Why are you asking him?" Claire asked in frustration.

While still smiling, I said, "Some of it is true. Phil did find the bike near a bar, but he didn't talk to anyone about getting it. I assume he used the spare key to unlock the bike and rode it away, am I right?"

Alex was confused, so she asked, "Why would the bike thief… locked the bike using the same lock in the first place?" She then turned to Luke with suspicion.

"Uhh…He reached into…Uhhh….my pockets and got my key before he ran away with the bike…!" Luke replied anxiously.

"Luke, What is going on?" Phil asked.

"Uhh…" Luke stammered to find the words, so Phil turned to me, "Sherlock, what is going on?"

"Simple actually. Luke gave his bike willingly to his friend Reuben…you know, the 7 foot tattooed man that Phil demanded the bike from…So that Reuben could keep the bike for a few days while Luke manipulated my sympathy for me to help him revamp his old bike."

"NO!" Luke shouted with teary eyes after his scheme was revealed.

"Luke!" Phil turned toward Luke in disbelief while Claire shook her head in disapproval.

"If we go to Reuban's house, I'm sure that we shall find the stickers I gave Luke this afternoon… as he had used the stickers to bribe his friend into becoming his accomplice." I added.

"Well..that doesn't matter now anyway. The bike is really gone. Someone stole it from me." Phil said to protect Luke from the consequences of his actions as usual.

Although it seemed like a nice picture –a father protecting his son from his mistakes, in the end, Luke grew up to be too dependent on his parents. He never tried hard in anything because he knew his parents would always be at his back– ready to bail him out, nor would they punish him if he screwed up.

Sometimes, too much unconditional love could be bad for the children. It wasn't until he was on his last option while studying at a community college that Luke managed to change. He finally tapped into his potential and managed to apply for a true college based on his own merits.

"Yeah. So…this will be my new bike now." Luke said in excitement as he stood next to the bike Phil bought while hiding behind his dad's protection. No guilt, no hesitation, nothing of the sorts.

"Wait, are we going to brush off the fact that one of Luke's friends is a grown man?" Alex asked in confusion.

Claire held Alex's shoulder and explained, "No. Reuben is a wimpy kid from Luke's class. He's even smaller than Luke."

Phil scratched his cheeks in embarrassment before I continued speaking, "The story is just starting Phil. The bike…isn't lost just yet."

"What?" Phil turned to me with a face full of excitement.

"Let's talk about what happened, after you stole the bike from Reuban." I said and took a sip of the tea.

"While panicking, Reuben ran to the Dunphy's house to tell Luke that the bike was stolen. But before that, he told his friend Leon about the entire deal."

"Reuben was running to Luke, while Leon…Leon did something else. Leon followed the bike thief to a hot dog stand before snatching the bike away while the bike thief was distracted by the hot dogs."

"Ahh…So the bike is with Leon?" Phil asked in understanding. Shaking my finger at him, I said, "No. Leon only had the bike for 5 minutes before it changed owners once more."

"Ugh. My head hurts!" Luke scratched his head while thinking about the story. "Who has the bike now?"

"A man who went to buy some paint." I said and pointed to myself. "Me."

"""Ahhhh…""" Alex, Phil and Luke exclaimed in realisation.

"Don't you mean a boy?" Claire asked teasingly.

"Let's settle on a young, handsome man." I replied to Claire.

"How did you get the bike?" Alex asked.

"My dear Watson, it seems that fate wanted to expose Luke's scheme as it made Leon drive right into me after I got out of the hardware store. Serendipitous isn't it?"

Alex smiled and said, "It really is."

"What -tous now?" Phil asked.

"Serendipitous. Means, a happy coincidence." Alex explained to her father.

"So the bike isn't lost?" Luke asked.

"Yup. But…you did a really bad thing Luke. Until you make up for your actions, I will keep the new bike with me, and also keep your old ones too."

"WHAT?! YOU CAN'T DO THAT!" Luke shouted in outrage!

"Eddy…Luke didn't mean it…" Phil spoke up to help his son to try and ease me into giving back the bike.

"Nah. He knew exactly what he was doing." Alex backed me up.

"Yeah Phil, I already agreed on Edward's plan. Luke, until you work hard to get back your bike, no one will help you get it back from Edward." Claire explained clearly. "You can start by doing chores, or finishing your paper route to repay your dad's money. He had to buy 2 bikes today because of your lie."

Turning to Phil, Claire said, "You should go and return the bike back."

"Claire, don't you think that this is too much?"

"No Phil. This wasn't at the level of a simple lie. He knowingly manipulated us. There needs to be a fair repercussion for it." Claire said sternly.

Although Claire was playing the role of a stern mother right now, I knew that in 2 or 3 days her heart would soften and she would try to get the bike for Luke. Therefore, I needed to be the one who would make sure Luke learned from this matter.

"Luke. I am not your parents. I won't be like your mom that will coddle you, or your simple dad that will forget about this whole matter as soon as he wakes up tomorrow. I will check if you did your chores…" I said and stressed the next part, "...on your own…You need to learn some accountability. I won't give you back the bike, nor will I continue revamping it. Am I being clear?"

"But…that's my bike!" Luke said.

While smirking, I wore my hat back and said mischievously, "No. The bike…was stolen right?"

Luke was stunned and Alex laughed at Luke's misery.

[Phil and Claire's commentary]

Claire started by saying, "Edward had to sit Phil down to explain to him what he was doing. Well…I love my son. But Edward was right, Luke needs to learn to take some accountability."

Phil sighed and said, "Not only did Edward expose me, he also took away my role as a dad."

Claire turned to Phil and whispered, "That's because you never punish Luke."

[Commentary ends]

"Alex will be my eyes and ears in this house. She will report to me what you do, and what you don't do. In this room, I know that she will be the fairest out of all of you in her reports to me." I said and patted Alex's shoulder.

"What's in it for me?" Alex asked.

"Err…The chance to be a good big sister?" I answered.

She narrowed her eyes at me and before she could say anything, I replied, "A custom made frame for your glasses, by my own design?"

With her mouth half opened, Alex paused to think before she said, "No. I want to take part in your invention."

"You really want to ask for something that already has your name inside of it?" I asked in confusion.

"Wait- You're considering me?"

"You don't want to?"

"Of course…I want to. But, I don't want to make you feel pressured to get me into it…" Alex confessed.

Although she had been badgering me to start the invention, her actions didn't stem from her interest in getting the credit. However, it was because academic validation was all she had. She wasn't pretty or likeable as her sister – that was what she thought.

"No. Not at all." I answered simply while smiling at her. "It'll be fun to do it together."

"Okay… the glasses then." Alex replied with a bright smile. Her rectangular glasses made her seem really nerdy, and I wanted to change her glasses frame since the day I met her. Now, I finally have a chance to do so.

Turning to the family, I said, "Now that the case is settled, and the culprit is punished, I will be going back home now."

"Wait, Ed, do you want to have dinner with us?" Claire asked.

Shaking my head slightly, I said, "It's okay Claire. I already have plans for dinner with my girlfriend. I need to go home now to cook. Maybe some other time."

"A date?" Alex teased.

"Yeah." I replied casually and waved goodbye to the family. Luke exploded once I passed through the front door. "That's my bike!!!!!!!!!!!!"

…

After finishing the episode which had greatly diverted from its original route, I changed my clothes to a simple grey cotton tee shirt. Putting my apron on, I took out 2 New York cut steaks that weigh one pound each, and have a thickness of 1 and a quarter inch.

"You know, you could come after I have finished cooking." I muttered to the girl who's sitting on the kitchen island while batting her eyes at me.

Abby said, "I love watching you cook. Can't I just enjoy my dinner show in peace?"

"Okay then." With a smile on, I put on a show for Abby. After I pat dry the steak and season it with pepper and salt, I preheat the pan using medium heat and brush the pan with half a tablespoon of oil.

While waiting for the pan to heat up, I took out the appetisers – bacon wrapped jalapeno poppers from the oven. After arranging them neatly on the plate, I served it in front of Abby.

"Here. You can get started on the appetisers first while waiting for the steaks. Be careful, it's still hot."

Her eyes brightened in anticipation and she grabbed one popper with her fingers without thinking. "Ouch." She exclaimed in pain and put the popper down again. "Told you." I said and grabbed her hurting finger before I gently blew on it.

"S-Stop seducing me and get back to cooking already." Abby said while blushing.

When the pan heat had reached the optimum temperature, I started searing the steaks. As I proceed to sear each side 3-4 minutes until a brown crust has formed, then I used tongs to turn steaks on their sides and sear the edges for 1 minutes each.

Once I did that, I added butter and aromatics – melted in butter with quartered garlic cloves and rosemary sprigs. Tilted pan to spoon garlic butter over steaks and cook.

"How do you like your steaks?" I asked while still spooning the garlic butter over steaks.

"Medium rare." Abby replied. "We like the same level then." I said and took the meat temperature before I stabbed the tip into the steak.

As the temperature of the meat would still rise while it rested, I waited for the internal temperature of the meat to reach 145 Fahrenheit before removing the steak. It would rise around 5 to 10 degrees more while it rested, and the meat would be medium rare then.

"How's the poppers?" I asked Abby as I saw she had been eating the appetisers while she waited.

"It's really great. I can't stop eating it." Abby replied.

Flattered by her compliments and reactions, I said, "Wait a minute. I will set the table."

We had a romantic dinner by the candlelight table and paired the meat with some red wine I had snatched from my dad's liquor cabinet.

"How's your day?" I asked while I helped Abby cut her steak. She could do it herself, but I wanted to do it for her.

"Well…Haley talks a lot… We went to the mall and then…"

After dinner, we went to my room and locked the door. While we were making out and me getting to second base, my phone suddenly vibrated. Abby stopped and I took out my phone to check the notification.

"Oh, it's from Taylor." I muttered as I read the text. Abby got jealous and snatched the phone from my hand. "Do you want to reply to a text from another girl, or do you want to continue making out with me?"

"Don't be jealous. She only wanted to ask when I will be free to get together. We need to prepare for the concert after all."

Abby blushed in embarrassment and said, "You-you can text her then."

I threw the phone to the side and said, "No. I want to focus on you now." Then, we continued making out before Abby had to get home.