RWBY: I Need to Cheat on My Girlfriend

*Growling sounds*

I'm dead. In front of me stands what appears to be a werewolf: a large black-furred wolf standing on two legs, with glowing red eyes, claws, and fangs as sharp as blades. Its body is covered with white bone patterns. I'll call it Monstro for now, as I'm not sure what it is. But that doesn't matter right now.

I focus. "This cannot become an emotional level." My next actions will determine whether I live or not.

I need an attack plan.

The werewolf moves quickly and lunges at me.

I take my stance. "First, distract the subject." Using one of my supplies, I throw a package at its face in a calculated move.

It's not fast enough, and the monster dodges the projectile. No matter, I wasn't aiming to hit it. The package only momentarily blocks its vision, but it goads it into making a blind strike.

I block its blow with my left arm and deflect it downward, creating a direct path for a counterattack.

I tense my muscles for what's to come. "Cross punch to the cheek." With precision, I throw a direct punch with my right fist to the monster's cheek. The impact resonates and makes its head shake violently.

The monster staggers. I can't miss this chance. "Unbalance." I deliver a double strike with the open palm to the sides of its head. The force of the impact damages its inner ear, compromising its balance. The monster wobbles, struggling to stay on its feet.

It's stunned, so it will attempt a desperate blow.

It raises its right claw and performs a horizontal strike with devastating force. The claw slices through the air, seeking impact. "Employ elbow block and strike the torso." Quickly, I block its claw with my elbow and counter with an elbow hook to the torso.

The monster doesn't yield, attempting a lateral scratch, but its coordination is compromised. The move is inaccurate and fails. With a swift motion, I dodge its attack and move in to deliver an elbow strike to the werewolf's jaw. The impact is strong and precise.

I must not let it recover. "Next, fracture it." Following up with a solid left punch, I fracture its jaw with a dry crack. The monster moans in pain, unable to move its jaw. The pain prevents it from responding.

I have free reign to do as I please.

"Break the injured ribs." With a double hook to the torso, I break the remaining ribs. Each punch resonates with a crack indicating additional fractures.

"Traumatize the solar plexus." A direct hit to the solar plexus causes devastating pain. The wolf arches, and its breathing becomes labored.

"Dislocate the jaw completely." A final blow, charged with all my strength, dislocates its jaw completely. The jaw shifts grotesquely, unable to return to place.

And to finish, "Kick to the diaphragm." The kick drops it, causing the wolf to fall to the ground with a grimace of agony.

In summary: tinnitus in the ears, fractured jaw, three cracked ribs, four broken ribs, diaphragm hemorrhage.

Physical recovery: 6 weeks.

Psychological recovery: 6 months.

Growling ability neutralized.

Yes, that's a great action plan.

….

If only I knew how to fight...

What did you think? Did I do all that? Pay attention! I said it has claws. How am I supposed to block claws with my arm?

«Back to Reality»

I better hope this works. I use my 'Instinct Scratch' ability on the monster just as it turns, startled by the itch. I throw my food package; of course, it didn't go very far, but I knew that. I run away and, with some luck, the monster will eat the food ration instead of me.

A shoe falls off

Don't stop, just keep running. The shoe now belongs to the monster.

People say running away from your problems isn't the solution; to them, I say screw off. I'm sure they've never had to face a werewolf.

I keep running, hoping I've lost it. Without stopping, I briefly turn my face to see what I feared most: the damn monster didn't even notice the food and is closing in at an alarming speed.

This is useless; a human can't outrun a wolf, and this monster is much faster than a wolf. It has a much larger body than mine. I try to run between the trees, hoping to delay it… Obviously, that didn't work. It's cutting through them like paper. At this point, there's only one thing to do…

"HELP!!!!" I scream, desperate for help.

*A heavy thud*

Sympathized with by some divine being, not the orb, I'm sure of that. The evil version of Remus Lupin is thrown against the trees at high speed"

Relax, sweetie. Your hero has arrived." I open my eyes wide to see a striking beauty: her long, wavy hair is a golden blonde that shines with hints of light. Her eyes are a deep blue. Her face has delicate features, with high, defined cheekbones and a softly sculpted chin. She's wearing a camouflage-style hat. She sports a red and blue checkered bikini that highlights her slim, toned figure. Over the bikini, she wears an olive green military-style jacket, hanging open and loose over her shoulders.

It's obvious she's an anime character; no one dresses like that unless they're an anime character. Which one? I don't care at the moment.

Both the woman and the monster launch into battle… It's an incredible fight, full of elaborate moves and flashy gestures. I'm at a loss for words to describe this fierce battle! I deeply pity any unfortunate soul who can't witness this. OH MY GOD, WHAT WAS THAT MOVE!!!

* An epic battle later*

Currently, I'm lying on the ground again, looking at what I'm sure is an idiotic expression at my savior. She approaches with a firm and steady step. She's the most beautiful woman ever created, or maybe my judgment is skewed because she saved my ass. Think quickly and don't say anything stupid.

She leans slightly towards me and says, "Are you alright, dear?"

This is my moment. "I lost my shoe…"

She rolls her eyes and gives a soft smile. "Of course, boys and their shoes. Come on, get up. Let's check to make sure you're not hurt, and if there's time, we'll look for your shoe." She takes my hand and helps me up.

I nailed it. That, without a doubt, is the best line ever. I still don't understand why she hasn't fallen to her knees in awe of my undeniable charm.

My savior uses her hands to touch and check my body very intimately for injuries. Head, neck, butt, torso, back, butt, my arms, my legs, butt... this is getting very personal. And how could I forget my posterior areas.

"AH!" I think she just grabbed my butt.

She responds with a bold smile, "OOPS! Sorry, it's standard procedure."

"Sure, no problem…" Obviously, there's something wrong with this person. I think she's trying to rob me. Ha! Too bad for you, if that's the case, I have nothing but two food rations… no, wait, I don't have them. I left them when I ran away. A small insignificant detail I forgot to mention: I don't have an inventory. So if I have nothing…

"HELLO!" My savior and potential provision thief looks at me with a confused expression.

"Ah! Sorry, were you saying something?"

"I said, are you okay? You have no injuries and there are no more grimms in the area, so I guess we can look for your shoe," she says, expecting me to lead the way to my great treasure.

"Thanks, miss...?"

"Aria. Aria Dawn."

"Right, Aria." I set out on the mission to find my treasure and not waste any more of her time. We start walking to where I ran from. I didn't get far, so it shouldn't take long.

… ….

… …. ….

I hate awkward silences. "So, what's a woman like you doing in the middle of the forest?" I ask, trying to break the ice.

She looks at me surprised by what I just said. She raises an eyebrow, puzzled, and says, "Me? What are you doing in the middle of the forest? Why are you alone?"

"I was kidnapped by a cosmic orb and left in this forest to be the entertainment for some god because it's an idiot." I tell the truth, no point in hiding it...

She looks at me confused. "What?.."

"I'm lost." ...Because no one is going to believe me.

With a forced laugh, she says, "Ah, of course. Are you heading to Vale?"

"Yes." I have no idea what Vale is, but it's better to go along with it.

"You still haven't answered my question." I say, hoping she's not a human trafficker or, worse, a provision thief.

"There were reports of irregular grimms movements in the area, possibly attracted by a strong accumulation of negative emotions."

"Negative emotions, huh?" I'm sure it wasn't my fault; there must be another reincarnated in this forest crying like a girl and regretting their decisions.

My mind alarms. "Wait, are there more?" Ready to jump behind my human shield named Aria.

She just smiles at my worries. "Don't worry, my companions have already dealt with them."

A few more steps and we finally arrive. Home sweet home, it's just as I remember: my favorite puddle, my shoe, and my two food rations.

"I found it," I say, lifting my shoe in triumph.

"Good, let's go. I'll escort you to Vale, my companions shouldn't be far."

I feel a great sense of relief. "Thanks." Sorry, forest, it was good while it lasted, but it's time for me to find greener pastures with fewer monsters.

I feel a bit embarrassed at this moment. "I'd love to thank you properly, but I don't have anything with me at the moment." I considered giving her one of my rations, but I refuse to be a typical anime protagonist who gives away his supplies as if they're worthless. In the end, they'll turn out to be the lost material used to forge the demon king's sword. I'll keep these provisions safe until I confirm they're worthless.

With a playful smile on her lips, she says in a teasing tone, "Oh, don't worry about that. But if you feel the need to thank me, you can always give me a kiss. Haha." Her eyes have a mischievous glint.

...

...

"Well."

"Hahaha, calm down, it was a joke… wait, are you serious?"