Son Goku's Disciple Naruto

"Nii-san... I still don't know your name." Naruto and Karin were flying north. Once they were well clear of the two shinobi they'd left behind, Karin finally broke the silence.

"I was wondering how long you were going to hold that in," Naruto said, a hint of a tease in his voice. "How come you didn't mistake me for some old geezer?"

"It's not that easy to fool me," Karin said confidently, puffing her chest.

"The name's Naruto Uzumaki," he told her. "But when we're around others, just call me Uzumaki."

'So he's my cousin,' she thought.

"Was that person... really one of our clansmen, too?" Karin asked quietly.

"Mm." Naruto nodded as he continued flying.

They made small talk as they traveled, and with Naruto flying at full speed, they arrived at Hozuki Castle in no time. Before they entered, Naruto handed Karin a small hood and a mask to wear.

'It smells like him,' she thought, hugging the cloak and taking a few deep, greedy breaths. "Hehe."

Naruto just shook his head. 'My cousin's a little weird.'

He found the warden waiting for him.

"Warden Mui," Naruto said simply. "It's time to fulfill your promise."

Naruto's trip to Kusagakure had been brief, so brief, in fact, that he had already returned with Karin before the escaped Suzuki Jiro had even made it back. As for news of the village's destruction, given the speed of information in the Shinobi World, it would take another day or two to circulate.

From Mui's perspective, Naruto had been gone for less than half a day. Not only were his own subordinates missing, but the boy had returned with a child in tow. None of that mattered, though. If his men were dead, they were expendable.

The problem was the promise.

"Let's begin." Mui said, his face a stern mask as he looked at Naruto. If he weren't so unsure of the boy's true strength, and so certain he couldn't win a fight, Mui would have already tried to drain him of his chakra by force.

'Kurama, lend me some chakra.'

'I can give it to you, but don't call me by my name anymore.'

'Okay, Kura-chan.'

'Is that how you ask for a favor, Naruto?'

'Are you giving it to me or not?'

'Fine, fine. Just take it and get lost.'

This brief exchange was between Kurama and Naruto. Their relationship had evolved over time, becoming something unconventional. They weren't exactly close friends, but more like mischievous companions.

A ball of fiery dark orange chakra materialized in Naruto's palm. "Will this do?"

"Tailed beast chakra?" Mui's eyes went wide, fixed on the orb of energy. It felt both ominous and pure at the same time. Though he couldn't tell how many tails' worth of power it held, it was unmistakably Tailed Beast chakra. He had only mentioned it offhand, and this kid had actually gone and gotten it. Did that mean Kusagakure had a Tailed Beast?

Mui's assessment of Naruto's power rose another level. Maybe, just maybe, the Box of Ultimate Bliss could finally be opened.

"Come with me," Mui said, suppressing the excitement rising in his throat. He led Naruto and Karin to the central plaza of Hozuki Castle.

"Summoning Jutsu!" Mui slammed his hands on the ground. With several puffs of white smoke, the Box of Ultimate Bliss appeared before them.

It was a perfect, two-story-tall cube of pure black. Carved onto its four faces were abstract, powerfully ugly expressions: joy, anger, sorrow, and pleasure.

"So ugly..." Karin muttered under her breath. Naruto despite not saying anything, agreed with her.

"Give me the chakra," Mui said, extending both hands towards Naruto. If it had been anyone else, Mui's personality dictated he would have simply tried to extract it directly. The problem was, Mui's ninjutsu was useless against Naruto.

Naruto gently pushed his right hand forward, and a layer of fiery chakra enveloped Mui's entire body.

"Tai-Tailed beast mode..." Mui stared in disbelief at the Nine-Tails Chakra cloak wrapped around him, a faint shimmer of three tails visible behind him. With his current control, Naruto could grant anyone a chakra cloak, similar to sharing ki.

"Is that enough?" Naruto asked. "Any more and you'll lose your mind." For an ordinary person, a three-tailed cloak was the absolute limit before their sanity started to fray.

"It should be enough." Mui pressed his hands against the Box of Ultimate Bliss. In less than two seconds, the Nine-Tails chakra was instantly siphoned from his body.

"It seems that wasn't enough." Naruto raised his hand again, blanketing Mui in another, more potent cloak of chakra. It vanished just as quickly.

"It needs more." He continued to pour Nine-Tails chakra into Mui. Only when the output reached the equivalent of seven tails did the box's absorption rate finally begin to slow.

"F-finally... it can be opened." Mui knelt before the box, panting heavily. His body was drenched in sweat, and the small lock of hair over his left eye was a mess. Being enveloped in that much of the Nine-Tails chakra was a trial for most shinobi.

"Oh, Box of Ultimate Bliss!" he cried out, raising his hands as if praying to a god. "Please, listen to my wish!"

Naruto watched, speechless. 'It's not Shenron, why are you praying to it?'

With that, Mui made his wish. To see his son, Muku.

*Crack!*

With a sound like escaping steam, one of the four faces of the box hissed open, revealing a pitch-black maw. Mui stared into the abyss, and a light slowly returned to his ashen eyes. He saw someone inside.

A rustling whisper reached Naruto's ears, too fast to understand. It faded, then echoed again, a mesmerizing sound like the murmur of an Lovecraftian entity from horror game.

"Uzumaki..." Karin clutched his sleeve, her body trembling. "There's something very bad in there. It's about to come out." An uncontrollable shiver ran through her, not of fear, but of a deeper, primal instinct. It felt like whatever was about to emerge from that darkness had deep hatred for all of humankind.

At this moment, all sound within Hozuki Castle fell silent. Even the sea breeze that usually whipped through the castle grounds also died.

*Clack... clack... clack...*

Clear, distinct footsteps echoed from within. As they grew louder, a young man with the right half of his torso exposed slowly appeared in the opening.

"Mu-Muku," Mui whispered, overjoyed. A smile finally broke across his stern face. 'Finally, I can see you again. My son.'

But Naruto and Karin could sense the truth. The thing that stepped out of the Box of Ultimate Bliss was not Muku. It was something, wearing Muku's skin.

It is a monster born in the box, named Satori.

--**--**

Narrator:

Why does this horrifying death box have emoji faces carved on it? Did Sage of Six Paths predict the online culture?

What kind of cursed loot box requires a tailed beast subscription plan to unlock?

What part of "ominous black cube with angry emojis" screamed "bliss" and not "call an exorcist"?

Since Mui has achieved his 'Ultimate Bliss', he can finally stop sucking people dry... of chakra.

Since the thing within box of 'Ultimate Bliss' wants to brutally kill you, does that mean whoever wants to open it is a masochist?

Karin: "Nii-san, I'm sensing... despair. Ancient, malevolent despair." 

Naruto (squinting): "Yeah... that ain't Muku. That's Muk-ew. Let's wait and see what horrible thing climbs out. I can't wait to fight it!"

Next time on..."Mui's Midlife Crisis Summons a Skinwalker"

"Tired of your dead relatives staying dead? Want to gamble your soul and your village's safety in one bold move?"

Try the Box of Ultimate Bliss™!

- Now featuring face-melting chakra drains

- Includes free emotional instability.

- Summons one monster guaranteed to ruin your week.

- Comes preloaded with unresolved trauma!

- Now featuring soul-siphoning silence, emotional devastation, and Lovecraftian whisper-Dolby surround sound.

Warning: Side effects may include existential dread, chakra bankruptcy, identity theft by interdimensional demons, and thinking your son came back when really it's just an angry hatred demon in a meat suit.

===============

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