Surviving as Guan Yu in the Three Kingdoms

The Yellow Turban bastards were still chasing us relentlessly.

“You on the horse, stop right there!”

Even in kindergarten, when friends told me to stop while running away, I didn’t stop. So why would there be an idiot who stops when told to do so by someone pointing a sword?

Do they think I don’t know that if I stop, they plan to turn my body into a porcupine with their spears?

Turning around while on horseback, I saw that the Yellow Turbans were all panting heavily from running such a long distance.

Some were even dry heaving from exhaustion after chasing us for quite a distance.

“Ugh, st-stop… stop right there…”
“Please just let us catch you…”

If they’re that tired, they should give up on the idea of plundering others to eat their fill and stop chasing us.

But they’re blinded by the thought of obtaining rice and various goods if they catch us, so they keep chasing without thinking of anything else.

Is it because I have some physical leeway now that I’m on horseback?

Watching them run so earnestly, not knowing they might soon die, they looked like moths flying into a flame.

It was so funny that I burst out laughing even though I was being chased by enemies outnumbering us more than tenfold.

“Stupid idiots.”

After running a bit more, I saw large clouds of dust rising to the left and right ahead of me.

Since strong winds weren’t blowing from that direction, the rising dust meant that the reinforcements led by Liu Bei and Zhang Fei were coming.

After fleeing for our lives over a considerable distance, seeing a chance of survival, I wanted to shout with joy for a moment…

But showing joy now would be like throwing ashes on our nearly complete strategy, so I forcefully suppressed my emotions and focused on fleeing.

Looking at the others:

They all seemed too preoccupied pulling carts containing bait to lure the Yellow Turbans to even look ahead.

“Aaaagh, we’re going to die like this… Someone save us!”

Some were even retching, apparently too exhausted.

“We’ll die if they catch us! Run, you sluggish bastard! Ugh…”

Unlike me, comfortably fleeing on horseback, they were all running for their lives on two legs, seemingly unable to even see what’s in front of them…

This is actually better.

If even one person here had shouted with joy at the sight of reinforcements coming to save us, it would have been all over.

If everyone can just hold on a little longer, we’ll be able to wipe out these Yellow Turban barbarians in one fell swoop.

As Liu Bei and Zhang Fei’s group drew close enough that we could see the shadows of people, I spurred my horse to catch up with Hude.

“Uncle Hude!”

Hude replied, panting heavily.

“Huff, huff… Yeah, I saw too… Zhang Fei and Liu Bei coming over there.”

Hude didn’t seem to find it strange at all that I was on horseback, even though he saw it.

I guess he’s too exhausted and distracted to pay attention to such things.

The fact that he’s still faithful to his duties even in this state makes me feel proud of him.

But that’s not important right now…

“The Yellow Turbans blinded by greed will soon see Lady Yide and Lady Xuande coming too. We need to tie them down here before they come to their senses.”

What I can see, the other side can generally see too.

So even those stupid Yellow Turbans will notice Liu Bei and Zhang Fei’s ambush if they regain their senses a little.

The road where Liu Bei and Zhang Fei are coming is quite thickly covered with bushes, but it’s still visible when hundreds of people are moving.

“How do we tie them down?”
“They’re very interested in the rice and cloth loaded on our carts, so let’s throw it all away. It won’t take long for them to get here from there anyway.”

Hude nodded at my words.

“Right, let’s tie them down by throwing away all the goods!”

After answering like that, Hude immediately ordered everyone.

“If you want to live, throw away all the carts! Let’s survive first!!”

As if they had been waiting for those words, everyone quickly abandoned the loaded carts and started fleeing at full speed.

“Run for your lives!”
“Forget the goods, just save us!”

We’re running away now all because of the strategy, but looking at this, it’s just like being helplessly chased by a gang of thieves.

Still, thanks to this, the Yellow Turbans, unaware of their impending doom, have their feet completely tied to the carts loaded with rice and cotton cloth.

“Those merchant bastards threw away their goods!”
“It’s full of rice! We’ll feast today!”
“Long live Master Zhang Jiao! Long live the Yellow Turban army!”

They moved so energetically that it was hard to believe they were the same people who were dry heaving while running just moments ago.

“Cloth is the best, this is what makes money, I tell you.”

Then, one of the Yellow Turbans holding a sack of rice sneered as if in disbelief.

“You need to eat to live, idiot!”

Meanwhile, some of the more prominent-looking Yellow Turbans even started shouting loudly.

“We’ll divide all the plunder equally, so don’t try to pocket anything.”

Yeah, enjoy to your heart’s content now.

You’ll soon be dead and unable to enjoy anything, so you’d better laugh while you still can.

As they were enjoying the bait we had brought, stones and arrows suddenly rained down on them from both sides.

“It’s an ambush!! Ambush!!!”

Some Yellow Turbans shouted warnings about an ambush, but the Yellow Turbans whose minds were already sold on plundering didn’t hear those words.

I’ve heard that when humans focus on something, they might not notice even if a bomb explodes nearby, and it seems that’s true.

After a brief shower of ranged attacks, this time the ambush troops led by Liu Bei and Zhang Fei rushed out with weapons.

“You rotten thieving bastards!”
“Why don’t you try dying today!”

The Yellow Turbans who suddenly noticed enemies appearing on their sides froze in place for a moment.

And now, our moths who finally realized the situation put down the goods they were holding and started to run wild.

“Enemy! It’s a surprise attack!”

If it were a properly trained army, they would try to form a defensive formation by gathering together with weapons as soon as they heard about an enemy attack.

Because in an era without guns, armies literally died if scattered and could somehow survive if they stuck together.

However, the Yellow Turbans, as if revealing to the world that they were mere mobs deserving historical judgment:

Instead of trying to gather together to somehow escape this crisis, they just looked at each other’s faces in panic.

The most cowardly ones threw away their weapons and everything else and ran away with their backs turned.

“Help! No!”

The rest held their weapons and looked around, but they were at a loss like broken machines, unable to take any countermeasures.

“Sh-should we gather and form a formation or something?”
“How should I know?!”
“Th-the enemy is coming!”

I’ve heard that the reason people die in disasters like fires is that they fail to figure out how to act due to the tremendous shock.

Although war isn’t a natural disaster, the way these Yellow Turbans are at a loss and in confusion right now is exactly like that.

Until now, they’ve only enjoyed war crimes like looting and rape by banding together, but they’ve never had proper training or fought a real war, so they can’t even fight when the enemy is right in front of them.

Zhang Fei and Liu Bei started sweeping away these guys at the forefront, as if in a drive hunt.

“Evil Yellow Turbans who trample on the weak! I, Liu Xuande, will not forgive you!”
“I, Zhang Yide, am your opponent! Don’t run away, let’s fight fair and square!”

Liu Bei elegantly wielded the twin swords in her hands, cutting down enemy soldiers, while Zhang Fei handled her long serpent halberd as if it were an extension of her arm, breaking through the enemy lines.

Well, Zhang Fei is the Zhang Fei who can take on ten thousand, so that’s to be expected.

As for Liu Bei, even among Three Kingdoms enthusiasts, there were only rampant speculations that she might be quite skilled based on her riding a horse and wielding twin swords, but as far as I know, there was no definitive evidence to claim she was certainly strong…

“Stop right there, you cowardly Yellow Turbans!”

Watching her fly like a butterfly and elegantly cut down enemies, it seems Liu Bei was indeed a master of the sword.

It’s just that she was overshadowed because her points of comparison were Guan Yu and Zhang Fei.

And now, we who had only been running away until now also charged at them with weapons.

“Die, you Yellow Turban bastards!”
“Let’s protect our hometown and families!”
“Kill them all without leaving a single one!”

Although everyone should have been tired from fleeing such a long distance, perhaps because the Yellow Turbans were being overwhelmingly pushed back?

Everyone smashed the Yellow Turbans’ skulls in a very excited state.

As the tide of battle began to turn, a man appeared from the enemy lines who, despite being a Yellow Turban, was mounted and properly armored.

“The Blue Sky is dead, the Yellow Sky will soon rise! The enemy is few! Push them back with numbers!!”

He says that, but seeing that he’s not charging in himself, it seems he’s just saying such things to stabilize morale.

And as if to prove that he’s probably the leader, order began to form around him little by little.

“The enemy is few!!”

The Yellow Turbans slowly started to gather like that.

That, if we let them gather like that, only our Xu County people will die. We can’t just leave it be, right?

I spurred my horse and rushed towards where he was.

“You bastard! I, Guan Yunchang, will take the head of you, the leader of the Yellow Turbans!”

The Yellow Turbans around him swung their weapons at me, trying to block me.

“Stop that bastard!”

However, their feeble sword and spear strikes didn’t reach me or my horse.

Instead, I sent all those who tried to kill me to the underworld.

As the distance to the leader gradually closed, he seemed to realize he couldn’t escape and thrust his spear at me.

I dodged it with a body movement and swung my crescent blade, accurately aiming for his neck.

In an instant, the man who had been the leader became a headless corpse sitting on his horse, and soon fell off.

The Yellow Turbans stared blankly at first when they saw this.

After 1 second, 2 seconds passed like that, they all started shouting that their leader had died.

“The Millenary Commander is dead!”
“Lord Deng Mao has fallen in battle!”
“Run if you want to live!”

And then the Yellow Turbans turned their backs and started fleeing wildly.

Seeing them, Liu Bei ordered.

“Chase them without leaving a single one! If we let them go now, they’ll try to plunder Xu County again later!”

And on this day, we directly killed over 400 out of the 1,000 Yellow Turbans.

Given who we were up against, it was an overwhelming victory.