Sweet Shot

#35

Tae-rim absolutely hated noise. So when his younger brother Tae-in said he was going to do music, he wasn’t very pleased. Perhaps due to his sensitive senses, he disliked anything loud and chaotic.

“There are so many people…”

Still, he came along because Ha-min had insisted on going. Tae-rim could have simply not gone, but seeing Ha-min’s persistence moved his heart a bit. He couldn’t understand why Ha-min wanted to see some amateur club band performance.

Ha-min muttered in amazement at the sight of people gathered in the auditorium. He was jostled around by the crowded people, his body swaying with each bump. He seemed to want to get closer to the stage, struggling through the crowd while trying to minimize inconvenience to others. Tae-rim watched these actions indifferently from behind.

“It’s crowded… are you okay?”

Ha-min asked Tae-rim worriedly, even though he himself didn’t look okay. Tae-rim nodded with a faint smile.

“Well.”

Unable to say he liked something he disliked, he gave a short answer. Not wanting to say he disliked it either, he offered a slight smile. Ha-min smiled slightly in relief.

As they approached the stage, Ha-min let out a short breath. He seemed nervous due to the crowd. Why was he so cautious about everything?

“Chae-rin is on guitar… Woo-kyung is the vocalist. Tae-in is on keyboard. Tae-in wrote the song himself.”

Ha-min explained to Tae-rim, who was standing blankly. Though uninterested, Tae-rim smiled and nodded.

If his parents knew Lee Tae-in was doing this kind of music, they would surely be shocked, but Tae-rim let his brother do as he pleased. Partly because he felt sorry for his brother who had always been controlled due to illness, and partly because he wanted to see his parents’ reaction when they eventually found out.

As it seemed about to start, a girl with bleached hair came out from behind the stage. She came out without any sign of nervousness and checked the chords. Ha-min’s face, which had been full of tension, suddenly brightened. Oh? Tae-rim’s eyebrow twitched.

“Chae, Chae-rin…!”

Ha-min, who usually avoided drawing attention, called out eagerly, awkwardly raising his hand. It was an urgent gesture, as if afraid she might not see him. He seemed to want to show his delight.

Chae-rin turned her head, apparently having heard, and raised her hand in a casual greeting. A brief smile crossed her previously expressionless face. Then, seeming to notice Tae-rim beside Ha-min, she hid her smile and greeted stiffly with a nod. Tae-rim responded with a brief smile out of courtesy.

“She’s so cool…”

Ha-min murmured, his eyes shining as he looked at his friend on stage. He seemed impressed by her bold appearance, seemingly unfazed by the large crowd.

Big deal. Tae-rim smirked. Then he quietly observed Ha-min’s profile. His neat, docile, handsome face came into view. His usually tense and withdrawn face was softly relaxed. He seemed genuinely happy to see his friend. Or else…

“…”

Tae-rim stood silently behind Ha-min. Until then, Ha-min hadn’t noticed Tae-rim standing behind him and just stared blankly at the stage. Not interested, huh? Tae-rim indifferently extended his arms and embraced Ha-min. Only then did Ha-min turn his head with startled eyes.

“Ha-min.”

Tae-rim whispered in Ha-min’s ear, worried he might not hear due to the surrounding noise. Ha-min’s face instantly stiffened as he turned.

“How’s it going with getting a girlfriend?”

“…Huh?”

Ha-min’s back stiffened at the sudden close contact and unexpected question.

His clear eyes darted about confusedly, trying to answer Tae-rim’s question. After hesitating for a while, he carefully opened his mouth.

“…Y-yeah.”

Her? Tae-rim swallowed the question that was about to burst out.

Hmm. Tae-rim let out a low sound. Well, with that face, there would be a line of people. While Tae-rim silently held Ha-min, the stiffened Ha-min squirmed. The subtle movement seemed like he was struggling to break free. Tae-rim unconsciously furrowed his brow.

“Why?”

At the gentle question, Ha-min’s lips quivered like a small, nervous animal.

“Well…”

“…”

“If others see… it’s a bit…”

It was a carefully chosen phrase, as if afraid of hurting Tae-rim’s feelings. Tae-rim nodded as if understanding. Oh, so the embrace was uncomfortable, that’s what he meant. Tae-rim chuckled. He doesn’t want to be misunderstood, is that it? Because of her? Tae-rim unconsciously gritted his teeth. Why was everything so irritating today?

“Alright. If you don’t like it, whatever.”

Tae-rim hid his expressionless face and smiled playfully. Ha-min hastily shook his head in surprise.

“It’s, it’s not that I don’t like it.”

Tae-rim finally smiled with satisfaction at Ha-min’s quick denial. Then, as if teasing further, he moved his lips.

“Then?”

“Just… it might look… strange…”

Ha-min recalled the classmates he had bumped into in front of the bathroom earlier. Although he hadn’t heard clearly, it surely wasn’t anything good. It was better to be cautious.

Contrary to Ha-min’s anxious feelings, Tae-rim gently asked again.

“To whom?”

“Not anyone in particular… just. Because we’re both men…”

“…”

“You have a girlfriend too… there might be misunderstandings…”

That again.

It seemed that fact kept bothering that small head of his. His girlfriend, misunderstandings, people’s eyes, those things.

Tae-rim nodded slowly as if understanding. He seemed more like a player, backing out like this after eagerly offering to suck him off like a scared rabbit before. Just then, Tae-rim’s phone in his pocket vibrated. The name Son Hee-jae appeared on the screen.

It was a call whose purpose he could roughly guess. Tae-rim turned around with a languid expression.

“Where, where are you going?”

Ha-min asked urgently as Tae-rim turned away. His eyes were like those of a trembling foal.

“It’s about to start…”

His face clearly showed he wanted to watch together. Tae-rim smiled leisurely.

“I’ll just make one call and come back.”

Ha-min nodded with a relieved expression at Tae-rim’s kind words. Tae-rim pushed through the crowded people. He clicked his tongue, disliking the sensation of shoulders and flesh pressing against him. This was why he hated crowded and noisy places.

**

The performance seemed to have started, as thumping noises could be heard even outside the building. Even the surrounding air seemed to be buzzing. Tae-rim redialed the missed call. The light dial tone was cut off after a short while. Tae-rim put a cigarette in his mouth while holding the phone to his ear. With a click, he opened his Zippo lighter.

“Hello.”

The voice answering was harsh. Tae-rim smirked at the stiff voice.

“Where are you?”

He asked, though he wasn’t really curious. There was a moment of silence from the other end. Tae-rim continued calmly.

“You’re with Sa-hyun, right?”

He had guessed as much since they left together. The three had been hanging out together since their study abroad days. There was a large group of families who knew each other, and among them, Son Hee-jae and Kim Sa-hyun were the closest to Tae-rim. He had always known that Kim Sa-hyun looked after Son Hee-jae. He had long sensed that their relationship, which they called friendship, was special. Son Hee-jae, who always needed to be superior in relationships, wouldn’t be satisfied with just Lee Tae-rim. Lee Tae-rim didn’t have enough affection to fulfill her desires. His attitude of not caring whether he was hit or not, his coldness in treating everything as trivial, his cold inner self despite smiling outwardly – these were facts Son Hee-jae knew as well.

“Didn’t you send him to be with me?”

Son Hee-jae, who had been silent for a moment, asked back. Tae-rim took a long drag on his cigarette. Exhaling thick gray smoke, he answered indifferently.

“That’s right.”

A deflated laugh was heard at his low voice. It was a laugh expressing weariness at his constant attitude.

“Hee-jae.”

He called out calmly as he heard her laughter.

“Shall we break up?”

He asked casually while finishing his cigarette. It was just a relationship in name anyway. Just casually meeting and breaking up. These things never stirred any emotion in Lee Tae-rim.

At the calm question without a trace of hesitation, the other party let out a short sigh.

“I was going to say that anyway.”

“I thought so.”

He didn’t think there would be a good ending after leaving on such bad terms.

“Hey, Lee Tae-rim.”

This time, she called his name softly. Tae-rim just listened without responding.

“You know you’re a bastard, right?”

As if she had been waiting, she spewed out vulgar language. There was venom in her voice, but her tone suggested she wasn’t particularly angry.

“I didn’t expect much when I dated you, but you lack even basic manners.”

Despite her words of criticism, he just chuckled. He didn’t deny it particularly. Hee-jae seemed to have one last thing she wanted to say.

“Even though I knew what I was getting into when I dated you, you…”

“…”

“If you keep living like this, you’ll regret it someday.”

It was advice meant to be taken to heart. Tae-rim humbly accepted the sincere advice given based on their years of friendship.

“Alright, I’ll keep that in mind.”

With a face that couldn’t be more indifferent.