Taming the Obsessive Attachment

“Kwon Jae-jin, that’s impossible.”

“Impossible? You can’t do it?”

“Restoring memories is different from erasing them… It’s incredibly dangerous.”

“So, are you saying you can’t do it? Answer me, Seo Eui-woo. Are you saying it’s impossible?”

“Listen to me. Messing with the brain is already risky enough, but restoration—it’s dozens of times more intricate and precise than deletion. If anything goes even slightly wrong, your brain will fry completely. And then…”

“Can you do it or not?! Cut the bullshit and just answer the question!”

“…Then, you’ll die.”

Seo Eui-woo muttered, his expression frozen as cold and rigid as an ice sculpture.

His strikingly refined features—so breathtakingly sculpted, almost enough to steal a person’s soul—darkened as if he were witnessing a horrific sight he couldn’t bear to imagine, even in his worst nightmares.

“The gaps in your mind are already massive. Countless memories have been ripped away. Restoring all of them is nearly impossible, and even attempting it is lethally dangerous. Your brain will burn up, and you’ll die in agony. Even if you survive, your mind will be shattered beyond repair. You won’t be yourself anymore.”

“What…?”

“I won’t do it. I don’t want to. I refuse to be the one who ends your life, Kwon Jae-jin.”

“…”

“And you? Do you actually want to die? Are you really fine with that? Are those lost memories worth risking your life?”

Die.

Seriously?

Just to recover a single memory… Is it really that dangerous?

Looking back, Seo Eui-woo had always been cautious whenever he used his psychic abilities. He had constantly warned of the risks, insisting he would only skim the surface, acting uncharacteristically reserved. That all-powerful Seo Eui-woo… The S-Class Esper…

So now, he was saying he really couldn’t do it?

“…Whether I die or not, we won’t know until we try.”

Kwon Jae-jin murmured, expressionless. His face was as lifeless as a corpse.

“It’s close to impossible, but not entirely impossible, right? It’s just extremely dangerous, not something that absolutely can’t be done!”

“Jae-jin, what the hell is wrong with you?! We’ve been fine all this time without those memories! What’s missing? What’s so lacking when you’re with me? Why?!”

“Being fine without my memories—fuck, how the hell is that being fine?! You’re fine when you’re sane. Isn’t that right? You forced me—you cracked my fucking head open, manipulated me, controlled me to suit your own fucking taste! Fuck! Fuck! You kidnapped me, locked me up, tied me down! And that’s what you call ‘fine’?! That’s supposed to be fine?!”

“But I couldn’t just let you die! I couldn’t let them throw you into the fire and tear you apart like some aberration! Locking you up was better than getting executed! Tying you down was better than watching you throw yourself off a building or bite off your own tongue! So what the hell are you saying now…? You really want me to kill you, Jae-jin? With my own hands? Me—me?! You want me to scramble your brain and rip your life away myself? Are you insane?!”

“So what? I have wanted to die before. When I was with the 1st-timeline Seo Eui-woo, I thought about it as easily as breathing. I even tried to kill myself.”

“Ha…”

“Whether I die by suicide or die trying to restore my memories—it doesn’t matter to me.”

“…….”

“It doesn’t matter. You don’t get it? Now that I think about it, I’ve already died once, torn apart by a gate. Wow, I thought my only career experience was being a hostage, but turns out, dying is on my résumé too… Perfect.”

At those words, Seo Eui-woo crumbled.

He thought Kwon Jae-jin was the only one falling into the fire. But he was falling too.

Struggling together, trapped in this nightmare neither of them had foreseen, Seo Eui-woo shook his head violently. A chilling intensity radiated from him.

“No. I won’t do it.”

“Why not?”

“Because I can’t live without you, Jae-jin. No matter what insane shit I’ve done, it was always for one reason. To keep you alive, breathing—with me.”

To an Esper, a Guide is absolute.

The stronger the Esper, the more so.

Seo Eui-woo needs Kwon Jae-jin.

“Asking me to kill you is the same as asking me to choose destruction.”

Kwon Jae-jin also needs Seo Eui-woo.

The Jae-jin of the first timeline may not have needed him, but the Jae-jin of this round does. He needs him to get his family back.

“Then if you’re that desperate to keep me alive, if you really don’t want to kill me—just do it properly, Seo Eui-woo.”

It was Seo Eui-woo who had laid down the cruel choices from the very beginning.

It looked like there were two paths, but in reality, there had only ever been one.

“Don’t fail. Don’t fry my brain. Just break through the obstacles and use your ability properly. Just succeed. If you succeed, that’s all that matters.”

Whether he’d be a normal person or a Guide.

Whether he’d be executed or guided.

Whether his memories would be erased or he’d be bound in chains.

Seo Eui-woo had always forced Kwon Jae-jin into cruel choices. There was no reason Jae-jin couldn’t do the same to him.

“You think I endured everything until now because I wanted to? Because I liked it?” His voice seethed with raw emotion. “I’ve faced impossible dilemmas over and over again. So now, it’s your turn, Seo Eui-woo.”

“……”

“You erased my memories. And you’re the only one who can restore them. So take responsibility and fix it!”

Jae-jin’s black eyes gleamed wildly, the depth of his unresolved emotions laid bare.

He could never forgive Seo Eui-woo. Not until he used his own hands to fill the gaping holes he had carved into Jae-jin’s mind.

But that also meant… if Seo Eui-woo did restore his memories…

If he just gave them back… then Jae-jin could forgive him.

Deep down, Jae-jin still wanted to accept him. If he were being honest, he wanted things to go back to the way they were. Those times had been good. Being close, skin against skin, teaching Seo Eui-woo how to cook, soaring over the open ocean together, moving from house to house with the seasons, resting his head on Seo Eui-woo’s lap, tying an apron around him, wearing matching clothes, kissing, having sex, guiding… just…

Jae-jin wanted that with Seo Eui-woo.

“Say it. Give me an answer, Seo Eui-woo.”

Jae-jin pushed him toward a choice, his tone sharp, almost threatening.

Seo Eui-woo only shook his head, over and over, swallowing the wreckage of his emotions.

“…I’m sorry. I can’t.”

“Say it. Say you’ll give my memories back.”

“I—”

“Say you’ll try, that you can do it.”

“…Jae-jin. Please.”

“I said, say it! Try! At least pretend to try!”

Seo Eui-woo pulled Jae-jin into his arms and collapsed onto the bed with him.

Jae-jin thrashed violently in his embrace, screaming with unrelenting fury. He couldn’t contain the rage tearing through him, spilling into curse after curse.

“Fucking hell! Fuck! Fucking bastard! Aaaagh!”

Jae-jin lost control.

He kicked at Seo Eui-woo with everything he had, swung his arms wildly, slapped his face. He hit him with his palm, then with his fist, and when that wasn’t enough to cool the rage burning inside him, he grabbed Seo Eui-woo by the collar and shook him furiously.

Seo Eui-woo didn’t resist. He didn’t even flinch.

It wasn’t the pain of being hit that seemed to bother him—it was the fact that Jae-jin was fighting him at all.

“Ugh, stop. You’re going to hurt your hands.”

“Let go! Fucking let go!”

“You’re swinging too wildly. If you’re going to punch, make a proper fist and strike cleanly. You’ll sprain your wrist.”

“Seo Eui-woo, you son of a— you fucking son of a bitch!”

“Hit me. If that will ease your heart, then do it as much as you want.”

Seo Eui-woo let his body go defenseless, lowering his gaze as he surrendered himself. He loosened every muscle, making it clear he wouldn’t resist no matter what Kwon Jae-jin did to him. His body—sculpted like a finely cut diamond—slackened, the movement resembling obedience.

Kwon Jae-jin clenched his teeth and threw a punch at Seo Eui-woo’s face.

With his fingers tightly curled, knuckles locked, he struck swiftly and precisely—just as Seo Eui-woo had told him to.

His fist, weighted with his entire body, landed squarely on Seo Eui-woo’s face, again and again.

That youthful, clear, strikingly handsome face—so pale, so pristine, so breathtakingly beautiful that Kwon Jae-jin had found himself admiring it time and time again—was now beaten without mercy.

Seo Eui-woo’s head snapped back as he spat out a mouthful of blood. His cheek swelled red, his eye began to puff up.

Breathing heavily, Kwon Jae-jin stared at him—wounded, bruised, battered—his chest heaving.

His breath came too fast, too shallow. No matter how hard he gasped, it wasn’t enough.

It was suffocating. His chest ached, his insides twisted painfully.

It felt like he was about to pass out while still awake.

“…Seo Eui-woo.”

“…Yes.”

“Seo Eui-woo… you…”

“Yes, Jae-jin.”

“Ugh…”

Kwon Jae-jin shoved him away. Seo Eui-woo, offering no resistance, allowed himself to be pushed back to the edge of the bed.

“No matter what… even if I say I hate it? Even if I say I can’t do this?”

“……”

“Then I can’t do this anymore either.”

Kwon Jae-jin muttered the words as if making a declaration. His dark eyes, usually calm and steady, trembled violently.

“I can’t guide you anymore. As of today, I’m done being your Guide.”

“…What?”