Taming the Obsessive Attachment

Bloodshot eyes glaring, Jae-jin bared his teeth and sneered. “I told you—I won’t do any guiding until my memories are restored. But judging by how easily you’re trying to touch me, I guess you’ve already made up your mind?”

“No, I…”

“If not, then move that finger away. Right now.”

Having said his piece, Jae-jin yanked the blanket over himself. His instincts screamed that getting entangled with Seo Eui-woo right now would do him no good. In the same room—on the same bed, no less—if he so much as looked at the man’s face and exchanged words, he might lose his chance to ever reclaim his memories.

Seo Eui-woo let out a disgruntled sigh as he watched Jae-jin burrow into the blanket like a silkworm cocooning itself. He had only just managed to suppress his abilities, yet now Jae-jin was acting like this, making his insides twist again. Deep in the abyss of his mind, that thing stirred, unstable once more.

“…Do you really think I’m doing this just to guide you?”

Eui-woo loosely placed his hand on the crumpled blanket.

“Do you think that’s the only thing I want?”

With fabric separating their skin, there was no chance of guiding taking place. Both of them knew that. Eui-woo slowly traced the outline of Jae-jin’s curled-up form through the blanket, his palm gliding along the soft ridges.

“If you’re going to act like this, don’t ever say you know me again.”

His hand smoothed over the hunched shoulders, then moved down to gently caress the curve of Jae-jin’s back. Just as Jae-jin was about to growl at him to get his hands off, a heavy weight settled atop his cocooned form.

Seo Eui-woo had pulled Jae-jin—blanket and all—into his arms and stretched out over the bed.

“…What the hell do you think you’re doing? I told you to get off.”

“I’m not going to guide you.”

Eui-woo’s hands wandered over the white fabric, seeking out Jae-jin’s waist. Even without seeing, he found the spot as if by muscle memory. His strong arms wrapped firmly around Jae-jin’s middle, locking him in place.

“I won’t do anything. I won’t talk, I won’t bother you. From now on, we’re just going to sleep.”

“What…?”

Jae-jin asked, dumbfounded.

Eui-woo, his voice calm yet chillingly subdued, responded without hesitation.

“Sleep. It’s time to sleep.”

Being this close, it was impossible not to notice.

Seo Eui-woo’s insides were churning just as violently as Jae-jin’s. His mind was teeming with dark, unruly thoughts, just as chaotic.

It was obvious he wasn’t in his right mind either, yet here he was, talking about sleep. Jae-jin couldn’t begin to guess what was going through his head.

“Stop talking now and close your eyes.”

“Seo Eui-woo, are you messing with me right now?”

“Ah, I said stop talking… Let’s just sleep. I won’t touch you. As you can see, you’re wrapped up in a blanket. Not a single inch of skin is exposed. No guiding effect. I won’t even lay a finger on you, so let’s just sleep, okay?”

“What kind of fucking—”

“I’ll put you to sleep.”

He started patting Jae-jin’s back.

Like soothing a swaddled baby, he did it with careful patience. Jae-jin struggled to wriggle free, but having wrapped himself up in the blanket earlier had been a grave mistake—there was no escape.

Not that it would’ve been easy to get away even under normal circumstances. When Seo Eui-woo decided to hold onto him, breaking free was never simple.

“Let go. I’m not in the mood for jokes. Let me go.”

“Hey, don’t struggle too much. The blanket will slip off. You said you didn’t want guiding, remember?”

“Seo Eui-woo.”

“I really don’t mean anything else. I just want to sleep with you. That’s all. I’ll just hold you like this.”

“……”

“This much… you can let slide, can’t you? It’s not like I’m asking for much. I just want us to sleep… together.”

“……”

“What, you can’t even do that? You hate this too now?”

“Hah, as if I’d fall for such an obvious—”

Jae-jin opened his mouth, ready to fire back with a biting remark. He jerked his head up in frustration—only for the blanket that had been covering his face to slip down.

And in that instant, his cheek brushed against Seo Eui-woo’s.

“Ugh!”

Jae-jin flinched as if he had been burned, instantly ducking his head and curling up.

“See? I told you not to squirm.”

“……Move. Seo Eui-woo. Let go and move away.”

“Good night, Jae-jin.”

Eui-woo patted him again, just like before. His already slow movements grew sluggish, until eventually, they stopped altogether.

It seemed… Seo Eui-woo had fallen asleep.

Jae-jin couldn’t be certain, but it felt like Eui-woo had passed out first, still wrapped around him as if binding him in place. Or maybe… he was just pretending to be asleep.

‘Hah. This bastard.’

Jae-jin opened his mouth, fully intending to ruthlessly kick Seo Eui-woo out this time. He couldn’t push him away—touching skin again was too risky—so instead, he planned to yell at him at the top of his lungs.

But at that moment, something strange happened.

For some reason, his tongue refused to move as he commanded.

It was as if the words he wanted to spit out were lodged firmly in his throat, unable to escape past his lips. He should be yelling at Seo Eui-woo to let go, to stop messing around and get the hell out. And yet, inexplicably, he couldn’t.

Was it because his mind, utterly exhausted, had reached its limit? Or was it because, on some subconscious level, this position—being held—felt… familiar?

He hated Seo Eui-woo. Despised him. He didn’t even want to look at his damn face.

And yet, lying in bed together like this felt oddly comfortable.

Because this was normal for Kwon Jae-jin.

They had spent countless nights tangled up like this. He had never once doubted that they would continue doing so.

Just how contradictory, how flimsy was the human heart?

“…….”

Jae-jin, lips parted in anger, clenched them shut in humiliation.

Just moments ago, he had been certain that he wouldn’t be getting any sleep tonight. Yet now, simply because Seo Eui-woo was beside him, drowsiness came as if it had been waiting all along.

This wasn’t right.

This shouldn’t be happening.

‘It’s not because of Seo Eui-woo. I’m just so fucking exhausted I can’t keep my eyes open… Yeah, I’m only this way because I’m at the point of collapse.’

And really, even if he threw Seo Eui-woo out of the bedroom right now, it wouldn’t solve anything. They were still living under the same roof. He couldn’t avoid him forever.

Sure, he could lock himself in his room for a day or two, but eventually, he would have to come out. He would need to eat. He would need to shower. And, as Seo Eui-woo had pointed out, he would have to… sleep.

Not that he had to share the damn bed while doing so, but still…

‘Whatever…’

Fucking whatever.

Once again, his thoughts ended with a fucking curse.

Jae-jin, having lost all will to fight, shut his eyes in defeat. Before long, his tangled mess of thoughts faded, and he sank into sleep—like slipping into a thick, viscous swamp.

***

Of course, he was in the middle of the universe.

His unconscious had once again fled to this vast, black expanse, detached from reality.

Saturn and its 82 moons lined up to greet Kwon Jae-jin—Titan, Enceladus, Mimas, Dione, Iapetus, Tethys, Hyperion, Epimetheus…

With a heavy heart, Jae-jin gazed at the celestial bodies.

This space, which had nothing to do with his twisted and fucked-up life, was always strangely useful.

Compared to this transcendent, higher plane, his existence was nothing but a speck of dust.

His worries, his restless heart—none of it mattered here.

As he let himself melt into the cosmos, utterly absorbed, an unwelcome voice slipped into his mind.

‘Jae-jin, you really like this kind of stuff, huh…’

Seo Eui-woo’s voice stabbed into his ears, piercing deep.

Jae-jin flinched, startled, and quickly turned to look around.

Far in the distance, peeking out from behind the barely visible sun, was Seo Eui-woo, his head tilted curiously as he emerged.

‘I wonder if I could use coordinate shifting to come to space too. Never tried, so I wouldn’t know.’

This is a dream.

Just a hallucination born from his subconscious. That wasn’t the real Seo Eui-woo.

He knew that. But even so, Jae-jin couldn’t suppress his reaction.

‘Seo Eui-woo! Do you even know where the hell you are right now?’

‘Huh?’

‘Why the fuck are you following me here, you bastard…?! Can’t you at least leave me alone in my dreams?!’

‘Well, I mean… This is your dream, Jae-jin.’

‘You wouldn’t understand, being an Awakened, but in normal society, family is… family is the one thing no one should ever touch. It’s a universal taboo, something you don’t break. And yet, you—!’

Jae-jin spat his words in a furious rush, but before he could finish, Seo Eui-woo had already closed the distance between them.

Even though he had been way back behind the distant sun, he appeared before Jae-jin in an instant, as if the space between them had never existed.

“Haha, what are you even talking about? I don’t get it.”

Seo Eui-woo took Jae-jin’s hand and spun him around.

Just like that moment, when they had stood together above the vast blue sea.

Like figurines on a music box, they twirled in slow, weightless circles against the backdrop of the cosmos.

“I’m here because this is a dream.”

Seo Eui-woo’s smile was radiant. His long, upturned eyes curved beautifully, and his pale cheeks were dusted with a soft peachy hue.

He looked young. Barely twenty.

Fresh-faced and unguarded, Seo Eui-woo leaned in and placed a light, fleeting kiss on Jae-jin’s lips, as if stamping a seal.

“Jae-jin, you want to escape reality right now, don’t you?”

“You don’t want to fight, don’t want to be angry, don’t want to hurt each other anymore. You just want to get away from it all.”

The pressure of his lips felt disturbingly real.

And not just that.

Even the delicate brush of his long, fine eyelashes against Jae-jin’s cheek was vivid enough to send a ticklish shiver through him.

“Here, you want to do this with me, don’t you…?”