Chapter 33: "Chapter 33: Revenge is a Dish Best Served Hot"
Hearing Alex's maniacal laughter, everyone in the room grew tense, not understanding why he started acting this way. Hestia had just asked him to teach a lesson to the guys who attacked the girls. While Alex rummaged through his pockets, everyone watched him with strange looks, as his maniacal grin didn't leave his face. Hestia, more than anyone, didn't understand what had just happened. One moment they were discussing how to deal with the gods who wanted to cause trouble, then the members of her family returned, and suddenly Alex began laughing and talking about revenge.
"Alex-kun, what are you planning to do?" Hestia asked cautiously.
"As a wise man once said, 'Revenge is a dish best served cold.' But I don't agree with those words. Revenge should be swift, like a stone flying towards the head," Alex replied, searching in his pockets for items that would help him in this task.
"Don't tell me you plan to go to the Soma family's house," Hestia asked, watching as Alex finished his preparations.
Alex nodded and started returning to his adult form, changing into his signature outfit for causing trouble. Seeing Alex return to his adult form, Hestia realized that this time, the problems would be bigger than before.
"No, I won't let you do what you're planning!" Hestia yelled, running up to Alex and clinging to him.
"Hestia, my dear goddess, you asked me to teach them a lesson. Why are you trying to stop me now?" Alex asked, looking at Hestia hanging on him.
"I asked you to teach them a lesson, not to create even more problems," Hestia yelled, preventing Alex from moving.
Seeing that Hestia wasn't willing to let him go, Alex came to a decision that would allow him to leave. He looked at Hestia seriously, making her start to feel nervous.
"Hestia, if you let me go, I'll make you an offer you can't refuse," Alex said, looking Hestia straight in the eyes.
"W-What offer?" Hestia asked nervously.
"A date just for the two of us. Just you, me, and a candlelit dinner," Alex whispered in her ear.
Hearing his proposal, Hestia blushed deeply, and her pigtails began to twirl from embarrassment. Noticing that Hestia's grip was loosening, Alex decided to use his final weapon in this situation. He slowly leaned down to Hestia and kissed her on the forehead. Feeling the kiss on her forehead, Hestia completely lost consciousness from embarrassment. Alex caught Hestia, who had fainted, and gently laid her on the couch, deciding to continue his preparations.
Everyone watching Alex's actions at that moment was stunned. No one expected him to handle Hestia in such a manner. Some watched the interaction with envy, while others just shook their heads with wry smiles. Everyone was curious about what exactly Alex had said to Hestia to make her blush so much, and why he decided to kiss her, even if it was just on the forehead. Just as Alex was about to embark on his path of revenge, another goddess intervened, understanding that Alex's actions would lead to no good.
"Alex, whatever you're planning, you better stop it," Hephaestus said in a stern tone. Alex turned around at her words and looked at her intently, making Hephaestus nervous.
"Hephaestus, how can you do this to me?" Alex said, putting on a sad face.
"What are you talking about?" Hephaestus started to get nervous.
"Don't you remember that evening when we stood under the moonlight in each other's embrace?" Alex said dramatically, causing question marks to appear over everyone's heads.
"What evening? What moon? What embrace?" Hephaestus, blushing, began to ask questions.
"How can you forget that wonderful evening," Alex said, with tears welling up in his eyes. Everyone who heard Alex's words turned their gaze to Hephaestus, who was blushing and confused about what was happening.
"We admired the beautiful full moon, you were in my arms, and I whispered words of love into your ear," Alex continued, approaching Hephaestus.
Seeing him coming closer, Hephaestus began to step back until her back was against the wall. Alex slowly approached her, took her hand, and brought his face so close that their noses almost touched.
"Don't you remember all my words of love to you, Hephaestus? Don't you remember how you turned and hugged me tightly, saying that you loved me too, that we would be together in sorrow and joy, and that whatever problems we might face in the future, we would overcome them? And our passionate kiss of love that we shared afterward?" Alex said, bringing his face closer to Hephaestus. She blushed even more until her face was as red as her hair. Alex slowly leaned in, and seeing his face get closer, Hephaestus could no longer bear it and fainted from embarrassment, sinking to the floor with a red face.
Seeing that another goddess had been taken out, Alex proudly smiled. Everyone who saw and heard his every word and action stood with their mouths open in astonishment. Those who knew Hephaestus couldn't believe that such a serious goddess could have done such a thing and then fainted from embarrassment. The most amused at this moment was Tsubaki, who had always seen only the serious side of Hephaestus and finally saw her blush like a lovesick maiden today.
Alex was just finishing his preparations when he was interrupted again. Loki, seeing that two goddesses were out of commission, realized this was her best chance to join in on the chaos with Alex. While Alex was distracted, watching the blushing Hephaestus, Loki quietly snuck up, jumped on his back, and wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his torso.
"You know you're not going anywhere without me," Loki said, clinging to Alex.
Alex sighed heavily, having forgotten about Loki. He still remembered his vow to never take her along again, knowing that this woman could ruin everything. Not knowing what to do with Loki or how to distract her from the situation, Alex thought for a moment, pulled Loki off of him, and began to look at her.
"What, do you want to kiss me or hug me, or maybe you want to start whispering words of love in my ear?" Loki said, looking at Alex before her. "Just know, I'm not as simple as these two. I don't mind if you kiss or hug me, but I'm still going with you."
Alex continued to look at Loki, still unsure how to get rid of her.
"If you keep looking at me like that, I'll kiss you myself," Loki said and grabbed Alex's head to kiss him.
"Loki," Alex simply said. Loki stopped and raised an eyebrow, not understanding what he wanted.
"I have something for you," Alex said, setting Loki down and reaching into his pocket.
"What is it? Are you going to take the initiative and kiss me? Or do you want to invite me to your room? I'm up for anything," Loki said, causing everyone in the room to grimace.
"No, I have something better for you," Alex replied with a crooked smile.
"What could be better than kissing a goddess or spending the night with one?" Loki asked, watching Alex reach into his pocket.
"I'm giving you this. It's a bottle of rum you won't find anywhere else, it's one of a kind in this world," Alex said, pulling a bottle of rum from his pocket and showing it to Loki.
"And what do you want in return?" Loki asked, her eyes fixed on the bottle.
"You don't come with us, and this bottle is all yours," Alex said, waving the bottle in front of Loki's eyes, which followed its every move.
"Have fun or get a one-of-a-kind drink," Loki thought aloud, still staring at the bottle. She thought hard, not wanting to give up. She wanted both to drink and to cause trouble. Loki thought so intensely that everyone felt like smoke was about to come out of her head. Finally, Loki gave up and made her choice.
"I choose the alcohol. But this is only for this time, and remember, I'm not an easy goddess to fool. Next time, you're taking me with you. But for now, I have a date with this beauty," Loki said, snatching the bottle from Alex's hands. Everyone who knew Loki's true nature just rolled their eyes, understanding that this drunkard just wanted to maintain her goddess prestige.
Seeing that all obstacles were removed, Alex turned his attention to Lily, who had started to regret her decision and wanted to retract her words. Alex noticed her hesitation, approached her, and crouched so their eyes were level. Lily looked into Alex's radiant eyes and began to feel embarrassed, imagining he might treat her the same way he had with Hestia and Hephaestus. But her dreams were not to come true—she forgot that once Alex was set on creating chaos, he was hard to stop, and all his actions with the goddesses were only to clear the way.
"My little Bilbo, what troubles you?" Alex asked, starting to stroke Lily's head.
"Stop calling me Bilbo! Maybe we shouldn't do what you planned and just forget about what happened?" Lily said with a grimace, trying to dissuade Alex.
"My little Bilbo, this is our adventure. Even if we have to face enemies and create problems, it's still an adventure. While you're young, you can make minor mistakes. When else can you have fun if not in youth? While the fire of your youth burns, you need to do crazy things. So that when that fire starts to dim, you can remember these moments with a smile on your face among your friends," Alex said with such passion that everyone who heard him was inspired by his words.
"So, Bilbo, you don't need to worry. Keep smiling, even when facing problems or enemies. Everything should be faced with a smile. Whatever we do today, we must do it with a wide smile on our faces," Alex said, smiling like an omnipotent being.
"And now, Bilbo, let's start our new adventure, get revenge on the wrongdoers, and show them who's in charge," Alex added, pointing a finger at the sky.
Cassandra and Daphne, watching Alex trying to convince Lily to create chaos and get revenge, could only smile wryly. But when Alex spoke about the fire of youth burning in their hearts, they too wanted to participate. Daphne was already ready to be part of this adventure, while Cassandra was still doubtful. Seeing Cassandra's indecision, Daphne decided to make the choice for her.
"Um, Alex, can we also join you?" Daphne asked, intruding on Alex and Lily's conversation. Alex turned his head to Daphne and began to consider the decision.
"Of course, you can. You're part of this story too, so you can join," Alex said, changing Daphne and Cassandra into matching outfits.
"From now on, your code names are 'Merry' and 'Pippin'. Remember them and never use your real names. Here are masks for the new participants," Alex said, approaching the girls and placing his hands on their shoulders. After Alex welcomed them into the group and handed over the masks, they immediately put them on.
Seeing that everyone was ready to go, Alex and his new team of chaos creators were set for their path of revenge. All the while, a silver-haired goddess watched them with a smile, also eager to benefit from Alex's path of vengeance.
"Ahem," Freyja gently cleared her throat, drawing the attention of everyone in the room. "Haven't you forgotten something, Alex?" she asked, gazing at him with soft eyes.
Alex turned to Freyja and frowned, thinking that another goddess was trying to interrupt his fun. Finally, he had new allies, part of his family, and after this event, his family would be even closer and more united. Now someone else was trying to interfere with their adventure. Everyone noticed Alex's serious expression and became wary, not understanding what he intended to do at that moment. Alex strode determinedly towards Freyja, but was blocked.
"You won't get close to Lady Freyja!" Allen shouted, stepping in front of Alex. In response, he received a karate chop to the head and crouched down.
"Freyja, why are you trying to stop me?" Alex asked, approaching Freyja so close that he could feel her breath.
"Is it fair that all the goddesses in this room received something, but I did not?" Freyja said in a seductive tone.
"Of course, I'll give you something," Alex replied, leaning closer to Freyja. She squinted, trying to figure out what he was planning.
"Boop!" Alex said, poking Freyja on the nose, leaving her bewildered as she touched her nose, unsure of what had just happened.
"What was that?" Freyja asked, looking at Alex in surprise.
"That's all you can get for now," Alex said with a toothy grin.
"Ha-ha-ha! No one has ever treated me like that before, but it's so refreshing. This time I'll overlook your antics. But next time, you'll need to give me a reward to earn my forgiveness," Freyja said in a tender tone, placing her hand on Alex's cheek and gently stroking it.
"You can continue, and we'll head home. Feel free to visit anytime," Freyja said, removing her hand from Alex's cheek and giving him a gentle kiss on the cheek before heading for the exit.
Alex couldn't understand why Freyja was doing all this. It was a very strange experience for him, as from his memories of this world, Freyja had been completely different. Putting those thoughts aside for now, Alex turned to his companions and was ready to set off. Knowing where the Soma family's home was located, Alex decided to teleport them to the nearest alley, so they wouldn't have to walk far and wouldn't be noticed as they made their way directly to the place.
While Alex was preparing his revenge plan and trying to deal with the goddesses obstructing him, the Soma family members returned home, all covered in bruises and dirt. They were met by other family members who were idly lounging around and drinking. Upon seeing their condition, everyone started laughing and pointing fingers. Not wanting to be laughed at for being defeated by a group of little girls, the leader of the beaten group decided to lie, claiming they had faced a large group of adventurers who attacked them.
"I see you had a good time," one of the Soma family members said with laughter.
"Yeah, looks like you had a rough time," another one laughed.
"We were attacked by a group of adventurers, but we managed to fend them off," the leader of the beaten group lied through gritted teeth.
"As you say. But you still got treated like a kid," a third laughed.
"There were more of them, and there were only five of us. I'd like to see how you would have handled the situation. At least we managed to put up a fight. You'd probably have been beaten up right there," the leader of the losers continued to lie.
"And now give us some medicine so we can tend to our wounds," he continued.
Everyone kept laughing at their condition until someone brought the medicine for bandaging. While the group of fools was tending to their wounds and planning revenge on the girls who had beaten them, there was a knock at the door. One of the Soma family members opened the door and started talking to the person knocking. It wasn't long before the person who had opened the door stumbled back into the house and fell heavily to the floor, crashing into the wall. Everyone immediately turned their attention to the group that had entered, led by a strange person in a mask who, according to rumors, had been attacking adventurers.
After Alex and the girls teleported to the alley, Alex began distributing items that would help them with their task. Lily received a pair of iron knuckles in exchange for her gloves, Daphne, being the heavy hitter, got a large club, and Cassandra, the weaker girl, received a stun gun to fend off and incapacitate her opponents. Alex handed each girl a pamphlet labeled "Orario Dental Center." The girls read the title on the pamphlet and looked up at Alex, confused about its meaning. Alex simply shook his head and told them not to think too much about it.
Deciding it was time to go, Alex headed towards the Soma family's home. As he got closer, he observed the house, which looked more like a den than a god's residence.
"Lily, we do as usual. Do you understand?" Alex said, looking at Lily. Lily nodded seriously, remembering that she just needed to follow Alex's instructions and do everything on time.
Daphne and Cassandra didn't understand what Alex meant, but Lily simply said to listen and do what Alex said, and everything would be fine.
Seeing that everyone was ready, Alex knocked on the door and waited for it to be answered. Hearing the approaching footsteps, everyone prepared and waited for the door to open.
"Who are you and what do you want?" asked the adventurer who opened the door, looking at the strange group before him.
"Hello, good sir. We are representatives of the Orario Dental Center and have come to ask you a few questions," Alex said, looking at his interlocutor.
"What questions do you want to ask?" the adventurer asked in confusion, still looking at the strange group before him.
"While you review our pamphlet, we'll ask you a few questions," Alex said, and Cassandra handed over the pamphlet for review.
"Would you be willing to donate your teeth for scientific purposes?" Alex asked, looking at the adventurer who decided to read the pamphlet.
"What teeth? The pamphlet only says 'Grin and Bear It,'" the adventurer replied angrily, raising his eyes to Alex.
"If you don't want to give them up voluntarily, we'll take them by force. Now, grin and bear it," Alex said, delivering a punch to the adventurer's jaw. The blow sent the adventurer crashing into the wall on the other side of the hall, knocking him unconscious. As soon as the adventurer lost consciousness and his head dropped, his teeth began to fall out of his mouth. Entering the room where all the members of the Soma family were, Alex greeted them with a smile.
"Good evening, gentlemen! What a lovely evening it is, perfect for collecting donations for the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster," Alex said, moving to the center of the room.
The Soma family members were reluctant to respond and began drawing their weapons, pointing them at Alex and his group. Seeing that the conversation was not going well because these adventurers were not the most reasonable, Alex sighed and was about to continue speaking when one of the adventurers lost patience and decided to attack.
Lily, who was still unsure whether to continue, saw that one of the adventurers decided to attack. She resolutely stepped in front of the attacker and struck him with all her strength, sending him crashing into the ceiling and then falling to the floor with a thud, losing all desire to continue fighting. Seeing their comrade hurt, the adventurers cast aside any doubts and began their attack. Alex noticed the battle had started and, shouting "Smash the fools!" drew his favorite stick, delivering a blow to the first adventurer who came into his line of sight. Daphne, as the true "Ogre," swung her massive club, sending attackers flying in all directions with maniacal laughter. It seemed she enjoyed the situation very much or simply wanted to relieve some pent-up stress. Cassandra, being the most timid, decided to hide in the chaos and quietly use the stun gun on enemies who ignored her. The adventurers, unwilling to surrender to those who had invaded their home and attacked them, fought hard, but no matter how they tried, the battle was lost in disgrace.
Alex surveyed all the members of the Soma family, who lay moaning and clutching their bruised spots in agony. He gave the girls a thumbs up, signaling that they had done well. He was searching among the injured bodies and finally found his target—the leader of the group of idiots who had dared to attack his family. Approaching the fool who lay on the floor clutching his broken leg, Alex squatted beside him, looked him in the eyes, and asked:
"Have you ever been told what madness is?" Alex asked, leaning in so close that the adventurer forgot about his leg pain and started sweating profusely.
"N-No," the fool stammered.
"If you haven't been told, then why did you answer?" Alex said, hitting the fool on the head. "I see you're suffering from leg pain. I can help you forget about that pain. Would you like that?" Alex asked, looking at the adventurer who was suffering from a broken leg.
"What are you going to do?" the fool nervously asked, afraid of what Alex might do.
"It's quite simple, don't worry. Just give me your hand, and the pain in your leg will go away," Alex said, gently taking the fool's hand and gripping the pinky finger, then decisively breaking it.
"Aaaaaaah!" the fool screamed as his pinky was just broken.
"See, now you've forgotten about the pain in your leg," Alex said, giving a thumbs-up to the fool, but the fool was already rolling on the floor in agony.
Alex shook his head at the ungrateful man and decided it was time to leave since the revenge had been completed. Calling the girls, who were currently kicking other adventurers trying to escape, they laughed and followed Alex. As they were about to leave the Soma family's house, a punitive squad appeared.
"It's them again! Catch them! This time they won't escape!" shouted the leader, pointing at Alex's group.
"Damn, they found us again! Bilbo, Merry, and Pippin, let's use the tactical retreat plan!" Alex shouted, tossing a smoke bomb at his feet and running into the alley. Once in the alley, Alex transformed back into a child, summoned "Chastifol," and sent the girls home. As soon as Alex finished teleporting the girls, the punitive squad charged into the alley and began looking around.
"Kid, have you seen anyone running through here?" the leader asked, looking at Alex in his child form. Alex simply turned and stared at the punitive squad, remaining silent.
"Kid, are you deaf? Didn't you hear what the leader asked?" one of the squad members said.
"Shut up! Look at this kid, then speak, or do you want to get us into more trouble?" another squad member said, trying to silence the first speaker. When the speaker took another look at the child, he realized his mistake and broke into a sweat, understanding that if anything happened, they would have to face two strong adventurers.
"Kid, I'll ask again: did you happen to see anyone running by?" the leader asked in a still calm tone.
"Are you talking about the strange people in masks?" Alex asked innocently, and everyone nodded. "They ran in that direction. They rushed past me, laughing and nearly knocking me over," Alex continued, pretending to be upset.
"Thanks for the help, kid. And you shouldn't be wandering around alone; you should head back home to your parents. They might be worried," the leader said. He didn't want these two causing a commotion in the city if something happened to the child in front of him.
Alex nodded, indicating he understood. Seeing that Alex was leaving, the leader led his squad in pursuit of the members of the "Flying Spaghetti Monster" cult, as they were now being called. The leader was determined to catch them, as they always managed to slip away like slippery fish. Seeing the squad leave, Alex thought it best to avoid returning home for now and decided to head to the "Goddess of Fertility" to hang out there until things settled down.
To be continued…