The waves of love in my life

Lena hadn't planned to go straight to Mira's apartment after Aariz left that morning.

But some things couldn't wait.

Her thoughts were too loud, her chest too full. And Mira had always been the first person she told everything to—except this.

And that fact alone made her feel like she was already drifting.

She stood at Mira's door for a long time before knocking. When the door finally opened, Mira blinked, still in her hoodie, hair tied messily on top of her head, a sleepy scowl on her face that quickly turned to quiet confusion.

"Hey…" Mira said slowly.

Lena managed a tired smile. "Can I come in?"

Mira stepped aside without a word.

Inside, the air smelled of cinnamon and chamomile—comforting, but Lena couldn't stop her fingers from fidgeting. She sat on the edge of the couch, unsure whether she should speak first.

Mira sat across from her, hugging a pillow to her chest.

"I need to talk to you," Lena began.

Mira gave a small, quiet nod. "I figured."

Lena stared at the floor, then back up. "He stayed the night."

Silence.

A full beat passed.

Mira's jaw clenched, just a little. "Aariz?"

Lena nodded.

"I see," Mira whispered.

She didn't ask for details, but her fingers tightened around the pillow, her eyes darting toward the window as though searching for something far away.

Lena continued softly. "It wasn't planned. I didn't invite him thinking it would happen. But… it felt right. Honest. Not perfect. But real."

Mira let out a humorless laugh. "That's the thing about the past, isn't it? It has this strange way of crawling back into the present like it never left."

Lena sighed. "It's not just the past. He's different now. So am I."

Mira looked at her sharply. "And what about me, Lena? Where does that leave us?"

Lena's heart stung. "This isn't about leaving you. It never was."

"But it feels like it," Mira said, voice cracking. "It feels like someone else is stepping into the space where I used to be enough."

Lena moved to the edge of the couch, her voice trembling now. "You are enough. You always have been. But I'm learning how to be something more than your safe place. I'm trying to let myself be… held, too."

Mira swallowed hard. "I just thought I knew every version of you. And now you're showing me a part I never saw. And it scares me."

"Why?" Lena asked gently.

"Because if you can change… then everything can," Mira said. "And if everything changes, I don't know where I fit anymore."

Lena exhaled. "Maybe… maybe we've outgrown the parts of ourselves that needed each other as shields. Maybe now we can just need each other… as we are."

Mira looked at her, eyes glossy.

"I thought we were unbreakable."

"We are," Lena said. "But being unbreakable doesn't mean being unchanged."

A Long Pause

Mira stood and walked to the kitchen. She poured herself a glass of water, took one sip, then dumped the rest into the sink without thinking.

"I'm not angry," she said. "Not really. I think I'm grieving something I didn't know was ending."

Lena stayed quiet, letting Mira fill the air.

"I guess I always thought we'd go through everything side by side," Mira whispered. "Like we'd grow old together and laugh about our disasters and never… need anyone else."

"We still can," Lena said softly. "But maybe now we get to bring more people into the warmth. Not because we're broken without them—but because we finally know how to love without losing ourselves."

Mira turned slowly, eyes red. "Did he make you feel like you were enough?"

"Yes," Lena replied without hesitation. "But more than that… I didn't feel like I had to earn his affection. Or manage his emotions. I just… existed. And that was enough for him."

Mira sat back down beside her. "That sounds… terrifying."

"It was," Lena admitted. "But it also felt like peace. The kind you don't trust at first because you're so used to chaos."

They both smiled a little at that.

A Moment of Honesty

"Were you in love with him… back then?" Mira asked.

"I think I was," Lena said. "But I didn't know how to love without sacrificing myself. And he didn't know how to receive love without shutting down. We weren't ready. Not then."

"And now?"

Lena leaned her head against the back of the couch, eyes distant. "Now I'm not trying to save him. And he's not trying to be someone he's not. We're just… seeing each other. Clearly, this time."

Mira wiped a tear from her cheek. "You deserve that."

Lena turned to her. "So do you."

That Evening – Mira's Journal

*"It's hard, watching your constant evolve.

Harder still when you realize she never stopped needing love—she just put it on hold for you.

And now she's choosing it.

Choosing herself.

Choosing a man who didn't deserve her once, but maybe does now.

I want to be mad.

But the truth is…

I'm proud of her.

I'm scared of change.

And I'm wondering if somewhere out there, there's a version of love that fits me, too."