The Wind of My Life

Going to the principal's office with Professor Williams and Naomi felt like walking a defendant to a judgment. As dramatic as it is for me to say this, I wouldn't doubt it would be that vibe, even more so when it comes to one of the principal's protégés going through a problem with another regular student. The walk was silent, and luckily we didn't find any students outside the classrooms, so going to the principal's office was easy, but the moment I walked in, I was just silent and surprised.

Sitting in one of the chairs facing the director's desk, there was my mother, looking at me with a very sincere face. It was kind of a consensus between me, Ian and Naomi that one of my parents was going to be called, but I didn't think it was just my mother, and this is the first time in a long time I've seen her with that look on her face. Without taking too long, I sat down in a chair next to where my mother was sitting, while Professor Williams and another teacher who was already in the room went to lean against a wall near the principal's desk and Naomi leaned against the opposite wall, close to me. Glancing quickly at Naomi, I noticed that she was nodding towards my mother. I hadn't understood, but I didn't really like that the "judgment" began.

- (Director) First of all, thank you for coming, Mrs. Rodrigues. I hope we resolve this situation soon, given your condition.

- Director, don't worry about the time or my condition. I am here for my son and would like to understand what guarantees my presence here necessarily makes.

- Right. You are right, Mrs. Rodrigues.

Let's say my mother has two sides. A motherly and sentimental side, where she was like a cute and kind mother to her family members, while the other side is more "intense" to deal with. As a writer for a major news site on those rules near Madison, my mom has a very formal way with words, not just with what she says but her behavior, as she handles it in an extremely professional manner, far from a person downcast by account of his leg as many imagine. Just the director's silence and awkward way of having to listen to her talking is a minimal proof of what she's capable of when she puts these two sides together.

- In recent weeks, your son ended up going through some problematic situations involving the school and some students. One of them refers to graffiti in a room used by an extracurricular activities club, and the other, which was the reason we had the call, was a physical aggression committed by him with a student at the school.

Committed... Didn't even consider it an accusation. I am no longer surprised that the director tries to pass on what really happened or what may or may not be true, but what worries me is how my mother will react…

- I understand. With all due respect to you, I don't believe my son has the ability to do these kinds of things that could compromise him at school.

- We understand that you are defending your son, but unfortunately he presented a picture of inadmissible behavior for the school standards. And this is something we cannot ignore, taking into account the equality policy, values and social codes that we develop with students every day.

- Are you insinuating that my son just started to break this social policy because of behaviors contrary to what you defend so much at random?

- As hard as it is to hear, yes.

My mother sighed and…

- I raised my son based on many values that I learned in my life. Kindness, serenity, calm, patience and rationality, always having to adapt to what they ask. I think only his dad and I know him better than anyone, and one of the things I taught him above all else is to be true and loyal to what he believes in, as many fathers should do. Caring, educating and teaching them to be good people and kind to each other. If my son says he didn't do that, I will believe him because I didn't raise a liar or a person with malice to the point of deceiving me. Therefore, I believe you understand and accept that I will believe in my son. That he is innocent of all these problematic situations that you didn't even think about pointing him out as the cause of these problems.

When she finished speaking, I felt awkward. It seemed to me that she knows I didn't do it without even saying anything to convince her. I don't know if it's because of this talk of a mother wanting to protect her child, but I felt a certain firmness in her words.

- I understand that you're defending your son, but I must warn her that she has other people involved in these situations and they were harmed, seeking solutions to reduce these losses.

- I understand. But if that's the case, why am I the only person in charge here? Where are those responsible for the students participating in this club? Where are the parents of this student who was "assaulted" and didn't show up so far?

- None of them wanted to be publicly involved in these situations.

- And didn't you consider that I wouldn't want to be a public target in these situations either? I came to understand the situation by putting my dignity as the mother and guardian of my son to the test for you to say the parents of these students didn't want to get involved for fear of public retaliation? These are just situations that would happen to any teenager if they weren't taken so seriously because of an educational policy that values some students over others.

When my mom said that, the principal started to feel uncomfortable, looking at the teachers more seriously.

- Are you saying that I value some students over others even though I am strict with the student equality policy?

- Yes. It's not the first time I've seen this.

- Mrs. Rodrigues, I suggest that you become aware of what you mean in relation to my role as director. Since being selected for this position, I have been gratified by the educational policy I am maintaining in order to keep all students secure in their individuality as future citizens.

- In the same way as they did with Hector Onária, Isla Flaenor and Terry Hastings?

- Where did you get those names?

- Understand, director. I couldn't be present in my son's school life in the last moments because of my work, but when I was strongly present, I realized that this is not the first case of students of this school being accused with precipitation in relation to behaviors contrary to this social or educational policy that this school proposes and that you insist on applying. What is interesting is the fact that these students that I mentioned did not even have the chance to defend themselves because you gave more reason to the students who had truly caused problems but you highlighted why they were from families that finance the school...

- Don't speak ill of these gentlemen and ladies who…

Before saying anything, we all heard someone knocking on the classroom door. With a gesture, Professor Williams gestured for Naomi to go see who it was and headed for the door.

- Mrs Rodrigues, I hope you are aware that your son is in a very bad situation here. This is the situation…

- (Naomi) Director. Excuse me.

Without looking back, I just heard the door open and then close.

- (Principal) Naomi, why did you let this student in even with a meeting?

- (Naomi) You need to listen.

- (Director calming down) … Okay. What do you want?

- (?) I came here to talk about what happened yesterday regarding Kiara Remington and Sebastian.

The light and thin voice with a fearful tone made me turn my back and realize that it was Siena, Kiara's friend who was there when I defended Claire.

- (Professor Williams) How so? Were you there when it happened?

- (Sienna) Yes, teacher. The truth is, Sebastian didn't hang Kiara.

- (My mom looking at Sienna and the director) Wait… Hang? What are you talking about?!

- (Sienna) S-Sorry. I am not…

- (Director) Miss, please wait there…

- (Professor Williams) No, principal. Let her speak.

- (Sienna) So… Kiara was harassing another student at school. Sebastian saw and defended the student, before Kiara did something to her.

- (Director) And defended how?

Before saying anything, Sienna looked at me.

- (Sienna taking a cell phone out of her pocket) He pushed her towards me and another student who was with us that day. Later, Kiara ended up saying that she was going to hurt herself on purpose to blame it on Sebastian, taking advantage of the fact that the school's rumors about him graffitiing the supernatural studies club were not clarified.

Sienna ended up taking out her cell phone and showing it to the teachers who were watching what she had shown. At that moment, everyone was silent. My mother was incredulous with what she had just heard, returning to that more serious position, while the principal was waiting for the teachers' response. Naomi and I sighed deeply, while Sienna just looked at the teachers with an anxious expression, until after a few minutes, the teachers ended up gesturing with their faces to the principal.

- (Professor Williams handing back Sienna's cell phone) Okay… What's the name of the student that was being harassed by Kiara?

- (Sienna) Claire Hunnigan, teacher.

- (Naomi) Claire is a member of the supernatural studies club and was present with Sebastian on the day of cleaning the room, the day before the graffiti occurred. There have already been situations of harassment against her coming from several students for hasty religious issues.

When he finished saying that, the director only took a deep breath, furtively shaking his head, but everyone noticed.

- (Director) Madam Rodrigues…

- (My mother giving a wry smile) Yes?

- (Principal with reluctant expression of shame) … The situation will be reviewed with the teachers and the rest of the faculty. Please understand that this situation was only made to clarify the situation your child was placed in. Sorry for the misunderstanding...

- (Mom getting up) No problem~~ I hope you are convinced that my son is not a bad student.

Without saying a word, the director just turned his chair towards the window behind him, while me, my mother, Naomi and Sienna made our way out of the room. And even then, the feeling of tension didn't lessen strange...

…

- (Naomi) Thanks for coming, Sienna…

- (Sienna) Don't thank me. I just wanted to clear my status.

- (Naomi) Got it, but still… Thank you.

Even with Naomi thanking Sienna in front of me, I can't focus on anything but the wall so I don't have to look directly at my mother that I don't even have to turn my face to notice that she's staring at me. After a few seconds, Professor Williams and the other professor left the room.

- (Teacher X) Sienna, go to your classroom. Then we will call your parents to understand the situation.

- (Sienna turning around) Okay.

- (Teacher X) And you, Naomi. I suggest you do the same.

- (Naomi) Understood. I'm going.

Without saying anything else, the teacher and Sienna walked down the school corridor, while Naomi walked towards me.

- (Naomi) Calm down, okay? It all worked out in the end.

- Yeah, I hope so...

- (Professor Williams) Naomi, could you go to your office, kindly?

- (Naomi turning around) Yes, sir.

Like a diligent student, Naomi just walked away without even giving me a smile.

- (Professor Williams) Mrs. Rodrigues, your son is an example of a student. High grades, positive behavior with colleagues and extracurricular activities being fulfilled every day without fail. I believe that such rash actions were not caused by randomness, but due to interference from other people, as you noticed. I hope you understand that the director has his reasons for acting in such a way that not even the teachers can handle it without having to give in to certain "perks".

- (My mother) I understand the situation very well. And thanks for saying that about my son. I expected no less from his role as an educator in realizing the injustice that was happening.

- (Professor Williams) The bones of the trade, you know?

- (My mother) I understand.

- (Professor Williams) Right. If you want, I can talk to the teachers about accepting Sebastian's release from today's classes. It's going to take some time for these nasty rumors about him to die down among the students, and I think you need to talk privately.

- (My mother) Thank you very much for the offer, and I accept your suggestion. Let's go?

- (Sebastian) I need to get my backpack there in the student council room.

- (Professor Williams) Right. Go pick it up and head towards the exit. Madam Rodrigues, if you want, I'll accompany you until he gets back, all right?

- (My mother) Thank you very much for the offer.

Walking sedately down the hall, I quickened my pace when I was out of sight of my mother and the teacher. I ended up stopping on the stairs and breathing as hard as I could from this momentary relief. I thought I would do very badly, but things turned out better than expected, even though it was so fast. But now, there's only one thing left for me to deal with that's going to be way worse than what happened on the board… Dealing with my mother.

I took the stairs as quickly as possible, but when I rounded the corner of the stairs into the hall, all I saw was Naomi approaching, carrying my bag as she locked the student council room. Seeing me, she grabbed my backpack and brought it to me.

- The teacher released you, didn't he?

- Yes, how do you know?

- Standard procedure. I'm surprised you don't remember that.

- (laughing wryly) Sorry, but I'm not delinquent enough to understand that I'll be released after a meeting with my parents.

- At least, you already know what happens~~

- IT'S…

- So it is…

After the whole thing involving Robert and Kiara, I feel a little sad that I spoke in an aggressive way with Naomi, even if it wasn't the intention. But regarding Robert, I'm thinking it's better to know what's going on to avoid this type of situation again and still conclude my suspicions about him being a possible candidate for Ellyn's mission. Nothing to lose.

- (scratching head) I know I won't be able to go out today, considering what happened, but...

- (Naomi handing over my backpack) I think you better go soon.

- There is? I thought that…

- Sebastian, as much as I want to talk to you, your mother will need to calm down first before things get back to normal, so hurry up. I promise I'll text you later, but for now, just go.

Even with an expression contrary to telling me to go with my mother, I just took my backpack and put it on my back.

- See you later, Naomi.

Without answering, I just took the stairs and went to my mother. Seeing her from afar, I only notice her leaning against the entrance of the main school building, looking at the ground, until she notices me and starts walking towards the school exit. In silence, I just walked up to her.

…

The walk home has been slow since we've gotten a little farther from the school, along with a silence that makes me slightly anxious and nervous as to what my mother is thinking right now. I'm glad this problem didn't go on longer than it should have, but at the same time, I'm afraid to believe that problems only change when you see the consequences.

After a few minutes, we arrived home. She just opened the door and walked in without saying anything. I go in, close the door, take off my shoes and go to my room, when I hear a door closing noise coming from her and my father's room, so I think she's going to prepare my sermon. If that's the case, I have only one option left… I head towards my room, leave my bag on top of my bed and go back to sit on the couch in the living room, waiting for her to come. A few minutes pass and I hear the sound of a door closing along with footsteps coming from the hallway, and without taking long, I see my mother in more casual clothes coming towards me. I just watch her stop in front of me, standing and looking at me with her arms crossed.

- I can explain, mom.

- … Explain yourself.

- About what happened… the girl. I just went to defend a student who was being harassed by this girl the principal was talking about. I didn't attack her. About the graffiti at the club… It happened after I left school and there were a lot of other people who could have done that, so I promise you it wasn't me.

- I understood that part very well. But something is missing, isn't it?

- Have? I swear that was the only thing that happened at the school that involved me.

- So let me remind you... I swear if something happens, I'll tell you. You don't need to worry about me.

- Ah… That.

- We agreed since we got back here that I wouldn't meddle in your school life this year like the last few years, and besides, it's your last year before you start looking for a path you want to follow. You promised me that you wouldn't make a fuss, you wouldn't do something stupid, and above all, that if something happened, I would let you know so I wouldn't create a problem with your father regarding your future. And look what happened? He didn't even come back and he already got himself into two troubles, and for me, the biggest problem was that you didn't tell him. If you'd told me sooner, I could have made it easier for you at school, but what did you do? Tell me.

- I didn't count.

- Exactly! Sebastian, you're old enough to know that you can't do anything stupid anymore and that in the future, everything will depend on what you do today. I gave you my word and you didn't keep it. So tell me... Why didn't you tell me?

- I…

- I what?

- I didn't mean to worry you. I know this year, things haven't been going well for you and the old man, so I figured I'd better turn around and take matters into my own hands.

- Getting into trouble?

- No! I was just wanting to help one person. Only that. It's hell having to see what they do to people who can't do anything because other people think they're better just because of that rich family bullshit and pride and stuff like that. I hate having to see this every day and so I decided to help this person. But it's no use... In the end, I only made things worse and... You ended up having to make a scene there to defend me. I'm so sorry for what I did...

- And do you think you did the right thing?

- I just wanted to help.

- I don't care if you wanted to help. I asked do you think you did the right thing?

- Of course yes! I don't regret doing it to defend someone. And would have done it again!

I hate it when someone pushes me like that. I try to be as honest as possible, even if now I have to omit my interest in Claire because of Ellyn and Jack. But every time someone does this to me... I feel weak. I feel like a simple rabbit facing wolves. It's like even if I tell the truth, nothing matters but what people want said. And it hurts me. I avoid thinking about it every day, and even though I am who I am, I don't want people to see me as a weak person. I want to be the one standing there smiling and saying everything is fine. I don't want to be weak.

- Son…

After uncrossing her arms, my mother sat on my left side.

- As much as I believe in you, I must admit that you weren't smart enough to think of anything else. And this is not now.

- Huh?

- Lately, you seem more… impulsive. I don't see that what you did was a bad thing, even if you almost hit someone, but you're not like that. Something happened?

- What? No. I just… tired. I got tired of just looking. I want to make things work, even if I don't have to meddle, but...

- But what?

- But I… I can't say what I'm feeling. I just can't be quiet.

- …

Without me realizing it until I felt it, my mother put her hand on my left side, as if she was going to give me a hug, but she stayed the same way she sat down. Just by my side, looking straight ahead.

- I know it's hard to sit still. But it's too early for you to start acting like this. It could be stress, tiredness, puberty…

- Mom, I understand.

- My point… Is that you don't have to give in like that right now. You are too young to use your "restlessness" for these things. There will be moments when you will have to chase, fight for what you want, but now, you need to build it. If you feel like you can't sit still because of something bad happening to good people, you need to understand that these things will never stop and people need to learn to cope. I don't see anything wrong with you having defended this student, but sometimes, it's better to understand that not all fights can be won. One thing or another may be worth it if you insist, but know that not everything you want will bear positive fruit. I say that because your dad and I have been through it, and as much as it's a sign of maturity, it doesn't mean it's something people would understand unless they felt it.

- Mom…

- Sebastian… Whatever you're doing, know that you can count on me, your father and your friends. You don't have to do everything alone because you think you're capable or because you think you need to move. All it takes is a little nudge to get us going, so if that person saw what you did, they'll be able to fight for it.

- So for now… feel good about thinking you did something right, okay?

- OK...

- But seriously… Did I need to pull the collar of the girl's shirt?

- Either that or she wouldn't stop.

- I understand why even Naomi was stunned when she called me.

- So she was the one who told you everything, wasn't she?

- You should be more grateful for the guardian angels you have, even though I would like her to stay in that role permanently~~

- M-Mom!

- Just kidding… I just wanted to relax this moment. Pretending to be serious all the time is not my strong suit, you know that?

- I know it.

- Sebastian… I don't want you to hide anymore what happens to you if it's something troublesome. If something happens at school, you can tell me. But if you hide again and pretend to me, I'll get you out of there and there won't be any smooth talk. Understood?

- Yes mom.

- (mother getting up) Great… I won't tell your dad, but in exchange for that, I think the house needs hands to tidy up.

- (sighing) Okay, Mom.

- And don't leave the house today. As much as I've already relieved myself, I can't iron so calmly. So today, tidy up the house and get something to do.

Without saying anything else, my mom just went to her room. Unlike what Ian and Stella told me when their parents fight with them, my mother tries to be as rational as possible instead of trying to insult me for free or attack me. And as much as a spanking or insults are so aggressive, my mother's words are much more striking and much more aggressive. At least things have settled down for the time being and I've gotten away with at least a few things guilt free. I just hope nothing worse happens...

…