DC/Marvel: This Guy is Insane

The button Stryker pressed was not for self-destruction. It was for the release of his ultimate Weapon X subject—his most prized creation to date.

"Evacuate immediately! Abandon the base!" Stryker commanded.

"Yes, sir!"

The base could be rebuilt; life, however, was finite. As a man who had dedicated his life to fighting mutants, Stryker valued his own existence above all else. With his ultimate Weapon X creation delaying the intruders, a safe evacuation was all but guaranteed.

The base had been built within a mountain, as if the entire peak had been hollowed out. It contained dozens of distinct zones—recreation areas for soldiers, living quarters, armories, and more—resembling a small, self-sufficient town.

"Americans are truly extravagant," Alan mused, passing by a fitness center filled with hundreds of pieces of equipment. "Even their secret evil lairs are luxurious." Beyond the obvious lack of a red-light district, it had everything imaginable.

"Construction work is a much faster way to make money than robbery," Wade observed meaningfully.

"So, if we were to rob the capitalists who fund this place, wouldn't that be even faster?" Alan's eyes lit up, proposing a bold idea.

Wade immediately shot it down. "I'm not afraid of death, but I am afraid of being relentlessly hunted by the entire world." A single bounty from a capitalist would unleash every mercenary and bounty hunter on the planet. Wade, being a mercenary himself, understood the terrifying power of money.

"Little psycho, do you have a twin brother?" Alan's attention was drawn to an enemy blocking their path. He looked exactly like Wade, except his mouth was gruesomely stitched shut.

"Shit! The only family I have is my cousin, Deathstroke!" Wade drew his twin katanas, furious. "That's a clone!"

"No wonder he looks exactly like you," Alan muttered, finally understanding. Wade's frequent skirmishes, which often left him missing limbs or scattered across the battlefield, made it incredibly easy to obtain his genetic samples. Alan also recalled the modified Deadpool from the movies. That version of the ultimate Weapon X was a terrifying combination of numerous superpowers: teleportation, healing, adamantium blades, and even optic blasts.

But in Alan's current timeline, a clone wouldn't have Cyclops's optic blast ability, especially since Cyclops was now an official X-Man and currently on a mission.

"I'm gonna kill you, you fake! I'm the real star of this comic book!" Wade roared, launching himself at the clone. Anyone would be furious to be inexplicably cloned.

The clone Deadpool instantly teleported behind Wade, thrusting his self-regenerating blades deep into his back.

"My kidneys! You're so vicious! You want to ruin my happiness forever!" Wade retorted, twisting his katanas to pass through his own body, attempting to impale the clone from the inside. However, the clone shimmered, teleporting away just in time.

Wade, impaled by the clone and by his own blades, looked utterly bewildered. "Fighting myself, and I'm the only one getting hurt."

"I'm going to find reinforcements. You hold him off!" Alan declared, promptly vanishing with his invisibility. He hadn't checked his horoscope today. Now he was surrounded by enemies who either shot him or were unkillable pests. As a close-quarters combatant, Alan had no intention of dying needlessly. He couldn't help but sigh. At least DC scenarios make sense. Whether it's heroes or villains, their powers are generally logical. Mutants, though, are a mixed bag. Some are genuinely strong, others just think they are. Like that Porcupine-Man from the Brotherhood of Mutants—pathetically weak but always craving attention.

"Little psycho! Come back!" Wade yelled, pulling the swords from his abdomen. He gritted his teeth and continued to fight. If it weren't for his regeneration, he'd have been long gone by now. His swords, having been pre-soaked in the adamantium solution, were still intact. Otherwise, they would have shattered.

Blades clashed, sparks flew. Alan, lurking in the shadows, constantly sought an opening for a sneak attack. He wasn't sure if the Blade of Redemption could one-shot the clone. Truth be told, he hesitated to gamble. If he succeeded, everything would be fine. If not, he was in deep trouble. A teleporting enemy could easily bypass his defenses and pierce him through the heart, bringing his story to an abrupt end.

I wonder if the author's sales are doing well, Alan thought, a torrent of anxious thoughts racing through his mind. What if he's thinking of dropping the series because of poor performance and just kills me off? Or maybe he wants Wade to be the main character…

Suddenly, a flash of purple light. Illyana emerged from a spatial rift, her Soulsword slashing cleanly through the clone Deadpool's neck. Time seemed to freeze. The clone stood rigid for a moment, a thin red line appearing on its neck, deepening by the second.

THUD!

Its head hit the floor, and the headless body crumpled to the ground.

"Good thing you made it in time," Wade said, pausing his fight. Then, stubbornly, he added, "I was about to finish him myself."

"I don't believe you. You were getting your butt kicked the whole time," Alan retorted, reappearing from invisibility. The clone hadn't taken a single scratch during the entire fight. Wade had been the one getting cut up. All his regeneration meant was that he was incredibly hard to kill.

"Everyone's rescued. We need to withdraw," Illyana urged. Thankfully, Magik's timely intervention with her Soulsword, which could damage souls, had allowed her to instantly kill the clone, whose regenerative abilities were ineffective against it. Of course, her sword wouldn't work on Wade, who had Death's favor and an indestructible soul.

"We have to catch Stryker," Alan said gravely. "If he's not dealt with, this trouble will never end." Colonel Stryker could mobilize the military and all of America's resources against the Xavier School. They couldn't be on the defensive forever. A determined enemy only has to get lucky once.

Illyana nodded. "You have a point." This time, they had been lucky. Next time, they might not be.

Colonel Stryker was in a helicopter, speeding towards his next military base. His hand hovered over a self-destruct button. His clone and human experimentation were forbidden and unethical. If exposed, they would trigger a public outcry. The mutants would seize the opportunity to gain sympathy, so he had to erase all traces of his work. Otherwise, the American public would turn on him, and the military would ensure he was silenced, leaving no evidence behind.

Just as he was about to press the button, he felt a cold steel blade press against his neck.

Three new figures had suddenly materialized inside the helicopter. Before the soldiers could react, Wade and Illyana had taken control of the situation. Any soldier who dared to move would be swiftly sent to the afterlife. Alan grabbed Stryker by the collar, and with another shimmer, Illyana teleported them away again.

The remaining soldiers watched their superior being abducted, exchanging helpless glances. They couldn't fight them, they didn't want to die, and it was all just so difficult.

A golden sunset painted the sky above the Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters. It had been a truly harrowing day. The returning students looked at the devastated campus, marveling at how eventful their lives had become. They had narrowly escaped being cut up as test subjects.

"Everyone, gather!" Illyana's voice echoed across the athletic field. The students quickly assembled. Magik, though a reserve X-Man, had earned the right to lead by rescuing everyone. Each mutant, utilizing their unique abilities, worked together to restore the campus. Soon, the school was bustling with activity as they meticulously rebuilt.

Except for Alan and Wade. They were busy.

Each holding an end, they carried Stryker into the Headmaster's Office. Stryker, with Wade's smelly sock stuffed in his mouth, was making muffled protests. He struggled, but two swift blows from Wade quickly subdued him.

"Little psycho, what do we do with him?" Wade asked, looking at Stryker. He really wanted to end the man right then and there. This fanatic had tormented mutants for years, harming countless innocent lives. Not just the X-Men, but the Hellfire Club and the Brotherhood of Mutants hated him as well. If he hadn't had his official position and his Weapon X creations, he would have been dealt with long ago. Charles, however, was too soft-hearted, believing that violence only bred more hatred.

"Tie him up. Let Professor X handle it." In a way, Stryker was a valuable bargaining chip. Giving him to Charles might secure some rights for mutants.

Alan pulled out a coil of rope, a sinister grin on his face. "Hold him down. I'm going to perform the Grand Binding Art."

"The Grand Binding Art?" Wade looked confused.

"It's a special binding technique I learned from Silent Hill," Alan explained. He remembered the twisted creatures wrapped in barbed wire and was eager to put the method into practice.

Cough… hack… Stryker managed to dislodge the sock with his tongue. "I am a Colonel!" he threatened. "Do you wish to fight against the state?"

"Shut your mouth!" Wade picked up the sock and jammed it back in. Alan began to tie Stryker with elaborate knots. After a flurry of activity, he stepped back, admiring his handiwork. "I call this binding technique 'The Convergence of All Streams,'" he declared.

"What's so special about it?" Wade asked, playing along.

"No matter how he moves, the tension will always converge on a single point," Alan said proudly. "It truly tests the skill of a rope artist."

"You really are a man of many talents."

"Want to learn? I can teach you."

Stryker was in agony, contorted in an excruciating position. The slightest movement sent ripping pain through his lower body. He gritted his teeth, enduring the torture in silence.

Night fell.

The X-Jet returned to the school at maximum power. The students, having narrowly escaped, had immediately reported the incident to Charles and the others, who had rushed back. As the X-Jet landed on the athletic field, the X-Men saw the students working to repair the campus. Their emotions were complex.

Charles's face was grim. He knew he had been played. Thankfully, the students reported no casualties, and they had even captured the enemy leader. Learning that Stryker was being held in the Headmaster's Office, the X-Men immediately rushed there to get the full story.

Click.

Charles flipped the light switch, illuminating his office. To his surprise, he saw his usual armchair, its back to the door, with two figures nestled together on it.

"Who are you?"

(End of Chapter)

***

[Check Out My Patreon For More Chapters On All

Of My Fanfics!!] [www. [email protected]/meowthtl]

[+300 Power Stones = +1 Bonus Chapter]

[+500 Power Stones = +1 Extra Chapter]

[Thank You For Your Support!]