I Am Puss In Boots

Clip... Clop... Clip... Clop...

Tornado took slow steps as both he and Puss calmly admired the surroundings.

In Puss's hand was a paper cup from Starbu… err… Farbucks, which he had fought hard to get.

"I asked for leche, not latte. Is it really that hard to understand?" Puss grumbled, sipping his latte.

Yes, he wanted milk and coffee, but when he asked for leche, the barista immediately assumed he meant latte.

That started a whole argument, with him trying to explain that he wanted leche, not latte. And when the barista finally understood after his long explanation, Puss shamelessly ordered a latte anyway— which was what he had wanted from the beginning.

Thus, he left under the stunned, confused gaze of the barista, latte in hand.

"Maybe I'm just too stubborn?" Puss scratched his head, remembering it, then shrugged. "Nah…"

Shaking his head in amusement, Puss looked ahead.

He had already left the city's central area and entered a more marginal part of town.

It wasn't a bad area, just less crowded, and the houses were clearly less wealthy— but it was obvious that the people there were not suffering.

'King Harold seems to be a good ruler. Maybe a terrible father, but at least a good king who doesn't harm his people with greed like most kings usually do…' Puss thought, then gave Tornado a pat on the neck, making him stop on command.

Puss bit onto the lid of his cup and held it there.

With his hands free, he pulled out the map and opened it, occasionally raising his head to look at the buildings, though his brows furrowed the more he studied it.

'Strange… this house should be the one on the map, right?'

Puss looked curiously at the drawing of a house next to the red 'X' on his map, then raised his head and found the house that seemed to match.

Then he looked at the house next to it and lowered his gaze again to the map, noticing that house was shown on the opposite side of the 'X.'

'Huh? What's going on? Where exactly is the X, then? Could the map be wrong?'

Puss scratched his head with one hand and lowered the map completely, confused.

But it was that very action that allowed him to notice something he hadn't seen before.

Between the two houses, there was a tiny alley, and there— a tiny little house, with a small patch of green grass in front— sat nestled between the two much larger neighboring houses.

The tiny house barely reached Puss's chest in height. It was so small it could be mistaken for a dollhouse. It stood out awkwardly between the two large neighboring homes.

'Oh, looks like this is it.'

Puss's face lit up, and a small smile grew as he tucked the map into the saddle.

Grabbing the cup he had been holding in his mouth, he finished it off, then gave it a shake, letting the last drop fall onto his tongue, before crushing the cup in his paw and tossing it into a trash bin a little farther away, landing it perfectly.

'Score! Also, trash bins in the streets of a medieval city… check,' Puss mused, amused by the absurdities of this world.

Lifting his leg, he dismounted smoothly from Tornado's saddle, his small boots softly thudding against the ground as he landed.

Turning, he calmly walked toward the cute, cozy little house and crouched down in front of it, wearing a curious expression.

From inside, he could hear high-pitched, noisy voices— giggling, crying, and also some sharp scolding from a voice that was less high-pitched, but still somewhat shrill.

His mouth twitched slightly as he raised his paw and carefully knocked on the tiny wooden door, making sure not to break it, then waited.

But suddenly, an irritated, shrill voice shouted from inside:

"Who is it?! If it's another salesman, I swear there'll be one less merchant in Far Far Away by the end of today!"

He heard a series of tiny footsteps approaching.

Soon, the door opened, and a small fairy in a green dress appeared, visibly pregnant, a cigarette dangling from her mouth, with several little fairy children clinging to her and clumped around her feet as they all stared at Puss.

The fairy—who seemed to be the mother of all those children—glared at Puss with deep dark circles under her eyes. But then, as she got a better look, she seemed impressed by the handsome, gallant cat. Still, her focus didn't linger on that for long; it quickly shifted to his boots, cape, hat, belt, and sword.

"You're… Puss?" she asked, stunned, recognizing some of her finest handiwork.

"Sí… you must be Señora Vivianne, correcto?" Puss nodded, asking while discreetly glancing, somewhat confused, at the children.

He hadn't known that Vivianne was a fairy— let alone that she had so many children. And despite her exhausted look, it was still clear she was very beautiful.

Vivianne nodded, then grabbed two children off her shoulders and set them down on the floor, followed by two from her waist, two from her arms, two from her legs, and one from her head.

In the end, along with those already on the ground, there were eleven children in total— and judging by her belly, one more was on the way.

"Children, go play inside. Rosetta, you take care of your siblings, don't let them cause trouble!" She turned to one of the older little fairies, who had brown hair, and ordered.

"Yes, Mommy!" The little fairy saluted confidently, hands on her waist and chest puffed out, then led her siblings back inside.

Vivianne watched them for a moment, and seeing they were following their sister, running and laughing, she sighed in relief and closed the door behind herself, leaning her back against it for a bit.

Taking a deep drag from her cigarette, the fairy pulled it from her mouth and exhaled the smoke, rubbing the side of her forehead with a headache.

Puss watched this, and her large pregnant belly.

"Smoking isn't good for the child," he couldn't help but point out.

But Vivianne simply waved her hand, unconcerned.

"It's not a regular cigarette, it's made from magic herbs, actually good for health. Now stop talking, I need a moment of silence," she explained indifferently, leaning her head back against the door and closing her eyes.

Helpless, Puss could only get up and stand by Tornado, gently stroking the horse's nose.

'She looks quite stressed. But it makes sense— eleven children isn't something anyone can handle easily. Let her have a bit of time for herself,' he thought, patiently waiting.

About five minutes later, Vivianne opened her eyes and pushed herself off the door, standing upright again.

"Sorry about that," she apologized to Puss, who turned his gaze back to her.

"It's alright," he nodded.

"So, why did you come looking for me?" she asked curiously.

Usually, when he had a request, he would send a messenger. This was the first time she had seen her wealthy client in person, and she only recognized him because of his gear.

"I have an important commission for you. Also, I want you to teach me enchantments," he explained with a serious look, as Vivianne fluttered her quick wings and flew up to hover right in front of Puss's face.

"My lessons aren't cheap," she raised an eyebrow at him.

"I've never paid you poorly," Puss grinned, amused.

"That's true," Vivianne chuckled, nodding as she accepted the request.

Though they hadn't met face to face before, she and Puss had corresponded through letters, and there was already a degree of trust between them as business partners.

Seeing her nod, Puss felt relieved. He had thought it might be more difficult— but with money, things often became easier.

Now that the main matter was settled, Puss couldn't help but ask something that had left him curious as he glanced at her pregnant belly.

"Señora Vivianne, if it's not too rude, allow me to ask. I always thought that a fairy was born from the first laugh of a baby…" Puss looked at her curiously but didn't finish the sentence, so as not to sound impolite.

What he said was enough to make the meaning clear.

Vivianne, who had been curiously listening to his question, suddenly froze— then her eyes went wide, and she covered her mouth with both hands.

"Pfff… hahaha!!" Her tiny flying body doubled over in laughter, twisting midair as she burst out laughing.

Despite her laugh being high-pitched— simply because she was so tiny— with Puss's sharp hearing, he could clearly hear the melodic tone of her voice as she laughed in amusement.

Puss scratched his head, confused. It was something he had heard in his previous life, when he learned about Tinker Bell— but clearly, that wasn't the case, judging by her reaction.

"Hahaha... haha… haah! Oh, my belly and jaw hurt from laughing so much. It's been a while since I laughed this hard hehe," Vivianne struggled to stop laughing, and when she finally did, she was still slightly breathless.

She rubbed her belly and jaw a little to ease the pain, then looked at Puss with a smile. Her pretty face looked much less tired after laughing so freely.

"Looks like you're still quite the innocent little kitty."

Vivianne teased, then explained.

"But you're not entirely wrong. When this little baby here smiles…" She shamelessly patted her little friend between her legs, "... a fairy is born. If you want, I can show you exactly what her smiling looks like." She winked at him playfully.

Puss's eyes widened, and he quickly waved both hands at her in panic.

"No, no, no es necesario!" he hastily refused.

His mouth twitched fiercely at the mischievous little fairy staring at him with that naughty glint.

For the first time, Puss found himself speechless before a beautiful woman inviting him to do adult things.

And it was a damn sexy pregnant fairy with eleven kids!