Konoha: Naruto's abnormal life choices

"So you're here to ask me to become the Hokage?"

In a quiet inn, Tsunade and Shizune were playing a casual game of poker with Naruto.

Shizune handled the cards and acted as the dealer, while Naruto and Tsunade played a guessing game—predicting whether the next card would be high (above seven) or low (below seven).

Naruto chose the opposite of Tsunade's guess every time. So far, he'd won all fifteen rounds in a row!

"Yes," Naruto replied. "Everyone in the village is waiting for you to come back, Lady Tsunade."

"I refuse," Tsunade said flatly, sipping her drink with a tipsy look in her eyes. "The title of Hokage is garbage. Only fools would want it."

Naruto didn't argue. He remained calm and collected. "Since Lady Tsunade doesn't want it, let's drop the subject and keep playing."

Tsunade was a little surprised by his reaction. "You're not going to argue?"

"Why would I? Everyone has different goals. Dreams aren't one-size-fits-all. I understand."

He continued betting against her. She called high, and he picked low.

As expected, he won again.

Luckily, they weren't betting money—if they were, Tsunade would've lost her entire purse by now.

"This is boring. I'm done playing," Tsunade huffed, throwing the cards aside. She leaned back on her hands and gazed at the ceiling.

The blinding whiteness made Naruto's eyes sting.

What a powerful illusion.

Shizune quietly cleaned up, placing the little pig down before tucking away the cards. Her long legs swayed slightly as she walked across the room.

Naruto's gaze subtly followed her for a moment, then returned to Tsunade. His expression remained noble—this was, after all, merely appreciation of the scenery.

The mood settled into silence. Tsunade eventually sat upright, a trace of melancholy in her eyes. "What's your dream, Naruto?"

Naruto gave it some serious thought. Tsunade had to be Hokage now—like it or not.

She and Jiraiya were the only viable options left in the village. But Jiraiya was better suited to operating outside of Konoha, gathering intelligence. That alone gave him justification to push Tsunade into the position.

Besides, was she truly unwilling?

If someone stronger or more senior were still around to shoulder the burden, Tsunade might have walked away. But with no one above her, could she really abandon the village?

This was her home.

After considering all that, Naruto replied with conviction: "My dream is to become Hokage."

"Tch," Tsunade smirked and gently tapped the tip of his nose. "I thought you'd be smarter. But it turns out you're just another idiot."

"I'm not an idiot. You are," Naruto retorted calmly.

She still didn't understand the depth behind his words.

Tsunade scoffed and ranted, "Anyone who wants to be Hokage is a fool. You included."

"Heh, you'll understand once you reach my age," Naruto replied with a faint smile, turning to look out the window.

The air outside was cold—Tansho Street had already begun showing signs of winter. Pink plum blossoms were blooming here and there.

Bai and the others should be arriving soon.

A chilly wind blew outside.

Tsunade followed his gaze. Her eyes softened with a mix of amusement and sadness.

He really reminded her of them.

The idealism of her younger brother Nawaki… the calm resolve of Dan…

The way Naruto looked at the world—it brought them both back at once.

She found herself wanting to look at him just a little longer.

With her slightly flushed cheeks and half-bitten lips, she looked absolutely captivating.

Naruto turned around—and was momentarily stunned.

Soon after, Tsunade shook her head. "Get some sleep. I'm tired too."

Naruto didn't stop her. As her footsteps faded, he immediately linked his consciousness to Bai.

A calm, almost watery voice echoed in his mind.

"Naruto-sama, we've arrived at Tansho Street. Should we meet now?"

"Not yet. Let's talk after things are set."

"Understood. When do we begin?"

"Right now." Naruto walked to the window and watched Tsunade disappear into the night.

After ending the link, he waited a moment longer before sneaking into Tsunade's room.

There, Shizune was fast asleep on the bed, holding her little pig in her arms. Whether she was drugged or simply knocked out was unclear, but she was completely defenseless.

"Tsunade really is careless," Naruto muttered. "If someone other than a gentleman like me showed up, she'd be in serious trouble."

He locked the door behind him, then leapt out the window and took off after Tsunade.

Orochimaru.

Last time, you nearly bit me. I saw your death flag flying.

Tonight, I'll teach you what it means to mess with someone vengeful and underhanded.

Tsunade moved quickly through the streets, her expression solemn.

This wasn't something she could entrust to anyone else. Orochimaru had contacted her earlier, promising that if she healed his arms, he would resurrect her brother Nawaki and her lover Dan.

That dangerous glimmer of hope had briefly taken root in her heart.

But now, Tsunade intended to crush that fantasy with her own hands.

She would kill Orochimaru and end the man who dared to prey on people's weaknesses.

Unbeknownst to her, Naruto was shadowing her from behind.

But he wasn't the only one.

Up ahead, Jiraiya was also following quietly. His posture looked normal—as if nothing had happened. Naruto instantly realized: he never drank the medicine Tsunade had given him.

This old bastard was just pretending to be drugged?

Why?

Did he want to get beat up by Orochimaru alongside Tsunade?

That's way too kinky.

Naruto didn't get other people's fetishes—and he judged them harshly.

Eventually, they left Tansho Street and arrived at the meeting point.

By then, the battle had already begun.

Tsunade was trading blows with Kabuto Yakushi.

Jiraiya, meanwhile, still hadn't made his move, hiding in the shadows.

Naruto had to circle around to get a better view of the fight.

He ducked behind a large rock. On the other side, Tsunade and Kabuto were locked in fierce combat. Orochimaru stood nearby, observing quietly with his usual eerie smile.

Even though no familiar spectators were around, Orochimaru still acted like a color commentator.

He detailed Tsunade's movements and even explained Kabuto's tactics, as if worried Tsunade wouldn't know how to counter them.

Eventually, Kabuto took a hard beating and stabbed himself with a kunai—blood splattering onto Tsunade and triggering her hemophobia.

That was when Jiraiya finally appeared.

But it was pointless.

Pretending to be cool didn't help. Kabuto took him down easily. His chakra scalpel sliced so deep, Jiraiya's blood sprayed several feet high.

Watching the crimson fountain, Naruto finally understood what Jiraiya had been planning.

"You… you're trying to use this fight to help Tsunade overcome her fear of blood?"

Naruto opened his palm. Crimson Nine-Tails chakra began to swirl around him.

He wasn't about to let Orochimaru escape this time.

All four directions—east, south, west, and north—were already secured.

Orochimaru… this time, you're not going anywhere.

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