LET'S GO GAMBLING! [OPM]

LET'S GO GAMBLING!

——————————————————

Kenshin was... happy. He was very happy. Cardcaster was an insanely useful ability to have. It had just about unlimited ammo, the only aspect of it that really drained his stamina was that he had to physically throw the cards he conjured. That was barely an issue though, if it was at all. His stamina was exceptional thanks to all that quick training and copious amounts of golden tickets he pumped into that attribute. 

One glaring factor in Cardcaster's nature was the luck aspect, the non-existent deck that he drew cards from worked just like a regular deck of playing cards, featuring 52 unique cards with their respective suit and colour. The same value cards of different suits were basically identical in both power and speed.

The ace was both the second strongest and weak card, with Kenshin having the ability to choose between its 1 or 11 value. It also had the unexpected benefit of being able to pierce and then explode inside of the target, although he wasn't successful in finding out this card's true limitation. Then there were the numbers, self-explanatory. Things started to get a bit fucky when it came to the jack, the queen and the king. 

Cardcaster didn't follow the rules of poker or any other card game, it simply assigned values to each card and special properties to more "valuable" cards. Jack for example could curve its trajectory mid-flight, like a guided missile. The queen could separate into three less powerful attacks, like a shotgun. And the king? The king was the most destructive when used for penetration, just like the ace with the exception being that the king cards didn't explode afterwards. 

If Kenshin had to compare them to something, it would be real-life ammunition. The ace was an armour-piercing explosive shell, the king was the best thing for just armour piercing, the queen was artillery, and the jack was a guided missile. 

If Cardcaster was an impressive ability before, it was absolutely busted now. The element of luck also provided a certain aspect of uncertainty, because Kenshin had to adapt on the fly. He didn't get to choose which card would manifest in his hand and could manifest up to 52 cards at once. 

Further testing also revealed something new. When Kenshin activated Cardcaster and materialised a card, that card being a simple 8 of hearts, the inscription upon it changed before his very eyes. 

It turned into a joker.

The usually burning card of magenta with white or black inscriptions representing its colour was now deep, dark red, with the image of the joker being scribbled onto it in black. Its lines were constantly fluctuating, like an animation drawn in a sketchbook.

"...I'm a bit scared to throw you..." and he had every right to be, the warehouse he was previously in no longer existed after just one queen. 

The whole ghost town probably shook when he threw just one queen, and knowing how bricked up the scaling was in cards whenever a joker was involved... Kenshin made the right decision to just admire the card instead of leaving a crater in Z-City's ghost town.

Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on your perspective, an actual target for his practice decided to just randomly appear behind him. 

"Honk, honk, mothafucka!"

Kenshin barely had enough time to whip around and bring his hands up as a massive fist the size of his torso barrelled into him. His body flew from the impact that generated a small shockwave, his arms stung but thankfully, he suffered no serious injury.

Then his back hit the wall and he flew through an abandoned building.

"Ugh!" he groaned, quickly picking himself off the floor, his brain now wired to think of only survival-critical thoughts, not of how he actually managed to brush off that attack without breaking any of his bones.

The building he flew through crashed to the ground, it was a small abandoned home, now nothing more than rubble and thankfully devoid of any life inside. Kenshin's assailant menacingly stood beyond the clearing cloud of dust and smoke, a huge, humanoid, extremely muscular...

"...I'm getting real tired of this shit...!"

...goose.

It was a humanoid goose with insanely powerful muscles and a humanoid body, its white-feathered wings on its back gave it an almost angelic appearance. If it wasn't so goofy-looking and ugly as shit.

 "Come, humie! Let us do battle!"

It screamed, pounding its chest like a gorilla with its oversized arms that were comparable to tree trunks. The impact generated small shockwaves, scattering any residual plumes of dust in the area. 

Kenshin knew this goose-thing was stronger than the deer by sheer instinct. It was agile, it was deceptively quiet evident by it sneaking up on him, it was strong as fuck and probably fast too. 

But he had an ace up his sleeve.

Or in this case...

"I'm a midnight thinker~ I'm a smoker~"

The goose monster just looked at Kenshin clumsily singing with a confused look, "What the fuck are you doing-"

"I'm a joker~"

A flick, a short whiz, and a streak of red mixed with tinges of black. Then the world split in two.

~S̷̡̰͍̻̠̖̭̰̠͑͆́̋͜Ḩ̷̯̩̹͔̳̣̞͎͓̀͗̀̆͆͐̎͆̔͘͠Ḯ̷̯͚̖̗̪̥̭͍̭̳̈́͛̈́̚͘Ḿ̴̺̹̣͚̞̘͔̠̗̣͊̒̔̂̈́́̈́̏͑̑̿̆͝Į̵̢͖̼̞̱͉̥̫̅́̎͆͋̂ͅM̶̪̳̫͓̭͑̎͐̋̌͋̀̀͗̂͐̈́͘̚Î̷̢̫̠̦̠͇͖̯͍͈̹͍̐͑̚͜M̶̖̣̞̜̪̜͔̥͉̘̟͈̞̔̑̒̅̍͒̎͂͛̕̚̚͜͝I̴͕̺̟͚̅̿M̴̡̢̛̯̙̮͖̹̭̤͎̊̐͗͌̏̎͌̈́̕̚͜ͅͅI̸̛̩͉̤̽͗͗͆̇͑M̴̧̜͕̤̭̮̪͔̑̾͋́̋͗͐̏́̆I̶͓͉͍̹̲̻̺͖̪̺̟̟̪̐̅͐~

Thin, ball joint-connected hands of pure porcelain tore a hole in the world. A wound upon reality itself. Glowing cross-shaped eyes of pure, actual gold appeared from the darkness within. Something stirred, and a gentle breeze of cold air emerged from within, chilling to the very soul. 

It lumbered forward, a being of wood, metal, porcelain, and cloth. Taller than a monster, smaller than a giant. With thin limbs, it trudged forth with darkness clinging to its skin like liquid. Its feet, clad in oversized and extremely colourful shoes touched onto the ground with a dull thud, its body now fully revealed. 

It was a strange thing to behold. Built like a marionette of a clown, or a jester, with bright but dulled colours. On its head, a cap and bells of several colours, mainly dark purple and bright pink. A low chime came from the bells as the figure stared at the goose monster.

The Joker had no face, its features hidden behind a faux mask of joy with two teardrops under its right eye. Its mouth was drawn in a perpetual smile. The bright, glowing eyes of pure gold gazed on with eternal malice.

"Shit dawg, I didn't know we were playing Pokemon-!"

-SWING-

-SPLERGH!-

And a deep thud. In the blink of an eye, the weird-looking goose monster was cut in two with a single swipe of an extremely large scythe. Kenshin couldn't even see where the puppet even pulled that thing from, it just appeared in the blink of an eye. Its blade, large and twice as long as the Joker itself, looked to be comprised of several segmented pieces of different coloured metal, like a piece of fabric stitched together by a caring mother.

With another swing, the Joker impaled one-half of the goose monster on its blade and then stabbed the other half with the bottom of its handle. Then it turned, briefly locking its golden eyes full of acrimony with Kenshin's own.

And left.

It moved like a puppet, as expected given its appearance, and was gone faster than it appeared, walking through the same tear in the fabric of reality it came through.

All was silent.

Then...

"...That was so fucking cool..."

——————————————————