Madness of Regret

I swear I could see the seagulls get scared and fly higher. I didn't even think I could shout so loud. 

Deep breath. Deep breathe. 

One leg done another left. Fuck. 

The things a man will do to resolve a regret. 

Deep breath. Deep breathe. I gotta do it fast before my muscles heal or some shit. 

Torso once more perpendicular or at least how much I could. Looks like I really tore muscles in my right hand. My right hand didn't weigh me down as usual. I caught the jeans of the right leg. 

Deep breathe. I did my fucking best to lift it up. Every centimeter it lifted up I could feel my neck pull some blood vessels and muscles. When it was lifted high enough. I hugged it as much as I could.

I felt the right arm muscles tear even more. The right femur hit the hip more forcefully than the left one. Fuck the femur was going right instead of left because of the hug.

I needed a solution to make it go left. And I had one.

I needed to open my legs. I joked. I really should have learned yoga to do the same for others wife. 

Deep breath. Loosen the hug and slowly push the right leg towards the right. It not a nice day to realign your legs if the femur doesn't touch your hip when doing so. Yea I felt the femur grazing the hip and when I found the place I thought was the hip joint. I pushed my leg.

MOTHER FATHER!

Then I let go of my arm and torso and fell to the raft. I hit my head against the raft with a thud. Yea one more bad decision. At least I didn't feel much pain as my legs, neck and the right hand torn muscles kept me busy in that department. 

Deep breath. Deep breath. And start cursing to the high heavens to keep away the pain.

I started having trouble even taking deep breath. Why? Did it happen cause of the pain? 

I felt my left hand get a bit wet. Now the watery wet but a viscous wet. I raised my hand to the sky and a drop fell on my eye. 

I tried to clean it but more got in my face. This smell. I know it. Blood. 

The carcass should have no blood. Most of it should have been swept away by the ocean and eaten by the seagulls. And I didn't see any injured seagulls a while ago. So only one logical conclusion is there. I am the one the blood is dripping from.

Since it was near my elbow. The bleeding spot should be near my chest. I tried lifting my head despite the neck pain. I couldn't see it clearly with one eye soaked in blood and another a bit clean. 

I lifted my torso once again. And then I saw it. The blood was coming out from my chest. More specifically, from the place my bone shards stabbed. 

And seeing that my right leg is more covered in blood than the left one. I have a hunch that it was when I hugged my right leg during realignment. 

Fuck, I don't even know if the bone shard punctured my organs or a blood vessel or muscles. 

Emergency medicare 101: You don't take out something that has stabbed you. It just would lead to more bleeding. 

If I try to take out the bone shard, barring any accidents, the blood spilled would be even more. If there are accidents I could mess up my heart and lungs.

Do I just let it be? Do I have anymore options? 

Think. Think. It's been around few minutes since I fixed my right leg. So, by logic if I have cut open a artery or punctured my lungs or harmed my heart, I should be dead either by blood loss or heart failure or problems related to breathing.. 

Yet, I am not. So, chances are high that the bone shard might have just lodged deep in my muscles. 

I should just let it be. No other option seems viable. I don't have the expertise nor do I have professional healthcare. Should I just shout there is oil and hope I hear the sound of freedom? 

Dying like this after all that drama. Yea, it doesn't suit me. But you play with the card dealt. Fuck, I am at least gonna bluff my way out of it.

I gotta up my chances of survival. By deceit or will.

I need to drink my own blood as much as I could. 

I placed my hand on the blood puddle formed. I then took my hand and dripped the blood into my mouth. Drop by drop. 

It tasted salty. Saltier than usual. Which was unusual.

It shouldn't have been that salty.

I have cut my fingers several time and licked and sucked the blood out so many time that I know of the taste. 

So what could it be? 

As I was thinking, a small wave of water came to the raft touching my legs. And a light bulb light up.

Seawater. It was salty cause cause of the ocean salt content. 

More salt means I cant drink a lot otherwise my mouth becomes dry. Does it work for blood though? 

Whatever I don't have the luxury for tomorrow. I need to drink more blood before it attracts some apex predator. 

Really don't want to see a voodoo, black magic infused great white shark to come after me cause of my blood. Though I would pay money to see it. I wouldn't want to live it.

I need something to soak the blood and I can squeeze it to drink blood more efficiently. My shirt its in my right hand covering my hand. And I don't think I have enough health point to reach other and untie it. 

Barring any accidents or more bones shard making a mess in my chest. I can't risk it. 

So yea, drink it drop by drop while it drips from my finger. Would have been much more sexier if it was done by a girl.

Just my luck, I guess.

I am drinking by myself under the sunny sky in a boat left to my own thoughts. Such a dream. 

I gotta stay like this for a long time so that the seagulls don't peek inside my chest for some snacks.

Yea what a bore. Can't move. Can't do anything. Except think. 

Seagulls. How long do they fly in the sky? A day? A week? Come on National Geographic, tell me. Youtube shorts? All I can remember about seagulls are that they steal food from tourists and residents. 

If I remember something from Animal Planet or Discovery, its that seagulls sometimes rest on the water surface and shark hunt them down. Looking at the amount of seagulls and my blood dripping on the ocean. 

There is a high chance a shark might follow me. A shark should be more dangerous than the dinosaur bastard, right? 

A shark hunts alone. With the depth as its cover, it is more attuned to the ocean than the dinosaur bastard with their legs. All it needs to do is give a powerful raft flip and I am done. 

Or something like a killer whale wave making. 

The shark doesn't normally hunt humans because humans are not full with fat like seals. And judging from the ocean temperature its warm. So chances are high that there is no seals in this part of ocean meaning lower chances of great white shark or predator that hunts seals. So no killer whales, no great white shark and other apex predators.

If the modern world logic works. 

I hope it does. I really don't want some megladon, pack of piranhas after me. That dinosaur like bastard was enough. 

By modern world logic, shark will eat an easy meal whatever it is #me but it should not do that big of a work if it is a human. I hope. 

No shark are not the biggest menace of the ocean. It's the motherfucking dolphin. I don't want to be raped by an aquatic mammal. 

As cute and friendly they are I don't want them trying to dry-water-hump me. I am no instagram horny woman who would laugh at it and remember it as the 'dolphins love me', 'I am a animal lover'. 

Speaking of animal lover, What about PETA? 

If they knew I killed a dinosaur bastard, would they harass me like the nowadays woke protest? I would be in no financial condition to repaint my home hour by hour. 

PETA is so woke that they would marry a pedophile than a person who eats meat. And shout at least I don't eat meat like they did the human civilization as a whole a favor.

Truth aside. The only sea creature that ever was a threat to me was the dinosaur bastard. And I have a feeling that more are going to join the list. That bastard looked like a dinosaur, an unscientific dinosaur. Like how could that bastard have a fish tail that was above his body. It wouldn't be streamlined. Heck it would look like a komodo dragon if it had a tail and a snake tongue. 

Fuck! it really looks like a komodo dragon aside from its red bottom and all that scales. A bright red bottom while they swim at the surface. Evolution hasn't been real kind to these bastard.

So a single komodo bastard has an area of hunting, are intelligent, can communicate with its species, hunt together and are resourceful. Even if they are predator of the sea they are a bit above the bottom predator. 

In this ocean without plastic, clean water and whatnot most apex predator species can afford to be lenient with their hunts. And since every komodo bastard I have seen is like one and a half meter, in a way they are thriving. 

But if you are a apex predator in the ocean, you are in the depths not on the surface. 

A bottom feeder predator, my first hunt, how memorable. 

I really want to see some blue whales, some humpback whale doing a back flip before I die of this blood loss or the sun or any other reason.

The whales should be much bigger, right? In this clean crystal water, if they can't be bigger than their modern counterpart it would be a shame. Would love it if there were whale shark swimming gently. 

A pack of whales migrating would be a sight to see. A sperm whale fighting a giant squid. A sperm whale fighting an even giant squid. Yea I would love to see it. Would be a better alternative to passing time while dying from blood loss. 

A giant sperm whale fighting the kraken. Damn now that's a Monsters: King of the depth kinda movie. A giant tiger pistol shrimp with 20/20 vision versus a giant mantis shrimp. 

No matter how cool it would, I would rather watch it from a TV. 

Tiger pistol shrimp, one of the strongest creature gram for gram. Imagining it at 200 meter big with a perfect vision for water. It would produce sound strong enough to kill most if not all within its reach. Fuck given enough time it could even be a fake continent level threat.

Mantis shrimp, can produce a shock wave with the temperature of the surface of the sun at an length of 20-25 cm. At 200 meter, damn its shock wave temperature might even be even higher. With eyes that are said to see even the color of the soul, it can also be an fake continent level threat.

What an idea for a movie. If done nicely not like nowadays modern films, it will be a masterpiece. 

Sad that the shrimps would not be that big and happy that they don't grow that big. 

All the fantasy and movie director thoughts aside, I really want to see a pod of whales when I heal and if I can I would ride it like aquaman at war.

An geyser. Wow, would you look at that. 

Fuck! A geyser in the ocean. Whales. 

Me and my big crow mouth.