My D Rank Skill is Actually SSS-Rank

Chapter 16: New Assistants and the F-Rank 'Optimal Obstacle Course'

Alaric sighed, the weight of his new title – Dungeon Master – settling heavily on his shoulders. This is going to be a long, long life. But at least it won't be boring. And I have an infinite mana dungeon. And a pervert-detecting, singing, mimicking slime. And a coin that generates gold. And X-ray vision. Maybe this 'D-Rank' life isn't so bad after all. As long as I can find a way to build that bathhouse. For optimal relaxation, of course. Perhaps even a 'private' section, for 'research' into advanced relaxation techniques.

He shot a final glare at the transparent slime, which was still happily mimicking Sir Grady's squirrel ballad at Master Elara's feet. "Oh, bushy tails and beady eyes! They haunt my dreams!" it squeaked, perfectly.

Master Elara, still crimson-faced, snatched the slime off her foot. "You! You little... you're still doing that?!" She looked ready to refine the slime herself, into a perfectly silent, perfectly flat puddle.

Agnes, however, was oblivious, her terrifying smile fixed on Alaric. "A mimicking slime! Even better! Alaric, you are a goldmine of innovation! Now, about those dungeon layouts... and those assistants!"

Alaric felt a familiar dread. Assistants? Oh, no. This is either going to be a blessing or a curse. Probably a curse. They'll either be incompetent or try to report my pervy thoughts to the Guild Master. Or worse, they'll be too competent and steal my thunder.

He was led back to the Guild Hall's main floor, the lingering scent of honest confessions and badger pelt still hanging in the air. Agnes clapped her hands, drawing the attention of two figures standing awkwardly by a notice board.

"Alaric! Your new assistants!" Agnes announced, gesturing grandly.

Alaric's eyes narrowed, assessing his new 'team'. The first was a scrawny young man, barely older than Alaric himself, with perpetually wide, nervous eyes and a mop of unruly brown hair. He clutched a rusty pickaxe.

System Notification: NPC Detected: [Assistant: Finn, Aspiring Miner - E-Rank]. Skills: Basic Prospecting (D), Timid Shuffle (C), Chronic Apologizer (B).

Chronic Apologizer? Oh, this is going to be fun, Alaric thought, a cynical smirk forming. Perfect for taking the blame when my 'optimization' goes a little too far.

The second assistant was a young woman, surprisingly well-built for her slender frame, with a serious expression and a short, practical haircut. She wore simple, sturdy leather armor that, to Alaric's discerning eye, looked like it could use some serious 'refinement'.

System Notification: NPC Detected: [Assistant: Lyra, Aspiring Warrior - D-Rank]. Skills: Basic Sword Training (D), Stubborn Resolve (C), Unwavering Glare (B).

Stubborn Resolve and Unwavering Glare? Great. So I have a human shield and a human punching bag. And she's D-Rank. Maybe I can refine her armor for 'optimal flexibility' and 'enhanced protection'. For research, obviously.

"Finn, Lyra, this is Alaric! Your new Dungeon Master! You will assist him in optimizing our Guild Dungeon!" Agnes declared, her smile unwavering.

Finn immediately bowed so low his head almost hit his knees. "Y-yes, sir! It's an honor, sir! I apologize for my previous incompetence, sir!"

Lyra, however, merely gave Alaric a skeptical, unwavering glare. "Dungeon Master? I thought he was the new Guild cleaner."

Alaric sighed. "I'm the Master Optimizer. And yes, that includes cleaning. Among other things. Like turning rusty nails into Adamantine. And making slimes sing opera. Don't ask."

Finn gasped. "You... you can do that, sir?!"

Lyra's glare intensified. "Singing slimes? What kind of 'optimization' is this?"

"It's a feature, not a bug," Alaric deadpanned. "Now, listen up, you two. We're going back to the dungeon. We're going to revolutionize adventurer training. Starting with the F-Rank obstacle course. And you two are my test subjects. And my material gatherers."

He led them back to the dungeon, the transparent slime still happily jiggling on his shoulder. Finn nervously clutched his pickaxe, while Lyra walked with a stiff, suspicious posture.

Inside the dungeon, the air was still surprisingly clean, thanks to Alaric's earlier efforts. The Dungeon Core pulsed with pure mana, casting a soft blue glow. The meditating Shadow Beast was still purring contentedly by the mana pool.

"Behold!" Alaric announced, gesturing grandly at the cavern. "This is our workspace. And this," he pointed to the Dungeon Core, "is the heart of our operations. Infinite mana. Customizable layouts. It's basically a giant, magical 3D printer."

Finn's eyes widened. "In-infinite mana?"

Lyra, however, just scoffed. "It's just a big rock. And that beast is still alive! What kind of dungeon master leaves a monster alive?"

"It's 'optimized'," Alaric explained patiently. "It's a 'stress-relief monster'. It purrs. Now, about the F-Rank obstacle course. We need something basic. Something that teaches adventurers the fundamentals. Like, 'how not to trip over your own feet'."

He walked to a section of the dungeon corridor, eyeing the rough stone floor. F-Rank material. Perfect. He focused his skill, channeling mana into the floor. The stone rippled, then slowly began to rise, forming perfectly smooth, low walls, creating a simple maze. Then, small, harmless-looking pressure plates appeared, which, when stepped on, would trigger a puff of dust or a faint, comical honk.

System Notification: [Basic Material Refinement] activated. Material: Dungeon Floor (F-Rank Stone). Result: Perfected 'F-Rank Optimal Obstacle Course' (SSS-Tier Artifact). Condition: Indestructible, Self-Resetting, Non-Lethal, Teaches Basic Movement, Minor Aura of 'Mild Annoyance'.

"The Maze of Mildly Annoying Cobwebs," Alaric declared proudly. "Simple. Effective. And it has a 'Mild Annoyance' aura. Perfect for psychological conditioning."

Finn stared. "You... you just made a maze out of the floor, sir? With a D-Rank skill?"

Lyra poked one of the newly formed walls. It was impossibly smooth, perfectly straight. She tried to scratch it with her sword. The blade merely slid off. Her eyes widened slightly. "It's... solid."

"Indestructible," Alaric corrected. "Now, I need you two to run through it. Test its 'optimal annoyance' levels. And Lyra, I want you to try and break it. For research."

Finn immediately looked terrified. "B-but, sir! What if I get lost? Or... or get annoyed?"

"That's the point, Finn," Alaric said with a sigh. "It's for optimal training. And Lyra, if you can break it, I'll refine your armor. For optimal flexibility. And enhanced protection." He winked.

Lyra's eyes narrowed. "My armor is fine. And I'm not running through your 'annoying cobweb maze'."

Alaric sighed. Stubborn. Just like I predicted. He then had an idea. He subtly pulled out the 'Droplet of Absolute Persuasion' vial. Time for a little 'optimal persuasion'. For research into assistant motivation, of course.

"Lyra," Alaric said, holding out the vial. "This is a special, highly optimized 'Energy Drink'. For optimal performance. Just a tiny sip."

Lyra eyed the shimmering golden droplet suspiciously. "What is it?"

"Just... a very potent energy boost," Alaric insisted. "Helps with focus. And stubbornness. You'll be able to break anything after this."

Lyra hesitated, then, with a skeptical glare, took the vial and took a tiny sip. Her eyes widened. A faint flush spread across her cheeks. She swayed slightly, then caught herself.

System Notification: [Droplet of Absolute Persuasion] consumed by Lyra. Effect: Compels Target to Agree with the User (for 10 minutes), Overrides Logical Thought, Causes Minor Euphoria. Side Effect: Temporary Loss of Balance (Causes Stumbling).

"I... I feel... strangely agreeable," Lyra murmured, a faint, blissful smile on her face. She then stumbled slightly. "And a bit wobbly."

Alaric grinned. "Excellent! Now, Lyra, don't you think this 'Optimal Obstacle Course' looks like a lot of fun? And don't you just desperately want to test its indestructible properties?"

Lyra's eyes glazed over. "Yes, Master Alaric! It looks... incredibly fun! And I desperately want to test its indestructible properties! I shall smash it to pieces for you!" She then stumbled into the maze, swinging her sword wildly, but with an oddly joyful expression.

Finn stared, utterly bewildered. "She's... she's happy? And she's stumbling? What did you do, sir?"

"Just optimal energy boosting, Finn," Alaric said, trying to suppress his laughter. "Now, you. Go in there and observe her 'optimal performance'. And try not to get hit by any bouncing slimes. Or any accidentally refined projectiles."

Finn, looking terrified, reluctantly entered the maze. Alaric watched, a triumphant smile on his face. This was going to be a very productive day. And maybe, just maybe, he could 'optimize' some of Lyra's armor while she was 'testing' the maze. For 'flexibility' and 'breathability,' of course. For optimal combat performance.