Naruto: Konoha’s Trickster, Starting as the Seven-Tails Jinchūriki

The case was solved. But why wasn't there any smell of medicine in the military rations pill?

Kazuyama's shoulders heaved as he gasped for air, his face drenched in tears from crying his heart out. How could this happen? Someone as cautious as him, just an observer, somehow got tangled up in all this chaos!

Suddenly, a notification rang in his head:

"Ding! Host's actions detected: Using laxatives to poison Fugaku Uchiha, leaving him suffering from agonizing diarrhea at the hospital! Perfect 'Menace to Society' reward granted – Tailed Beast Transformation Proficiency +30! (Note: Reach 100 to unlock Tailed Beast Bombs)"

Damn! What a generous bonus! But the situation is terrifying!

That bastard Fugaku actually went straight to the hospital? Did the combination of those three medicines have such a potent effect? It's over. It's completely over!

Hearing the prompt, Kazuyama cried even louder, his sobs echoing in the room.

"Kazuyama, stop crying! What's wrong?"

"Is there something wrong with the military rations pill I made?"

Pakura had never seen a grown man bawl like this, and she started to panic.

Meanwhile, Kushina and Minato exchanged knowing glances, snacking on melons as if watching a drama unfold. Minato, particularly unfazed, casually enjoyed the military rations pill he had picked up earlier.

Kazuyama opened his mouth several times to respond, but no words came out. The bitterness in his heart was too much to put into words.

Just then, a frantic voice sounded from outside the house.

"Kushina, are you there? Sister Pakura, are you there?"

"Something's happened! Don't eat that medicinal herb! It's not a tonic—it's a laxative!!!"

"Brother Fugaku has been hospitalized!"

Mikoto's anxious voice carried through the door.

Minato, who was just about to toss another military rations pill into his mouth, froze mid-motion, his hand trembling. He turned toward the door, his expression shifting rapidly.

Pakura and Kushina also stared in the direction of the sound, their curiosity piqued.

Moments later, Mikoto burst in, her face drenched in sweat as she yelled into the room.

"Laxative... laxative?!"

Minato slowly swallowed the pill in his mouth, his face going pale as the bitter taste hit him. His eyes dropped to the pink bag he held in his hand. Then, he turned his gaze to Kazuyama, who was now crying even harder than before. Realization dawned.

"Kazuyama! You bastard! Was it you who set this trap?!"

Why did Kazuyama react so strongly after the military rations pill? Why had Fugaku been hospitalized after taking one?

All signs pointed to Kazuyama.

Pakura and Kushina also turned their attention to him, their faces filled with suspicion.

Under the intense scrutiny of the three, Kazuyama finally stopped crying. But what was the point of tears now? The pill had already been eaten. It was too late for anything.

"Kazuyama, are you responsible for this?"

"I knew something was wrong that day!"

Pakura suddenly recalled the suspicious behavior of the shop owner when she bought the medicine. The realization hit her like a thunderbolt. Her eyes flared with anger as she glared at the young man before her, his face still streaked with tears.

"Ahhhh! You asshole!"

"Kazuyama! You made me buy laxatives instead of military rations pills!"

Meanwhile, Kushina, her hair practically flying from rage, turned to Minato with a mix of fury and worry. "Minato! Are you okay?"

Minato stood frozen, staring at the half-empty bag of military rations pills in his hand. His face paled. He looked like a man staring directly into the gates of hell.

"Kushina, Sister Pakura…" Mikoto's voice trembled as she surveyed the tense scene in the courtyard. "They… they didn't already eat them, did they?"

Kushina and Pakura's glares bore into Kazuyama with renewed intensity.

Kazuyama trembled from head to toe, but not because of their furious stares. The laxatives' effects were kicking in, twisting his stomach in knots.

Minato wasn't faring any better. He doubled over, sweat beading on his forehead. His voice cracked as he shouted, "You bastard, Kazuyama! Where's your toilet?!"

With his face ghostly pale, Minato trembled as he bolted toward the house.

"Ding! Host's actions detected: Using laxatives to poison Minato Namikaze, leaving him in agonizing diarrhea and embarrassing himself in front of his loved one! Perfect 'Menace to Society' reward granted – Tailed Beast Transformation Proficiency +30! (Note: Reach 100 to unlock Tailed Beast Bombs)"

The system's cheerful tone rang mockingly in Kazuyama's head. His face twisted into a smile more hideous than crying as cramps wracked his body. Unable to hold back any longer, he sprinted toward the toilet.

The rest of the group stood in stunned silence. They exchanged looks—Mikoto to Kushina, Kushina to Pakura—and finally all of them turned their collective gaze back to Kazuyama's retreating figure.

"Kazuyama, you bastard!!!"

…

Konoha Hospital.

The hospital, originally established alongside Konohagakure, initially lacked the medical expertise and staff to function effectively. Over time, thanks to Tsunade's groundbreaking medical ninjutsu and innovative medical systems, it underwent a transformation. A series of medical reforms were implemented, resources were allocated to establish medical teams and specialized training programs, and even a drug research and development department was created. After a decade of growth, Konoha Hospital had become one of the village's most vital institutions.

Today, however, it welcomed three patients suffering from the exact same ailment.

The attending doctor couldn't help but sigh. "These days, even taking laxatives seems to happen in groups."

In the ward.

Three hospital beds were lined up from left to right, with Fugaku lying in the first bed, Kazuyama in the second, and Minato in the third. The window was to the left, and the door stood to the right.

Standing by their bedsides were Mikoto, Pakura, and Kushina, along with a doctor and a nurse.

The doctor spoke, holding a clipboard in one hand. "Hemp seed, apricot kernel, and arborvitae seed—all laxatives—were mixed together and consumed as military ration pills. What were you thinking?" He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Who on earth prescribed such a dangerous combination?"

The room fell silent as everyone turned to look at Kazuyama, whose face flushed with embarrassment. He looked like he wished he could disappear into thin air.

"That's enough," the doctor said finally, gesturing to the IV bags hooked up to the patients. "There are 15 IV bags in total to flush the residual effects of the medicine from your systems. This so-called 'doctor' is terrifying. If you had taken just a little less of any one of these three medicines, you would've needed 10 fewer IV bags."

He sighed heavily and added, "Medicine isn't simple arithmetic. The combination of these three ingredients amplified the laxative effect by at least tenfold."

With a final look of exasperation at the group, the doctor left the room, muttering to himself.

As the door clicked shut, a chorus of angry roars erupted from the room.

"Bastard! When I get out of this hospital, I'll sharpen my sword and kill you!" Fugaku growled, his Sharingan blazing with fury.

"Kazuyama! How could you do this to me? You even drugged me!" Minato shouted, his face pale and voice trembling with betrayal.

"Kazuyama! When you're better, I'll make sure you can't leave the hospital without eating even more peppers!" Kushina snapped, glancing worriedly at Minato as she spoke.

"Hmph! Fugaku, when you get out, I'll help you sharpen your sword!" Mikoto added, her voice cold as she glared at Kazuyama.

Pakura shook her head in disbelief. "Seeing you like this, I've realized something. You're not a person anymore… no, you can't even be called a person."

Kazuyama groaned internally, his stomach still twisting in knots. One wrong move in chess leads to losing the entire game…

From deep inside him, Chōmei's laughter echoed. "That was amazing! Hahaha! Kazuyama, we've got to do this again sometime!"

"Ding! The host's outrageous poisoning antics have successfully enraged five individuals, bringing immense satisfaction to the system. As recognition for the host's unwavering commitment to chaos, a special reward is granted: Tailed Beast Transformation Proficiency +30! (Note: Reach 100 to unlock the Tailed Beast Bomb.)"