Netkama Punch!!!

"Are you insane?"
If we did things the way he said, it’d mean getting less than four hours of sleep a night. As someone who had to work a day job, that was physically impossible.

I grimaced and shook my head violently.
"I can’t. I’ve got work."
"You hit max level while working before."

"And I nearly fucking died, so I swore I’d never do that again."
Shin Heejae clicked his tongue as he watched me firmly reject the idea. I wondered for a second if maybe he’d been joking even a little, but judging by how annoyed he looked, he was genuinely planning to grind [Arcadia] dungeons with me all day long.
I couldn’t help myself—I blurted it out.

"That... girl who just called. Yuna, right? Why don’t you just go with her?"
"……."
The moment I said her name, his expression stiffened. Seeing that, I thought maybe I’d stepped out of line—but for some reason, my mouth kept running on its own.

"She seemed like she really wanted to play with you. Wouldn’t it be better if you did this with someone who actually wants to—"
"I said I’m doing it with Kim Seyoung."
He cut me off and stared straight at me, resolute. That cocky, obviously-butthurt tone was unmistakable.

It finally hit me that I’d fucked up, so I shut up. But in the end, I had to endure his foul mood all evening.
* * *
"Fucking brat…"

I muttered under my breath, spitting the words out like venom as I rinsed the body wash foam off under the shower.
Getting back into gaming after so long had turned into a complete nightmare.
Shin Heejae kept picking fights with me nonstop. The second I lagged even a bit, he’d go full drill sergeant on me. The guy hadn’t even served in the military, but his tone when nagging was so identical to a senior soldier it gave me goosebumps.

Eventually, I gave in and made a sub-character. The real joke, though, was Heejae deleting one of his own perfectly fine characters just so he could raise a new one alongside me.
As a ranked player, he had all his character slots filled. So when he couldn’t make another, he just deleted one that hadn’t hit max level yet.
I wanted to stop him—there was no need to go that far—but arguing with him always turned into a fight, and I didn’t have the energy to go another round.
On top of that, he insisted I name my sub-character something stupid like [Senyangie]. It was painfully obvious he wanted it to match his own sub-character, so I sneered and ignored him.

‘What kind of dumbass name is -nyangie, fuck… That’s the kind of shit only otaku would use—’
‘Then how about [HeejaeWifeySeyoungie]?’
‘…….’

A person with even a shred of dignity couldn’t win that battle.
And to make it worse, the new character name Shin Heejae picked for himself was [SeyoungiesHusband].
I threatened him that I wouldn’t go hunting with him if he kept that kind of name… but I lost again. The bastard would drag mobs from across the whole map just to trap me in a monster wave and let me die over and over again.

When I couldn’t take it anymore and threw my mouse, he grabbed his car keys and raged about going to a service center. I gave up and leveled up with [SeyoungiesHusband].
I did, at least, get one condition out of him: I begged him not to add our sub-characters to [Degeuldegeul]. I couldn’t take the cold stares from the guild any longer. Thankfully, he agreed, and I could finally play in peace.
After losing my entire evening to that bastard, I felt my eyelids drooping. It felt like I’d stayed up three nights in a row. While Heejae was out of the room, I rushed to finish my shower.

Beep. Beep-beep-beep. Click—
I heard the front door open while I was still in the shower. He’d remembered the password I gave him. I turned off the water without thinking.
But then...

Bang—!
A sudden thudding sound, followed by the bathroom door swinging wide open.
Furious that he’d barge in without a word, I turned around—and there he was, frowning in the doorway. Before I could curse him out, he let out a heavy sigh.

"I thought you ran away."
"Are you fucking crazy?"
"……."

I glared at him and turned to leave, but his gaze kept following me. Irritated, I wrapped a towel around my waist and snapped.
"What the fuck are you staring at?"
For a split second, I caught the sight of his ears turning red. It was the first time I’d ever seen him that flustered, and weirdly, it made me go, ‘What the hell…?’

The mood, which was seconds away from turning very strange, shattered instantly thanks to his snide comment.
"What? It’s not like there’s anything to see."
"Wanna fucking die, you little shit?!"

I lunged at him, trying to grab the back of his head, but the bastard dodged just in time. In the cramped room, he scrambled away and yanked open a drawer, then tossed me a towel.
"Put something on, will you?"
Then, taking advantage of my hesitation, he bolted into the bathroom. Instead of pounding on the locked door in retaliation, I simply flipped off the water boiler.

‘Enjoy your icy shower, asshole.’
But Shin Heejae didn’t come out quickly. No shriek of "Ah! It’s freezing!"—nothing.
Eventually, after what felt like ages, he returned looking like death itself. His face was pale, and he stared at me before scowling.

"God, this is pissing me off. It’s not like you’re even glamorous…"
"What?"
"…Forget it."

He grumbled some nonsense and turned on the hair dryer. Even while drying his hair, he kept glaring at me, so I glared right back. But, at least until we went to sleep, he left me alone.
The real problem started once we lay down for bed.
"Noona."

I’d turned away from the lights and curled up, but he called to me from behind.
That familiar "noona" was getting under my skin. It didn’t help that he’d ogled my body and made a comment earlier.
So I tried to fake being asleep, but of course, he wouldn’t leave me alone.

Poke—
I felt his foot nudge my side and turned around. Even in the dark, I had no trouble spotting his eyes—it was a sight I’d grown used to.
Just like I thought, he’d stretched his leg out to tap me with his toes. I immediately warned him.

"If I get up, I’m gonna kill you."
Unbothered by my threats, he said something totally out of left field.
"Do you wanna come up and sleep on the bed?"

"What?"
"I’m cold."
His voice had a nasal softness to it, like he was on the verge of sniffling. It didn’t feel like he was joking.

‘Well, I did turn off the hot water, and he stayed in there forever…’
It was mid-season, and the house only had the floor heating running. We weren’t using the electric blanket, so he was curled up on the bed with just a single thin sheet.
So I figured he meant we should switch places—he’d sleep on the warm floor while I took the bed. Honestly, I was relieved. I preferred sleeping in a bed anyway.

I answered without much thought.
"Sure."
"……."

But even after I offered to switch, he didn’t say a word. It was too dark to read his face, but it felt like he froze a little.
I got up and approached him. As I neared, he slowly backed away, pressing himself against the wall.
His retreat made me frown. He didn’t move after that—just sat there. I narrowed my eyes in confusion and tilted my head.

"What are you doing?"
"…Huh?"
"—? Move."

"……."
After a pause, Shin Heejae quietly got up and gave up his spot. I sat down in his place, and even though the mattress was cheap, the bounce of the springs felt like heaven after so long.
‘Yeah, I definitely sleep better on a bed…’

I was stretching with satisfaction when it happened.
Creak—
Shin Heejae, who should’ve been getting off the bed, suddenly sat back down next to me. And then, before I could react, he rolled up in the blanket—dragging the entire thing over to his side.

I turned to him in shock.
"Hey! What the hell are you doing?"
Peeking out from the blanket, he played dumb.

"I can’t sleep on the floor."
"Then why’d you ask to switch?!"
"I didn’t ask to switch. I said, ‘Do you wanna sleep up here with me?’"

"What?"
Absolutely not.
He wasn’t obese or anything, but he was a big guy. Two adult men sleeping on a double bed together was gross and uncomfortable. Even if we were "dating" as a cover, this was definitely crossing a line.

‘This is literally gay!’
I sat up to push him off the bed. But as if he’d expected it, he grabbed my thigh and pinned me between his legs.
Shocked by the pressure and weight, I looked up at him—

And then he suddenly yanked up the hem of my T-shirt.
His hand, colder than ice, pressed against my stomach like he was trying to thaw his frozen fingers.