The Unbelievers

Chapter 86

Moreover, although it was clearly false, since Chairman Yoo also claimed to have found a target, Yoo Seongil’s attention would be entirely focused on his mating partner.

Eunseong’s identity could be concealed if they were lucky. If that happened, Yoo Siwoon could move to a place with a mild climate and live together with Eunseong. If he abandoned all of this, his beliefs and his cause, he could have Eunseong. Instead of admitting to being trash to Eunseong who said he liked him, he could give him a different confession.

“Have you eaten anything?”

“What about you, ahjussi?”

“I had some snacks, but not dinner yet.”

“I thought you probably hadn’t eaten, so I waited without eating too.”

Yoo Siwoon was confused whether Eunseong was pretending not to have eaten or if he really hadn’t. Eunseong rubbed his lower abdomen, saying he was starving.

“I’ll go take a shower. Want to wait? If you’re hungry, eat first.”

“I’ve waited this long, I can wait a bit more.”

Yoo Siwoon got up from the sofa and headed to his room.

As he was undressing, Yoo Siwoon recalled encountering Eunseong naked in the dressing room and closed the door. He didn’t just close it, but locked it. He didn’t want to make a mistake by encountering Eunseong while undressed again. Thinking back now, there was something surprisingly brazen about the eyes that had stared at him, looking him up and down.

He felt blood rushing to his lower body. Yoo Siwoon was disgusted by the lewdness in his mind. Desire was like a flame that never tired or extinguished.

He frowned fiercely as he finished undressing. Entering the bathroom, he ignored the tightening sensation and cooled his heat with ice-cold water. Still, desire kept spreading throughout his body. Flames engulfed his entire body. Eunseong’s face appeared in his mind and wouldn’t disappear, his chest grew hot, and his heart began to race.

He finished showering with cold water until his entire body was numb with cold. He draped the towel he had roughly dried himself with over his head and opened the drawer where his underwear was kept. He was just putting one leg into his briefs when he heard the sound of the dressing room doorknob turning. Click, click.

Yoo Siwoon turned his head. Through the gap in the towel, he saw the door rattling. He hurriedly pulled up his underwear, shoved his legs into the first pants he could grab, and hastily pulled a shirt over his head. As he pulled down the top, he approached the door and unlocked it at the same time.

The door flew open due to the force being applied from the outside.

“…”

Eunseong was standing in front of the door.

“Why did you lock the door?”

Yoo Siwoon let out an exasperated breath.

“Because I thought you might do this.”

“Do what? I just came because I had something to say. What if I had something urgent to say and the door was locked?”

Eunseong, who had initially looked flustered by the sudden opening of the door, quickly changed his expression and started questioning Yoo Siwoon.

“What did you want to say?”

“…”

“What did you want to say?”

“What you want to eat… Whether you want to eat rice or ramen. I wanted to prepare it. I was going to prepare dinner while you were showering. The housekeeper doesn’t come anymore, right?”

“I’ll eat anything.”

“How am I supposed to know that? If I prepare everything and you say you don’t like it and won’t eat it, it’s already too late then. You must be hungry. I didn’t want to waste even a minute.”

“I’ve never complained about food in my life.”

“…That’s what I wanted to ask, so why did you lock the door? Since when did you start locking doors?”

“Because I thought you might peek.”

“Can’t I look a little?”

“What are you saying? Of course not.”

Yoo Siwoon roughly dried his wet hair with the towel once more and threw it into the laundry basket. The top he had hastily put on was askew, and his hair was sticking out in all directions.

“Why not? It’s not like looking will wear you out. You won’t even let me touch you. Even now, you’re avoiding me when I try to get close.”

“That’s, ah, I told you. I’m conservative.”

“What’s conservative about it? Why do you keep deflecting by saying you’re conservative? What does being conservative have to do with this?”

Eunseong kept grumbling, seemingly displeased with Yoo Siwoon’s lukewarm attitude.

“If you don’t understand, study or look it up.”

Even as Yoo Siwoon tried to change the subject by ignoring him, Eunseong was relentless.

“How am I supposed to look that up? ‘When I asked why he locked the door while showering, he said he’s conservative so he won’t show me, what does that mean?’ Can I ask like that?”

“Absolutely not.”

“Sometimes you tell me to do things, sometimes you tell me not to. What do you want me to do?”

Resentful eyes turned towards Yoo Siwoon. His lips protruded as if they had been pressed against his cheek.

“…”

Yoo Siwoon wanted to touch those soft, plump-looking lips again like before. But he didn’t carelessly reach out to Eunseong. His hands clenched into fists.

He had never wished so desperately for Eunseong not to be the Great Gap, for the prophecy not to be true. Although he didn’t believe in God, even despised God, he felt like praying to God.

Please let it not be true, please let it not be.

Let the prophecy be just a prophecy…

Let it be the vain hope of foolish people, let it be something that could never happen in the first place…

He prayed for all of this to be false.

“All day today… I wanted to call you but held back and waited.”

“…”

“It seemed like you had come home, but Director Nam wouldn’t let me go out. He scared me, telling me to stay put here, not to take even one step out.”

“…”

As if Yoo Siwoon’s gaze looking down at him was permission, Eunseong approached him, wrapped his arms around his waist, and buried his face in his chest. Yoo Siwoon stood there helplessly, not knowing where to put his hands, awkwardly held in place.

He didn’t know what was going on inside him. The heat he had barely suppressed with cold water spread throughout his body. He felt like a starved ghost seeing a well-cooked piece of meat. He self-deprecatingly asked himself what exactly he wanted to do with Eunseong.

Did he want to have a romance with someone he shouldn’t like, someone he shouldn’t be with? He should stop here, if he knew how he desperately wanted to stop, but Yoo Siwoon neither knew how nor could he stop his feelings.

Eunseong, who had been sniffing and smelling Yoo Siwoon, murmured.

“You smell good.”

“…”

“I want to wash with this too. The one you use. I like it, it smells a bit like an adult.”

Eunseong rubbed his nostrils against Yoo Siwoon’s chest. Yoo Siwoon’s hands, which he couldn’t bring himself to touch Eunseong, clenched into fists. He gripped them so tightly that the knuckles on the back of his hands turned white.

“There’s extra, so take it.”

“Director Nam is an adult too, but it’s different from him. Director Nam smells like your skin lotion, but you smell good.”

“How is it different from Director Nam?”

“Director Nam smells of strong skin lotion. But your smell… it’s just nice.”

The hesitating hand covered Eunseong’s back. He caressed Eunseong’s spine as he leaned against him. The touch, which started as if patting, unconsciously became a bit more intense.

Yoo Siwoon wasn’t denying his desire for Eunseong sexually. He was just afraid of the aftermath that would come after engaging in such acts. If he wanted to know the truth, he could have a relationship with Eunseong as Lee Joon-seung suggested.

But what if the prophecy was true and Eunseong ended up carrying his child… if the act done out of affection became the realization of the prophecy he so terribly dreaded.

That’s why Yoo Siwoon couldn’t do anything to Eunseong, and even doubted his own true feelings.

“Aren’t you going to eat dinner?”

Yoo Siwoon asked quietly, looking down at Eunseong who was hugging him tightly as if lost in some sentiment, intoxicated by the touch. Eunseong nodded, making a sound of agreement.

“Let’s eat. I’ve been holding back my hunger waiting all this time to eat together, so let’s eat.”

“…”

“But just a moment. Let’s stay like this for just a bit longer.”

Unable to push away the shoulders he had grasped to separate them, Yoo Siwoon hugged Eunseong back. A restrained sigh escaped very slowly from between his lips.

“I’m hungry, so could you go first and make some ramen? I’ll dry my hair and come.”

Yoo Siwoon spoke, barely managing to create some distance between himself and Eunseong who was clinging to him. At Yoo Siwoon’s request, Eunseong, who had been holding his waist, looked up at him for a long time as if not wanting to let go, then said okay and separated.

After Eunseong disappeared, Yoo Siwoon rubbed his tightening chest and closed the dressing room door.

He rummaged through various drawers. Finding what looked like a feather duster used by the housekeeper for cleaning, he grasped it. Yoo Siwoon gritted his teeth, leaned one hand against the wall, and took deep breaths while panting, then soon struck between his legs with the hand holding the feather duster.

“Ugh!”

A pain that made his face turn pale hit his lower body. He had only hit once, but sweat beaded on his forehead. Yoo Siwoon took the towel he had used to dry himself and bit into it to muffle his screams. He raised the feather duster high and brought it down on his genitals like a switch.

“Mmph!”

Only after several such blows did his sexual desire for Eunseong disappear. Yoo Siwoon, who had been shuddering from the pain that made his entire body tremble, barely managed to answer when he heard a voice calling him.

“…Yeah, I’m coming. I’m coming now.”

Yoo Siwoon staggered as he moved.