Although a Villain, My Wish is World Peace

Suddenly want to talk? Unlike Han Seo-hyeon, I had no idea what Cha Song-jin was looking for me to talk about.

“Ah, is it not okay?”

Cha Song-jin who peeked his head out from behind the door rolled his eyes while watching me.

“Come in.”

As soon as my permission was given, Cha Song-jin quickly came inside.

“What do you want to talk about?”

“It seemed like you were fighting with Seo-hyeon.”

“You heard everything?”

“The walls are thin here.”

The walls of a top-class hotel are thin? At my suspicious look, Cha Song-jin rolled his eyes and added:

“Or maybe I was curious about what you two were saying and had my ear against the wall…”

What a grand way to say he eavesdropped. Cha Song-jin quickly exclaimed at my incredulous look:

“B-but I was worried when you two went into the room with such a serious atmosphere.”

Well, it’s understandable for Cha Song-jin to be worried. The shrimp’s back always bursts in a whale fight. It’s natural for a shrimp to be worried.

Cha Song-jin who sat down on the chair while watching me carefully asked:

“Can I ask what you fought about?”

I pondered for a moment. Should I tell him? Telling him wasn’t much of a problem, but how Cha Song-jin would take this issue was the problem.

I didn’t want to talk about killing people or such in front of Cha Song-jin as much as possible.

But…

“You never know, it might help.”

Maybe I should talk about it, if only to acknowledge Cha Song-jin’s sincerity in saying this much.

—Good grief, anyone listening would think you’re doing him a favor. When in fact you feel like kneeling down in gratitude.

‘Ahem, ahem. It was a time when I needed another perspective, wasn’t it?’

No matter how much I rack my brain alone, I can’t find the answer.

I don’t expect Cha Song-jin to give a satisfying answer to this problem, but you never know. As Cha Song-jin said, it might help.

I briefly told Cha Song-jin about the conversation I had with Han Seo-hyeon. I tried to moderate it as much as possible, but it seems I failed in the end.

Judging by how much paler Cha Song-jin’s face became after hearing everything I said.

—Don’t you think you summarized it strangely?

‘What’s wrong with my summary?’

—”I’ve killed quite a lot of people, you know? Ah, but I’d prefer if Seo-hyeon didn’t… I told him not to kill people. Seo-hyeon got upset. What should I do?” I recited exactly what you said, how is it?

It was terrible.

‘…Summarizing isn’t my specialty.’

Fortunately, Cha Song-jin who had been hit by my summary attack soon came to his senses.

“S-so that’s what you fought about.”

Did he really come to his senses? Or did he come to his senses only to blank out again because the content was so strange?

“Maybe it’s not right to consult about this kind of thing. Even if it’s difficult to find an answer, should I just think about it alone?”

At my words, Cha Song-jin immediately shook his head.

“No. I’d really, really like it if you consulted with me.”

“Well, I’ve been thinking about it alone but couldn’t come to any conclusion. It’s understandable for Seo-hyeon to be angry.”

I postponed the conversation several times, and even after having the conversation, I couldn’t come to a clear conclusion.

I really am a terrible leader.

“So what do you think? What should I do?”

At my question, Cha Song-jin gulped. I casually threw out words to ease Cha Song-jin’s burden:

“Just say whatever comes to mind, it’s my job to make the decision anyway. I just want to borrow a cat’s paw.”

Perhaps encouraged by my words, Cha Song-jin slowly opened his mouth:

“The best way would be not to kill people so these kinds of words don’t come up.”

Hmm, even so, I didn’t expect this kind of answer. Cha Song-jin who examined my expression quickly added:

“O-of course, you probably didn’t expect this answer. But still, um, I wanted to mention this method first to fundamentally solve the problem.”

I smiled brightly at Cha Song-jin’s words.

“That’s right, if we decide not to kill people, we won’t have to fight over this issue anymore.”

Well, an ordinary person would say something like this.

Is there really a need to kill? Just don’t kill and that’s it.

Yes, how nice it would be if the problem ended so simply. I forced a smile and said to Cha Song-jin:

“Thanks for listening…”

“Wait, I’m not done yet.”

Cha Song-jin who hurriedly cut off my words added while watching me:

“Of course, I know that’s not realistic. I also know there’s a reason Weltschmerz chose the extreme method of murder.”

I blinked at Cha Song-jin’s words. I never thought Cha Song-jin would say words defending murder.

I looked straight into Cha Song-jin’s eyes.

“Are you serious?”

“Yes, I’m serious. I-I said I wanted to become Weltschmerz too, didn’t I?”

“You said you hated being a villain even if you died.”

“…That’s why the standard is important.”

I frowned at Cha Song-jin’s words.

“Standard?”

Because a word I hadn’t thought of at all appeared. At my question, Cha Song-jin calmly continued:

“What was most difficult when making the textbook… was setting the standard. By what standard would I decide what’s right and wrong.”

Cha Song-jin pointed to the middle of the table with his finger.

“If we say above where I pointed is ‘right’ and below is ‘wrong’, it’s exactly half and half now, but…”

Cha Song-jin’s finger moved down.

“If it becomes like this, what was wrong earlier becomes right now. Morality isn’t something fixed. Unlike laws, it can change anytime depending on the situation.”

Cha Song-jin’s face was serious. At that serious attitude, I also sat up straight and listened to Cha Song-jin’s words.

Cha Song-jin who gulped looked straight at my face and said:

“You’re our organization’s standard. You’re our leader, and, um, I’m like this too but the kids rely on you…”

Cha Song-jin who shook his head vigorously put his fist on the table and said:

“So your standard is our standard. Our organization’s, um, morality changes according to your actions.”

“I’m the standard…”

“Yes, I thought about it the whole time I was making the textbook. What your standard is. But, I really couldn’t figure it out.”

Cha Song-jin looked at me and said:

“You, you’re a strange person. You’re a villain, yes, a villain who wouldn’t be unjustly punished if hit by the hammer of the law right now as you say, but you have specific targets. Let’s only do bad things to bad guys. What bad things you’ll do to those bad guys, how bad a guy you’ll target. Until now, that standard wasn’t important. We just had to follow you. But you see…”

Ahem, ahem, Cha Song-jin cleared his throat and continued:

“You told me to teach morality. To give room for self-thought. Then you need to tell us. The standard we should keep.”

“My standard…”

“Yes, as I said earlier, I really couldn’t figure out your standard on my own. I felt uncomfortable just guessing and then teaching.”

Certainly, I didn’t pay any attention despite telling him to teach morality. I didn’t expect Cha Song-jin to think this far. What I wanted was for him to teach Jae-ho basic common sense like ‘raise your hand and cross at the blue light’…

“And you know, I think this standard is needed to resolve your fight with Seo-hyeon too.”

Can it resolve the problem with Han Seo-hyeon too? Cha Song-jin looked at me and asked:

“Let me ask directly. By what standard are you killing people?”

I answered lightly to Cha Song-jin’s words:

“Bad guys?”

For now, my standard is ‘absolutely don’t harm children and good people’. Adult criminals? Who cares, die! Die and become fertilizer for this world!

At my words, Cha Song-jin nodded and said:

“Right, I thought so. Then how bad does a guy have to be before it’s okay to kill him? I said the standard is important. Just saying bad guys isn’t an answer. You’re not going to kill everyone who littered or jaywalked, right?”

Come to think of it, I had never once considered whether this person was really okay to kill when killing someone until now.

I just mercilessly took lives if they were an obstacle to me, if they had committed even a small crime.

Because…

It’s convenient that way. No need to worry about the aftermath.

Wait, when did I start thinking like this?

When did I start thinking killing people was a ‘clean solution’?

My hands trembled finely.

The moment I realized who planted this thought in me, I felt like I would vomit right away.

‘…This is something Seol Rok-jin would do.’

Right, getting rid of obstacles. That’s exactly the kind of behavior Seol Rok-jin would do.

It’s just as Seol Rok-jin said. The me who used to tremble at just the thought of killing someone, at just the thought that someone had died, was gone.

Before I knew it, I had become a person who felt nothing even after killing someone with my own hands.

—Hey, get a hold of yourself.

Cha Song-jin who examined my face exclaimed in surprise:

“Why, what’s wrong?”

Cha Song-jin who saw my trembling hands cried out in shock:

“Are you in pain? Did you get sick? S-seeing you suddenly like this, are you a-allergic? But you didn’t eat anything, right?”

The thoughts filling my head blurred at that dumbfounded reaction.

“No, it’s not that, I just thought I might have killed too indiscriminately…”

“Uh, um.”

Cha Song-jin rolled his eyes at my words. His face looked troubled, like he wanted to comfort me but couldn’t carelessly say anything given the content. Seeing Cha Song-jin’s dumbfounded face, I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Haha.”

“What, why are you s-suddenly laughing?”

“No, just because.”

I lowered my gaze. In my head, I kept recalling what Cha Song-jin had said.

Standard, standard.

Seol Rok-jin’s standard was infinitely low.

If it bothered him, if he didn’t like it, or for fun. That bastard was someone who could commit murder anytime.

Me? I was similar too. Spending time by that guy’s side, seeing Seol Rok-jin kill people countless times, I had unknowingly been stained.

But now I have people I’m responsible for…

“Can I just think carefully about that standard from now on?”

As Cha Song-jin said, I needed a new standard.

A new standard for us, not Seol Rok-jin’s.